How to stop missing someone? 10 tips from psychologists!

“Out of sight, out of mind,” if only it were so simple... In the harsh reality of gray everyday life, the more you try to distract yourself from the thoughts that endlessly scroll through your head, the more difficult it is to do so. And every time they become more and more intrusive. Not everyone can independently overcome the depressing state of all-consuming melancholy and sadness. Note that it can lead to nervous exhaustion, and then not far from a psychiatric hospital. So let's take care of ourselves and get rid of longing for a person who is not around for some reason.

What ways will help?

In such situations, psychologists give the following recommendations:

Any activity can save you from constant longing for a person, the main thing is that it is interesting. If you have a hobby, now is the time to actively engage in it. If you don’t know what to do with your free time, start experimenting and maybe you’ll find something you like.
If sadness takes you by surprise, try to distract yourself from these thoughts. A good option is to read a book. If you are at work, clean up your workspace and write a to-do list for the near future.
Some people need to immerse themselves in work and always be on the job. This is an effective way to get over a breakup and not get caught up in negative emotions.
Another effective piece of advice is to not avoid communicating with other people; on the contrary, try to be around positive people more often.

General Tips

There can be many reasons for separation. This includes moving, a break in a relationship, and even the death of a person. There are general recommendations that will help you cope with longing for your loved one in all these cases. Let's look at them.

Plunge yourself into your work

The best way to overcome the blues is to get busy with work. If you're used to working slapdashly, now is the time to reconsider your attitude. Work is one of the most important components in a person’s life. It is not only a source of material wealth, but also a reliable psychological support. It is through work that we feel connected to society and feel needed and useful.

Set yourself specific professional goals and start realizing them. This will not only help you take your mind off sad thoughts, but also reach a new professional level. You can enroll in advanced training courses, learn a foreign language, or master a related field. There are always opportunities for growth, no matter what you do.

Change your scenery

You can combat longing for a person from your past with new experiences. Only impressions must be vivid and emotionally rich in order to be able to push painful thoughts out of your head. Go on a trip to an unfamiliar country - the further the better. I just warn you in advance - rest should not be idle. Don't expect to lie passively on the beach for two weeks and return home with renewed thoughts.

Organize a busy program for yourself so that you don’t have a minute to think about painful thoughts. Visit museums, attractions, beautiful places. Chat with locals and immerse yourself in an unfamiliar culture. Both your head and body must be constantly busy, only then will you be able to reboot your brain.

Do some physical labor

When cats scratch at your soul, you really want to just lie buried in your pillow and do nothing. It seems that you lie down for a while and the melancholy will subside. However, this feeling is deceptive.

Idleness is the worst enemy for anyone who is overcome by sad thoughts. You kind of give the brain a signal that it’s time to turn on the energy-saving mode, and it obeys. Every day it will be more and more difficult for you to force yourself to do something. So, slowly but surely you will sink deeper and deeper into apathy.

Why does physical labor help to cope with melancholy? The fact is that the brain at a certain point in time can be focused on one thing. When we do physical work, most of the energy is directed into the muscles. There is nothing left for mental activity. Therefore, if you cannot control your thoughts, you just need to turn them off.

General cleaning, rearrangement, and gardening work are ideal for these purposes. Plunge yourself into your work, and within half an hour you will feel much better. Try to get as tired as possible and fall asleep immediately after work.

Get into the sport

Sports are another good way to stop being bored. The mechanism of its action is the same as the previous one. You need to load your body as much as possible and get as tired as possible. Strength training is best for this purpose. They are literally able to squeeze all the juice out of you, leaving no chance for painful thoughts to suck the energy out of you.

How to stop missing your loved one

There is a category of people who have a hard time being separated from their loved one for a couple of days and are frightened by the very thought of being separated for a long period of time. How to stop missing your loved one if the separation is very short?

Psychologists advise to distract yourself from your own thoughts and do anything: mental work, physical activity, useful things or, conversely, meaningless ones. The main thing is that the activity captivates you, and does not add sad thoughts and melancholy. Some girls like to add fuel to the fire and start watching sentimental melodramas. We do not recommend this practice!

Remember yourself! Look at parting with your loved one from the other side: time has freed up that you can devote to yourself. Think about your goals, think about your true desires and make a plan for further action.

Remember that besides your partner, there are other people in life who also need your attention. Call your family and friends, think about friends or acquaintances you haven’t seen for a long time and arrange a meeting.

What if you never see each other?

It is much more difficult to endure the final separation from a person. If your love for your former lover remains, but he has found someone else or moved to another city or country, it may take months, or even years, to stop feeling very sad for him.

If your soul misses a person, and you are very impatient to admit it, you should write about your own emotions towards him. It is possible that his love remains, and a frank conversation will be a chance to be together with his beloved again. In any case, even after refusal, you will get relief, because you will no longer have to suffer from guesswork.

How to deal with longing for a person who left

When parting with near and dear people, a natural manifestation of the human psyche is melancholy and mental pain. In this case, try to deal with the difficulties arising in your soul. What are some ways to ease the longing for a person who has left?

If a relative, loved one or loved one has left and there are hundreds of kilometers between you, remember that communication does not end there. After all, you can write an SMS or call on Skype, and talking with a loved one will become much easier. Modern means of communication make it possible to maintain even visual contact, which greatly facilitates separation.

Don’t get used to talking on the phone every day and texting about little things, otherwise you will be dependent on each other. Psychologists also recommend leaving your comfort zone and finding a like-minded person around you with whom you can talk, share something and ask for advice.

Look to the future with hope and plan to visit each other. Try to write your thoughts on paper every time your hand reaches for the phone, write an SMS or call. This way, you can analyze how much you need such frequent communication. You definitely need to occupy your free time with something useful. Open your heart to new acquaintances and people.

How not to miss a person who has managed without you for a long time?

Unfortunately, many of our feelings are not reciprocated. It may seem that you have a best friend in life, but after a while, it turns out that he doesn’t consider you that way. His life continues without you, but you feel offended and upset. disappointment and longing for this person. How can I stop yearning for a person who has managed without me for a long time?

I recommend you watch: How to behave with a man so that he is afraid of losing you

Psychologists advise, first of all, to allow yourself to react emotionally to the situation and not keep negative emotions to yourself. Each person experiences difficulties differently, so give free rein to your emotions and do exactly what you feel. Give yourself time to reconsider your thoughts and come to terms with them. After the emotions subside, promise yourself to return to your normal lifestyle.

Secondly, try talking about your feelings with a loved one. We are sure that such a conversation will help you understand yourself. Thirdly, try to write down emotions and feelings, keep a diary that will help you sort out negative feelings. Every time thoughts about this person appear, try to re-read your letters.

And of course, don’t forget that life is dynamic. Your circle of friends and acquaintances changes over the years and, perhaps not at all by chance, this person simply went beyond your social circle. Give a little time and the emptiness will be filled with new people, emotions and impressions.

We leave no room for sadness

What to do if you really miss a person when the relationship cannot be restored? In this case, the following tips will help:

The most productive method to forget about feelings for your ex-boyfriend or girlfriend is to find a replacement. For this reason, it is worth being open to new dates, communication and flirting, and not withdrawing into yourself.
Go on a trip. Fascinating landscapes and colorful emotions will not let you miss the past. Traveling is especially useful if you have family or friends nearby.
Attend fun events and watch humorous programs. But tearful melodramas will make you feel even more sad for your beloved.
Find faults with your ex and remember all the negative circumstances in your life. It is absolutely certain that after this you will feel much less sad.
If the relationship cannot be restored, then you should not seek a meeting with the person with whom you broke up. This will only open the wound, stir up feelings again, and make the melancholy unbearable.

Beautiful SMS for your beloved man. "Miss and love"

Love for you makes the blood run cold in my veins, so get some rings ready!
My love for you has no size and this feeling is eternal!
I thank fate for sending you to me.
You made me the happiest woman in the world! I love you to the point of butterflies in my stomach!
I love you every second of my life!
Darling! You are the valve of my heart! You are the pupils of my eyes! You are the blood in my veins!
Having met you, I got the meaning of life. Thank you for being there, my love!
It’s very interesting for me to be with you, it’s warm, cozy, calm and my heart wants to love!
I love you, and let everyone envy me!
Finally, I understood the reason for my accelerated heartbeat - it’s love for you!
Your kind smile makes me the happiest, and loving you is like floating under the clouds!
The most wonderful feeling settled in my heart the day I met you, my love!
With you, I learned where seventh heaven is and what love tastes like!
I think about you indecently often, and only your name sounds in my head, my love!
My heart burns with a hot flame of love, and I want to give you this wonderful feeling every day!
I can’t suffer anymore and I want to tell you these words - I love you!
Every minute spent next to you is a heavenly pleasure for me. I love you all!
You excite my consciousness, and I understand that I have no chance of freedom - my heart is in your captivity!
I don’t believe in accidents - I love you and you are my destiny!
When I met you, the world around me shone with colorful colors and this is love!
I am the happiest in the world because I love you and enjoy life!
You are like Diesel jeans to me, just as beloved!)

I have become addicted... to loving you! I hope it's mutual.
Can you imagine, I fell in love with the one who is reading this SMS now)
Today I dreamed of my love, which moved into reality. Her choice fell on you)
My embarrassed look says one thing - I love you!
My love for you will dry up when all the oceans on Earth dry up.
It's been a night since I can't sleep without you next to me, my love!
The most secret corner of my soul keeps the name of a loved one, and it’s you – the one about whom all my dreams and dreams are!
Being next to you, I don’t feel the ground under my feet, because I am inspired by my love for you!
My power of love for you can melt the thickest ice, and I am very happy that I am experiencing such sublime feelings!
You are my only swan, whom I have been waiting for all my life, and now we will sail together along the river of love!
The door to my world of love is open only to you!
This morning I woke up to the sound of a woodpecker, but then I realized that it was my heart that was beating out of love for you!)
Cupid's arrow pointed me to you, and I am not against this choice!
Love for you is reflected with a bright sparkle in my eyes, and I am incredibly happy about it!
You are the King (Prince) in my castle of Love, within the walls of which the magical melodies of the most beautiful feeling on Earth are heard.

Beat the melancholy!

When your brain has nothing to do, it looks for ways to keep itself busy. What does he immediately start thinking about? Of course, about the house. And this is where the emotional component comes in.

To prevent this from happening, be active: participate in common activities, go on excursions, explore the city on your own, communicate with your roommates and classmates.

You can start keeping a journal to remember each day of your trip. Who knows, maybe you have a talent for blogging! Homesickness can be your inspiration!

Short romantic SMS to your loved one

I want to feel your strong, strong hands every day. From your kisses I melt all over and feel trembling throughout my body. I want you to touch my neck and waist. Oh God, I miss you so much!
My sunshine, I miss you so much, I think about you constantly. I would like to be with you always. I want you to know that I love you very much and value you very much. I want to fall asleep and wake up with you!

I love you just the way you are. I love your look, your touch. I love catching your breath on my cheek and when you gently whisper in my ear “I love you!”

It seems like an eternity has passed since the moment we said goodbye. I so want to hug you again, hear your voice, see your smile. There is nothing more depressing than separation. I miss you, honey, I'm looking forward to seeing you.

I want to hug you quickly, hold you close, kiss you. I love you with all my soul, and I’m really looking forward to meeting you!

My love, my destiny. You are the other half without whom I cannot exist. My world, my thoughts, dreams, dreams, everything that is dear to me in the world is YOU!
I know that I will miss you tomorrow more than today, because today I miss you even more than yesterday!

I'm waiting for you at night, I'm waiting for you during the day, I can't wait for the two of us to go to bed together, to get up together, to walk together hand in hand through life!

My good one... If you suddenly start to get bored, dial the number and press the green button, and at the other end of the phone a girl who misses you madly will answer you!

I kiss you on the lips, I kiss you on the nose, I miss you very much, Let's dream about each other in our sweetest dreams this night?

I want to drown in the endless ocean of your eyes, dissolve in your breath, plunge into tenderness. I want to drink the scent of your skin with my lips, to feel your warmth with every cell. I want to go crazy from your touch.
I want to tell you that all my thoughts now are only about you. I imagine you in my arms, the curves of your body along which my palms slide. You can’t even imagine how much I want you...
You are the rays of my sun, you are the wind of my sky, you are the waves of my ocean... and the beat of my heart...

I don’t want to fall asleep now, I want to look into your eyes, I want to touch your lips, I want to return to you for a moment...

Darling, every day without our meeting is an eternity for me. I miss you very much and look forward to seeing you. Only your calls and SMS please and encourage. Let these days fly by quickly, and let the sweet hours of our meeting come!

Emotional addiction

Why are people bored? Because they are emotionally dependent, that is, they feel that they have lost personal autonomy (or have actually lost it). As a result, the person:

Experiences suffering when the object of his feelings is unavailable/not paying attention, etc.
He feels that he cannot free himself from this addiction.
Is under a negative chronic influence that binds his feelings.

Indeed, when a person enters into a close relationship with someone, he involuntarily falls into emotional dependence. For example, if his companion feels good, then the person rejoices, and if he feels bad, then he begins to feel sad. And this can continue for a long time, people seem to have turned into two communicating vessels and now they can’t live without each other. That's why a person gets bored.

Temporary separation

Psychologists give some advice to those whose friends are far away:

1. Keep track of the days.
The visibility of the path overcome will help you concentrate on the desired approach to a pleasant meeting. If you cross out the next date on the wall calendar day after day, not forgetting to mentally congratulate yourself on your victory, the wait will not be burdensome, it will turn into a kind of “journey” from one point in the time period to another.
2. Resort to useful small chores.
In order not to constantly think about your loved one, you should direct more attention to everyday or additional activities and activities. Improving your environment is the best way to distract yourself. The time has come to wash the windows, change the curtains, plant some greenery on the window sill or room, and update the façade of the house. This way, the days of separation will bring some joy and will not respond with sadness.
3. Plan a long-term project.
The burden of waiting is easily compensated by doing responsible and long-term work. If it is possible to notify the partner about upcoming plans, this will mobilize all efforts to complete them in anticipation of the general joy of the results.
4. Use Internet communications
. Modern methods of communication and exchange of information at a distance will help: Skype, e-mail, postcards. Every message sent leaves a person waiting for a response. A separation distributed in this way over segments will fly by easily and unnoticed.
5. Do not reject communication with other people.

Attention and time are valuable resources, and often for some people, surrounded by a family or an overly busy person, there is not a free day or hour. Therefore, this period can be used to visit friends and forgotten acquaintances, distant relatives.

I'm afraid to communicate with people

SMS to a guy in prose. "I miss and want you"

In your absence, a wave of loneliness covered me... beloved, throw me a life preserver from boredom!
My tender love for you, like the petals of a scarlet rose, was pierced by the sharp thorns of separation...
Separation with hot sand tortures my subtle soul, which always strives in your direction, beloved!
The painful wound of loneliness becomes deeper when I don’t hear your breathing next to me for a long time...
Without your gentle touches, my body cries and there is not enough oxygen in my blood.
My loving heart is mercilessly scratched by boredom, but I hold on with all my strength, because I know what a storm of passion awaits us when we meet!
You are sweeter to me than any dessert, my beloved date)
My velvet skin thirsts for sin and I can no longer resist it. Beloved, quickly break the thread of separation!
I miss you so much, my boy, that I have already removed the blockage from all parts of my body)
I honestly admit to you that I lost the war with sadness, and I capitulate with pleasure... I surrender my fortress to you without a fight!
I'm tired of remembering the taste of your lips! I demand an update and don't want to wait any longer!
I hope that today I will meet with you under the same blanket?)
Darling, the time has come for all the achievements - I want to be with you all night until the morning!
If we don’t meet now, your baby will burn with passion!
I thought that we only live once and decided that if we sin, we should sin to the fullest! I hope you'll join me?
My angel! The fairy wants to fulfill your deepest desires today)
I'm already tired of taking off my own clothes! Be human, maybe you can help?
I don’t intend to sleep all night today... but I don’t want to just lie there either)
If someone now asked me what I want most, I would answer - to steal you from everyone and for a long time!
Dear, you know how shy I am, and it’s not me who writes this, but my anxious fingers - I want you to the point of insanity!

Before going to bed, out of boredom, I was playing locker rooms with the stars and lost... they asked you to undress me for them)
I want to catch your passionate gaze in my most intimate place!
I no longer want to repeat the mistakes that led to separation from you! I want everything now, my love!
I want you to undress me, as the Moon bares in the night sky, and we will fly into its distance)
If I sin from the heart, then I only want it with you, my ray of sunshine!
I can’t stand the long wait anymore - I want to be a slave to your erotic desires!
I invite you today to a date in one very romantic place... in my warm bed)
Be my blanket today - cover with your body, but don’t forget to do one thing)
The separation has set me on fire! Come quickly to put out the fire, but most importantly don’t forget the hose and put on your uniform)
I want to let you into the world of my unbridled fantasies... will you help me deal with them in reality?
I want you more than fresh strawberries in winter!
I want to scream furiously and choke... I decided to surrender myself to you as a prisoner)
My fateful half! I'm so wound up that I want to slow down under you)
Resurrect my body, which is slowly dying without your love!
My dear Tulip! Your Orchid has already powdered the pink bud and is waiting to meet the pistil)
I want love in French with you, my beloved Croissant!

Beautiful and funny gentle SMS to your beloved (beloved) I miss and love

Where are you now, my beloved? This is your Juliet, who misses her Romeo at the window.
Even the sun on a winter day doesn’t make me happy when you’re not around. I miss you very much!
Without you, my love, the rainbow is dim. I miss my native land like a migratory bird!
Every day that you are not around is like torture for me. I miss you, I wait and I love you!
It's raining now, and it makes me miss you. When will we meet? I really miss you!
If you are not next to me, then tears come to my eyes. I really miss the person dearest to my heart!
Every moment apart from you is real torture for me. Insanely miss! I think about you every hour, remembering how happy we were together. I miss you and look forward to seeing you!
You spend so much time on your work, and I understand that, but I can’t help how I feel – I miss you incredibly!
Your passionate kiss goodbye still burns my lips. I miss you, I’m waiting and all my thoughts are only about you!
Let this short SMS convey to you the power of my “I miss you”!
I listen to every step outside the doors, because I miss my boy like crazy!
I miss you so much that I’m ready to run towards my beloved man!
I hope that while you are apart, you are as bored as I am, my other half of my heart!
I miss you and dream of being in your strong arms again.
Every minute I live brings me closer to you. Darling, I miss you unbearably being apart!
I miss your voice. Maybe you'll call?
I feel very sad and lonely. Nothing makes you happy when you're not around. I miss you so much!
Today I had a dream that we were together. Now I miss you even more!
I forget about feminine pride when you are not around, and I am ready to go to the ends of the world for my love. I miss you very much!
Just as the Earth is waiting for awakening after winter, so am I for our meeting. I miss you terribly!
Where can I get the strength to survive separation from you? I miss you, I miss you!