A suspicious person can be described as a person experiencing constant anxiety, which has no justified reason for its occurrence . People suffering from suspiciousness often experience panic attacks and treat the world around them with increased suspicion. Often the phenomenon under consideration is intertwined with hypochondria (excessive concern about one’s own health). Most suspicious people suffer from various phobias and rarely show a desire for their own personal development. In order to get rid of this condition, you need to understand the reasons for its occurrence. Let's look at what suspiciousness is and consider various aspects of this phenomenon.
A suspicious person is a person who constantly and usually for no reason experiences a feeling of anxiety about any future events
Suspiciousness - what is it?
Psychologist Alexander Brodsky identifies 3 options for the manifestation of suspiciousness:
- This is a situation where a person thinks too highly of himself. He considers himself much more significant than those around him. In this case, synonyms for suspiciousness are “pride”, “arrogance”.
- Manifestations of suspiciousness are a person’s inability to make his choice. A suspicious person cannot come to a final decision for a long time, fearing that it will be wrong. Such people often shift responsibility for making decisions to others.
- Suspiciousness is a huge number of experiences that constantly swarm in a person’s head. This is increased anxiety about future events, about health, excessive worry about the opinions of others about oneself, anxiety about prospects for professional growth, imaginary fear about everything, a pathological feeling of persecution and many other worries.
Interesting to know! Most often, a hypochondriac state is causeless, and this has been scientifically proven.
Close “relatives” of suspiciousness are timidity, indecisiveness, distrust and other conditions that do not allow one to get rid of fears. Suspicious people are usually not confident in themselves and think that they are constantly doing something wrong - this is the root of the problem. This definition of suspiciousness is considered basic by most people.
All options have something in common - a person’s suspiciousness is seen as the inability to normally concentrate on objective reality. But why does the suspicious person himself not realize his suspiciousness?
According to Alexander Brodsky, there are 2 main reasons for this, which he conventionally divides into male and female, and both of them lie in the socialization of a person.
The first reason – male – is the fear of making a mistake. When a child is taught to be independent, he is unconsciously instilled with a constant feeling of punishment for making a mistake. The child is afraid of doing something wrong and in adulthood becomes a suspicious person.
The second reason, which is called female, is the habit of shifting responsibility to others. If a child often consults with adults on how to solve a particular problem, many people like it, because it’s easier to manage. But because of this, the child begins to think that it is easier to ask someone for help than to solve the problem himself. If he has to solve a problem himself, it drives him into a stupor, and this feeling carries over into adulthood.
The division into male and female causes is conditional. Alexander Brodsky called them that because he encountered them more often in men or women. In fact, these causes can occur in both sexes.
Definition and signs
In psychology, suspiciousness is a feeling that is inherent in restless, pessimistic people, which is often associated with anxiety and depressive disorders. A suspicious person is an individual who always assumes danger, regardless of the presence or absence of reasons. In S. Ozhegov’s dictionary, such people are described as fearing everything, seeing in everything an unfavorable outcome for themselves. Other signs that will help you understand what a suspicious person is:
- Takes everything “close to heart”, attaching great importance to little things.
- Takes third-party statements of others personally.
- Excessively worried about himself and loved ones.
A suspicious person is one who, when reading a medical encyclopedia, will definitely discover symptoms of many diseases, which means there is an extra reason for worry. He easily finds reasons for unrest, elevating real and imaginary problems to the level of global, inevitable and insoluble. This condition can accompany an individual throughout his life.
Having heard about the disease of friends or colleagues, he begins to look for similar symptoms in himself. When communicating with a patient, he will certainly discover signs of illness, even if an hour ago he felt excellent. Increased anxiety extends to different areas of life. Typically, a suspicious person finds a reason to worry in everyday situations, which means an unlimited number of potential reasons for fear:
- State of health (your own and those of loved ones).
- Accidents, disasters.
- Criminal attack.
- Secret persecution by intelligence officers.
- Conspiracies of colleagues, neighbors, acquaintances.
Spreading his experiences to those around him, a suspicious person actively cares for and instructs them, often achieving the opposite effect - rejection and irritation due to overprotection. People predisposed to developing anxiety disorders have a characteristic type of appearance. They are distinguished by an asthenic physique, pale skin, their movements are constrained and indecisive.
Is suspiciousness a disease or not?
Suspiciousness - a disease or not - this is the question that arises among people who are familiar with these conditions. An overly suspicious person can go very far in his experiences, and such people require professional treatment. Constantly increased anxiety is not yet a disease, but it can lead to mental disorder. The deeper it is, the faster you can develop a mental disorder, and the stronger it will be. In addition, excessive suspiciousness can be one of the symptoms of a hidden mental disorder, for example, psychasthenia. Therefore, if you notice it in yourself or your loved ones, this is an alarming sign, do not hesitate to contact a psychotherapist or psychologist.
Here are the main signs of a suspicious person:
- excessive anxiety;
- manic concern for one's health;
- too painful reaction to the opinions of others;
- feeling of constant persecution;
- obsession with constant self-doubt;
- feeling of suspicion.
Contrary to popular belief, suspiciousness is not only a women's problem. Man or girl - anyone can be a suspicious person, regardless of gender and age.
It is quite difficult to overcome this condition on your own. But, if you make enough efforts and contact a specialist in time, you can quite get rid of suspiciousness.
Definition of the concept
Suspiciousness is an incorrect attitude, which is supported by self-hypnosis. A suspicious person sees a problem on a global scale in everything and considers himself a failure.
There are two main fears that affect such people.
- Get sick. These individuals are obsessed with their health, can study medicine, and are constantly looking for a fatal disease.
- To be deceived.
Excessive suspiciousness is a condition, the main manifestations of which are anxiety and constant worries. In most cases, negative thoughts have no confirmation in reality.
It is necessary to distinguish between suspiciousness and anxiety.
- Anxiety is a fear that is caused by real reasons and specific circumstances.
- Suspiciousness, a character trait (pathological) that has no basis.
What are the reasons for excessive suspiciousness?
Experts say that the causes of suspiciousness come from childhood. Parents’ too strong desire to make their children more beautiful, smarter and more successful by constantly pointing out their shortcomings bears fruit in the form of complexes. If a child constantly feels guilty, unsure of himself, thinks that he is doing something wrong, suspiciousness arises in him. Instilling imaginary feelings of shame, fear and uncertainty is a sure way to raise a suspicious person, so this should not be done under any circumstances.
Reasons that arise in adulthood may be associated with past fears, failures in various areas and negative experiences with people. Suspiciousness is firmly “absorbed” into the character and becomes part of the personality. Imaginary fear causes obsessive thoughts, which are sometimes very difficult to convince a person.
A separate type of suspiciousness is hypochondria . Such a person is very suspicious of his health. Such a person constantly finds symptoms of a non-existent disease and tries to treat it. He reads her symptoms on the Internet, in most cases finds them in himself and begins self-medication or starts going to doctors. Such a person is dominated by self-hypnosis, turning into suspiciousness. Wikipedia will tell you more about this condition; we will not delve into it very deeply.
Interesting fact: the personality type with excessive suspiciousness is anxious about the opinions of other people, but, interestingly, expects help from them.
Changing habits for self-confidence
So start valuing yourself. You are an individual, you deserve to love and be loved, and you are a unique person, there is no other like you, live, breathe and give joy to yourself and those around you.
It happens that even a strong person cannot cope with his suspiciousness and suspiciousness. But if there is a desire, then you need to change your habits, since it is habits that push us to act every time according to the script. You need to start small, for example, take a different road to work. Or change your daily schedule a little, introducing more positive things into it. Changing habits entails changing your mood and lifestyle. Then there will be no place for suspiciousness.
Is it worth fighting suspiciousness?
Psychology is a science that studies in detail what suspiciousness is, how it differs from other conditions, what it means to be suspicious, who is a suspicious person, how to get rid of it or cure a concomitant mental disorder in time. Experts put forward many opinions on this matter, but agree on one thing - a person can drive everyone around him crazy with his suspiciousness. Therefore, it is worth thinking about ways to stop being suspicious.
But it’s not just the people around you – suspiciousness can cause mental disorders. Even if it doesn’t come to this, a suspicious person cannot enjoy life, because strong anxiety about everything prevents him from doing this. “I very much doubt”, “I’m afraid”, “I’m not sure that I will succeed” - a person often repeats these words, which only reinforces his suspiciousness, and in the eyes of others he becomes a grouch.
You need to overcome suspiciousness as quickly as possible. There is one problem here - a suspicious person tries to fight it on his own. This is a big mistake, because it is almost impossible to cope on your own, because you cannot look at yourself from the outside. As a result, even more feelings of fear and anxiety appear.
When is it time to see a psychologist?
A person must understand that suspiciousness can harm his psychological health. The development of a mental illness that will make life unbearable cannot be ruled out. Psychologists make this diagnosis when the patient experiences nervous instability and provocation of psychosomatic diseases. If the condition is advanced, then complete remission cannot be achieved. The person will be forced to constantly visit a psychologist and take tranquilizers, antidepressants or sedatives throughout his life.
Let's look at what manifestations may indicate that individuals are no longer able to independently fight their suspicious state:
- severe irritability
- insomnia, sleep disorders caused by excessive anxiety,
- the appearance of breathing problems,
- depressive state.
Health effects
A suspicious person can harm not only mental but also physical health. The consequence of chronic suspiciousness is a decrease in the production of serotonin - the hormone of happiness, which is necessary for the normal functioning of the body. There is a lack of necessary substances, which leads to poor health. It’s not for nothing that they say that “stress is the cause of all diseases,” because in the future, a stressful state leads to a decrease in immunity, which can lead to exacerbation of chronic diseases. It has been scientifically proven that suspicious people are more susceptible to illness. However, they do not understand that they need to get out of this state in order to cope with problems.
Characteristics of a suspicious person
Such people are easy to recognize by three signs:
- Inadequate self-esteem – in this case, overestimated. Why is that? Because a suspicious person does not trust anyone so much that he has to rely only on himself. Therefore, she is right always, everywhere and in everything. And if you doubt her rightness, then you simply confirm the version that “all people are radishes.”
In fact, the basis of inflated self-esteem is precisely a total lack of self-confidence - in one’s worth as a person. Considering yourself to be the best is a defense mechanism of the psyche from pain that others can cause.
- The problem is in the area of decision-making - anxious people have no right to make mistakes, so making choices and making decisions is very difficult for them.
A mistake for them is a universal catastrophe. “I made a mistake, which means I’m wrong, bad, a failure, a nonentity, a laughing stock,” etc. The desire to be perfect in psychology is called perfectionism (what is it?). - Permanent anxiety accompanies a suspicious individual (who is this?) always and everywhere. How can you not worry if there is danger all around and you have to keep your ears open, calculate your every word, thought, movement?
Are successful people suspicious?
A successful and strong person cannot be a suspicious person. Such a person is confident in himself, thinks positively and is open to everything new. If he has any fear, he immediately drives it away. He doesn't care much about what others say about him, but he takes criticism constructively. Such a person does not engage in self-criticism - self-criticism should be in moderation. If something bothers him, he tries to find out why such a problem occurs, looks for what can be changed in this situation, and tries to fight it. Ultimately, he is more likely to cope with difficulties than a suspicious person.
Do successful people have fears? There definitely is, because fear is necessary for a sense of self-preservation. But a successful person is not obsessed with it - he is not driven into panic by the first disturbing thought, he tries to think constructively and overcome fears, and not be subjected to them.
Self-worth as a way to overcome suspiciousness
When the question arises of how to stop being a suspicious person, you need to sit down and understand the causes of the illness, analyze the life situations that cause fears to constantly resurface inside. Often, having sorted it out, a person understands that people did not wish him harm at all, that everything was far-fetched... Of course, the situation must be considered from all sides. Having realized the groundlessness of suspicions, it is easier to move on, removing from the soul such an ailment as suspiciousness.
If the situation that you are sorting out on the shelves causes pain, then it is better to protect yourself from communicating with the offender, without clarifying any relationship, forbidding yourself to blame him, yourself and anyone else. Just stop communicating and try to live as if there was no offender! The main thing is to stop beating yourself up about the situation, look for the positive, draw conclusions and move on. There is something good to take from every negative situation! And this is important! Life is a school where we learn, improve, and whoever does not live does not make mistakes. It’s okay to make mistakes, but the main thing is to draw conclusions and not repeat mistakes, and you need to stay away from negative people. Let them be left to their own devices with their claims...
How to deal with the disease
To cope with suspiciousness, you need to take concrete steps. Ahead of you are some tips on how to stop being a suspicious person.
They are based on expert advice; for convenience, we present them in the form of a table.
| Advice | What do we have to do |
| Train your success | Develop the best qualities in yourself. Find hidden talents. Think about what has helped you cope with challenges in the past and use those skills. |
| Start valuing yourself | Stop focusing on negative qualities - praise yourself more often and emphasize the positive aspects in yourself. |
| Don't talk bad about yourself | Stop blaming yourself for the slightest failures! A suspicious person does this all the time and only drives himself deeper into his own unrest. It’s better to look at them philosophically and start looking for ways to solve the problems that have arisen. |
| Trust your friends | Friends are people with whom you can safely share your fears, doubts and experiences. You'll see - their support will make things easier. And remember - if the problem is verbalized, the process of solving it has begun. |
| Keep a diary | Write down all your fears, anxieties and experiences during the day - what problem worried you and how you solved it. Maybe in a similar situation you will feel confident. It is quite possible that the diary will make you think about the imaginary nature of many of your fears. |
| Change your habits | It is not at all necessary to change yourself completely, start with little things - walk along a new route, wear clothes of an unusual color, try new food. Small adjustments to your habits can push you towards more global changes. |
| Stay positive | Your sense of self largely depends on how you set yourself up. Smile at yourself, tell yourself good things, encourage yourself. Just program yourself for success, but don’t worry that something won’t work out, because this is a completely normal situation for every person. |
| Massage your earlobes | There are two sensitive points at the top of the ear and in the middle of the earlobe that help cope with anxiety. |
| Laugh off your fears | Laughter works wonders - write your worries honestly on several pieces of paper and place them in different places at home - when you come across them, you will feel very funny about what a suspicious person you really are. |
| Try aromatherapy | Certain essential oils can partially relieve anxiety, the main thing is not to overdo it so that you don’t get a headache. |
| Replace fear with pity | Imagine your fears as pitiful creatures, and you will begin to relate to them differently. For greater clarity, you can draw them. Scare your fear - drive it away, you can imagine a dialogue with it in your head. |
| Find a hobby | A hobby helps anyone, even the most suspicious person, to escape from anxious thoughts. |
| Try auto-training | Self-hypnosis is one of the techniques of autogenic training that has proven itself to be quite effective. |
| Think rationally | To stop being a suspicious person, you don’t need to be subjected to unreasonable states of anxiety; always think critically, then it will be easier to assess the situation. |
Remember that you are able to help yourself get rid of suspiciousness and stop being a suspicious person, the main thing is willpower. These tips can help you cope with constant worry. If you feel that you are unable to get rid of this problem on your own, contact a specialist.
How to get rid of negative thoughts
Suspiciousness turns human life into a gray, dull existence. When there is no peace from negative thoughts, the personality is destroyed. It is impossible to develop harmoniously and comprehensively on a personal level if a person is haunted by obsessive thoughts that interfere with sane thinking.
There are certain psychological techniques that help get rid of bad thoughts. We present 5 recommendations from a psychologist to a suspicious person.
- Technique "Cutting"
- “Label” technique
- Technique "Multiplication"
- Technique "Confrontation"
- Meditation technique
Technique "Cutting"
When negativity begins to creep into a person’s thoughts, you need to sharply cut off the incoming thought, “cut it off with scissors.” Immediately replace the cut off thought with another, positive one. Or a good memory. Instantly switching thoughts, replacing them with positive ones - this is the essence of the technique.
“Label” technique
The essence of the technique is not switching to another thought, but accepting a negative one in the form of observation from the outside. A person notices a bad thought and says: “What is happening to me? Why is this thought here? A person does not get lost in negativity, but simply observes the reaction that occurs to him at that moment.
Technique "Multiplication"
A negative thought that comes to you at the same moment must be magnified to the point of absurdity, to the point of laughter.
For example, fear of a job interview: “They will kick me out of the office when I go for an interview; the employer will decide that I am good for nothing, will ridicule me in front of the team, that I am untalented and no one will hire me, not even as a plumber. On the way home, a pack of stray dogs will attack me and tear my trousers. With a hole in my butt, I will walk through the city and everyone will look at me. At home on TV they will show a video shot by a passer-by with my participation with the caption “loser in holey pants.” Because of this, I will lose my mind and will throw water balloons at passers-by and throw potato peelings at them from the window ... "
Inflate disturbing small trifles to the size of an elephant, catch the thought by the tail and turn it into a joke, then the disturbing situation will be resolved, thereby causing positive thoughts in the person. The person understands that a negative thought is simply ridiculous. You shouldn't focus on it.
Technique "Confrontation"
It consists of completely replacing a negative attitude with a positive one. For example: “I’m not lucky at all, I don’t mean anything in life” replace with “I’m the luckiest person, I mean a lot to myself and people.” Positive thinking decides a lot in life. It is impossible to think negatively and positively at the same time. Therefore, feel free to replace negative thoughts with positive ones, thus depriving negativity of its power to dominate the human mind.
Meditation technique
Distracting the mind from the bad and the good, relaxing the body, focusing the ear on the sounds of the ocean or the singing of birds is a good neutralizer of the flow of negativity that strives to sneak into the human mind.
Not everything is subject to reason. But everything is subject to perseverance. And nothing is impossible for you as long as you live and are free.
Commandment of the 104-year-old sage Andrei Voron
In addition, you can learn about different ways to deal with negative thoughts in this video:
Constant suspiciousness: where does it come from?
There are only two main reasons for increased suspiciousness:
- Low self-esteem , and it doesn’t matter for what reason it was formed.
As psychologists often say: low self-esteem and suspiciousness go together just like low immunity and the flu. If you have poor immunity, then during a standard flu epidemic in winter you will definitely get sick. It’s the same with suspiciousness: if you have problems with self-esteem, then suspiciousness will be one of the main traits of your character.
- Disinclination to analyze the surrounding situation - if for some reason you cannot adequately assess the situation around you, then excessive suspiciousness with or without reason will become your constant companion.
What to do in these cases? In the first, work on yourself and increase your self-esteem, following the advice of experts; in the second, become a bore for a while, that is, analyze every situation from all possible points of view to make sure that nothing threatens you.
The risk group includes children and adolescents, lonely elderly people, as well as adults who have a burden of unresolved youth problems behind them. Suspiciousness can manifest itself in childhood and remain a stable phenomenon throughout a person’s life, worsening in adolescence and old age. According to observations, women are more often suspicious than men.
Psychotherapy in the fight against anxiety
- Instead of negativity, we look for positivity.
- We criticize ourselves in moderation (only one on one with ourselves), only in order not to fall ill with the other extreme - narcissism.
- We don’t talk badly about ourselves in front of people, even as a joke.
- When we get out of bed and go to bed, we give ourselves a positive attitude.
- We force ourselves to smile, even if it costs incredible effort.
- We destroy fears, we can laugh at them.
How to overcome suspiciousness in 17 steps
Below is one of the techniques with which you can cope with suspiciousness yourself. It consists of 17 consecutive steps. So, what is its essence?
| Step | Step Action | Additional measures |
| 1 | Admit the problem | Try to understand the problem. Analyze your behavior. Are you looking for hidden meaning everywhere? Do you always feel like everyone is deceiving you? Do you constantly suspect your loved ones of treason and do not know how to forgive even minor insults? Do you envy other people's opportunities? Do you feel insecure? Answer the questions and compare them with the opinions of people close to you - do they support you or not? |
| 2 | Realize the nature of suspiciousness | Many people confuse suspiciousness with depression, phobias, side effects of medications, panic attacks, and bipolar disorders. If you are already receiving help from a specialist for one of these reasons, tell him about the problem with increased suspiciousness. You shouldn't be ashamed of this. |
| 3 | Talk to your psychiatrist or psychotherapist | Without independent work on yourself, you will not get rid of suspiciousness, but outside help will not be superfluous. This is especially important when suspiciousness has already developed into the stage of paranoia. Realize that people are willing to help you if you allow them to. |
| 4 | Think about why you don't trust people | Write down your feelings. Make notes whenever you think that you have been offended, humiliated, betrayed - try to find the reasons. This way you will calm down and understand what caused your emotions. |
| 5 | Try to think about people differently | Understand that other people live in exactly the same conditions. Put yourself in the other person's shoes, look at the situation through their eyes. Be loyal to other people's mistakes and don't get hung up on everyday situations. |
| 6 | Do not carry past mistakes into the present and future. | Don't let the past influence your life now. Experience, albeit negative, should add wisdom to you when making decisions in the future, but in no way become a burden pulling you to the bottom. Be open to new opportunities. |
| 7 | Stop thinking that everyone is trying to harm you | How to deal with suspiciousness ? Learn to trust yourself, and then the people around you. Loneliness increases when you push people away due to your own mistrust - it's a vicious cycle that needs to be broken. |
| 8 | Learn to control your anger | You can be angry with someone, but don't take your anger out on everyone. |
| 9 | Develop the habit of remaining calm and thinking logically | Try to use common sense and evaluate the situation from a logical point of view. Do not make unfounded assumptions or accusations. |
| 10 | Get your life back on track | Get enough sleep, exercise, eat right - this helps avoid physical and mental exhaustion. Meditation will be a great help. |
| 11 | Stop blaming other people for everything | It is often easier to shift the blame onto someone else than to thoroughly understand the situation - this should not happen. Learn to take all accusations with a grain of salt. |
| 12 | Make an action plan and take action | If you want to defeat a problem, then you need to fight it, that is, act! Make a plan and go ahead! Accept the help of others, do not deprive yourself of friendship, otherwise you will again find yourself alone with your suspiciousness. |
| 13 | Change your behavior and allow yourself to grow. | Work on self-esteem, books and advice from psychologists can help. |
| 14 | Stop being naive | No one owes you anything, understand that success and respect must be earned. |
| 15 | Listen to your feelings, not the opinions of others | Learn to form an opinion about others based on your own judgments, and not on the opinions of strangers. |
| 16 | Stay optimistic | Do what you love, communicate with positive people who can teach you something. Try to take advantage of the opportunities that open before you. |
| 17 | Talk about your problems with others | Talk about your problems, a loved one will help you look at your problem from the outside. |
Peculiarities
Such individuals have many fears and phobias. Even if, with age, they manage to control or hide them, they still remain, and this is a serious problem that needs to be solved. After all, such internal experiences distort and disrupt a person’s socialization and adaptation, which is why the level of social activity decreases.
People who have an anxious-suspicious personality type are not able to refuse. They never try to defend their point of view, do not argue, and speak modestly with people if they are older or occupy a higher level in the social hierarchy. Their personal and professional sphere may suffer due to low resistance to stress and vulnerability.
