Team psychology: rules of relationships with colleagues


Man is a social being and the need for communication stands alongside the need to eat and drink. When communicating with our family and friends, rarely do anyone have problems, because these people surround us from birth, they know our habits, our character, our strengths and weaknesses. Even though we learn how to interact with the people around us from the very first day of our lives, communicating with colleagues at work can be confusing for many. Most often, such a problem arises in a new or young team, however, even a team that has worked together for a long time is not a guarantee of productive and positive communication between employees.

Social psychology of the team

The team at work is a social environment. It consists of many different people. They have different views on life, upbringing, goals for the future and abilities. However, they have to spend some time together and solve common issues. Interaction in this case is a direct path to the success of the company.

A person learns to find a common language with a team from early childhood. First comes kindergarten, then school, then university and, finally, work. And every time you have to adapt to new people. However, this is not always easy to do. As often happens in adulthood, people leave their jobs due to the fact that they do not fit into the team. And such cases are not uncommon.

The relationship between colleagues can be demonstrated with a clear example. Let's say a new employee comes to the company - a young and beautiful girl. What will those who have been working here for a long time experience at this moment? Most likely, there will be interest and, at the same time, tension. An employee can be compared to a foreign body that is at the stage of exploration by the body (in this case, the team). It is examined, studied and evaluated.

People will treat a new person differently. Some people will like the girl for her professional and personal qualities. For others it will irritate and irritate. In both the first and second cases, you will have to put up with the new employee, since relationships in the team as a whole and the activities of the company depend on coordinated work.

Specifics of business etiquette

Each profession and job has its own unique set of rules and requirements for communication between colleagues and with clients. Thus, for kindergarten teachers, one of the fundamental points is the ability to establish contact with children’s parents. Many government organizations (schools, clinics, libraries, etc.) often develop a special code of professional ethics.

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Such a code lists all the main points relating to communication between colleagues, teachers, students, patients, administration, and also puts forward requirements for the appearance, personal characteristics of the employee, and his moral character. Failure to comply with these standards indicates that the employee is not suitable for the position held.

A set of such rules may vary depending on the place of work. The requirements for the behavior and communication of a nurse in the clinic and in the intensive care unit differ. In the latter case, severe demands are placed on the employee’s personality, because she works with people in extremely difficult health conditions, and a disrespectful, callous attitude towards the patient can cost him his life.

Psychology at work and team relationships

The branch of psychology that studies relationships in a team is rightfully considered the most difficult. And this is not surprising, because misunderstandings constantly arise between colleagues. There are several reasons for this state of affairs:

  • doubts about the professional qualities of another person;
  • setups in front of management;
  • gossip and denunciations.

Similar problems happen in every team without exception. You can not only easily get rid of them, but also turn them to your advantage. This requires minimal knowledge of the psychology of communication and relationships with colleagues.

Keep your phone away during conversations and meetings

You may not receive calls, respond to text messages, or view emails during business meetings. This is extremely annoying and shows disrespect for other people present at the meeting.

You should also ensure that you keep your phone on silent while attending meetings, business meetings or conferences. This will give you confidence that a sudden call will not disturb other meeting participants or distract the person speaking.

Types of relationships at work

Relationships with work colleagues vary. They are built according to three main schemes, each of which has its own characteristics, advantages and disadvantages.

Psychology of equal or friendly relationships

This is the closest communication. People praise each other, but will make reprimands if necessary. This type of relationship is not suitable for a manager and one of the employees. And there are reasons for this.

The friendship between the boss and one of the team members sets the latter apart from the rest. He occupies, so to speak, a privileged position, which others will definitely not like. This is a direct path to conflict.

Psychology of relations between elder and younger (from the position of the elder)

This type of relationship at work is divided into two subtypes:

  1. Mentor - student. The first helps the second with advice, but does not guide him in any way, much less participate in his work. A student is unlikely to listen to advice if it comes directly from a boss who is poorly versed in work processes. A mentor gives you the opportunity to improve and move in the right direction.
  2. The leader is a subordinate. The boss evaluates the work of employees, controls it, and, if necessary, punishes or rewards it. Here we are not talking about close relationships, because they will destroy discipline in the team.

It is worth noting that the same person cannot be a leader and a mentor.

Psychology of the relationship between junior and senior (from the position of the junior)

Like the previous type of relationship, this one is divided into subtypes:

  1. The subordinate is the leader. The main task of the first is to take responsibility for his duties and follow the instructions of the second. He also needs to respect the leader, no matter what kind of leader he is.
  2. The student is the mentor. Relationships in a team of this type presuppose that the first one listens to the advice of the second. And he not only listens to them, but thinks about them and tries to put them into practice. If a student argues and refuses to listen to the work mentor, he is not ready to learn. In this case, all conversations are useless.

Each of the listed relationship development schemes makes it possible to build a healthy atmosphere in a team and establish communication.

Basic Rules

Is it necessary to knock on the door of an office due to etiquette? If you enter an office building, there is no need to knock, otherwise you may put the employees behind the door in an awkward position. Knocking will show your suspicions that they may be solving personal problems instead of work ones. You should not knock, but you cannot enter without permission. Open the door, enter the room and ask if you can enter. No need to look out from behind the door. If you are allowed, move on. If you go to your boss’s personal account, you need to ask his secretary for permission. Sometimes bosses express wishes that subordinates should not enter his office without warning them by knocking on the door.

Employees must carefully choose topics for conversation , it is unethical to discuss each other behind each other’s backs and “wash the bones” of the manager.

Do not dry the umbrella unfolded in the middle of the office. Find a secluded place where it won’t disturb anyone, or better yet, hang it on a hanger, after making sure that it won’t bury anyone’s things.

Well-mannered people do not wear outerwear to the office , do not put it on the table or hang it on the back of the chair. All outer clothing must be left in the wardrobe. The exception is if you stopped by for three minutes on an urgent matter.

Rules of good manners

Relationships at work with colleagues should be built according to a few simple rules. The first concerns friendliness. You shouldn’t be rude or rude to others because you’re in a bad mood. Being polite and grateful isn't that hard. These qualities endear people.

However, caution must be exercised here, since close relationships in a team and informal communication can play a cruel joke. For example, a young employee will seem like a rival to women from the team. Men, because of her too free behavior, will consider her flighty and will lose all respect.

The second rule is a logical continuation of the first. You should not tell your work colleagues personal information about yourself. Good intentions and trust easily turn into gossip, speculation and envy. It is enough to tell the generally known minimum.

First day: fatal success

Relationships in a team at work largely depend on the first impression of an employee. He will have to pass a kind of test, the results of which will be the basis for his further communication with colleagues.

So, on your first day of work you need to follow a number of simple recommendations:

  1. Dress as modestly as possible, even if in real life your clothing style can hardly be called modest.
  2. Don't forget about the rules of etiquette. The minimum is a greeting and words of farewell.
  3. Do not flirt with male representatives. This will only ruin relationships with them and with women.
  4. Don't argue trying to prove you're right.
  5. Don't reveal too much about yourself.
  6. If necessary, ask colleagues for help.

It is not difficult to follow these tips. It's enough to just relax and try to enjoy your work.

Features of communication ethics in the business environment

The qualities listed above are, of course, important. But they are not enough to run a successful business. Business etiquette is not only about positive thinking, honesty, and friendliness. This is a whole series of instructions regarding tone, manner of communication, and behavior.

  1. Politeness. An entrepreneur should speak with partners and colleagues in a friendly manner. You also need to smile, since a smile is considered the hallmark of a successful person. Nervousness, panic, and excessive irritability should be excluded.
  2. Correctness. Business etiquette does not recommend being rude, ridiculing your interlocutor, or throwing out your emotions. An ethical person is attentive even to those people who openly dislike him.
  3. Tact. Avoid bringing up awkward or controversial topics in conversation.
  4. Delicacy. In this case, business etiquette implies fluency and flexibility of speech. In particular, this applies to compliments. It is important that they are sincere and also do not turn into open flattery and hypocrisy.
  5. Modesty. A successful businessman never flaunts his merits and achievements. He behaves modestly, thereby emphasizing his good manners and dignity.
  6. Commitment. This instruction applies to both managers and subordinates. All promises made must be kept. This will once again prove that a person is able to soberly assess the situation, calculate time and energy.

Another important quality of a business person is punctuality. There is no room for lateness or inaccuracy in business. Waiting for more than 5 minutes is regarded as a gross violation of business etiquette. This is evidence that a partner or colleague does not value his or other people’s time.

We are so different and yet we are together

Building healthy relationships at work isn't easy. This is due to the fact that each person is individual. There are several types of employees:

  1. Angry or grumpy. Unfriendly people who are always dissatisfied with something and easily lose their temper. For them, every word or reaction of others is an opportunity to throw out negativity. Such people have no desire to talk about good things.
  2. Envious people. The favorite pastime of such team members is spreading gossip, both at work and outside of it. They discuss everything from new lipstick to professional activities. These people are simply bored. When communicating with them, you need to avoid talking too openly about yourself and your family.
  3. Rigid colleagues. They don't like change. Even if the new one is many times better than the old one, they will not change anything. Relations with such employees should be based on strict adherence to established rules and instructions.
  4. Advisers. They constantly teach those around them, giving out advice left and right. They are harmless. The worst thing that their behavior leads to is a quarrel at work. When communicating with colleagues of this type, you need to take the initiative and ask for advice first.
  5. Pedants. React to the slightest inaccuracies and details. It is quite easy to moderate their ardor. It is enough to shift some of the responsibilities that require great attention and scrupulousness.
  6. Artists. They love to be the center of attention. Scandals at work are a way for them to recharge their energy. A couple of compliments and attention will turn them from enemies into allies.

How to make deals

1. Define clearly what the subject of the transaction is.

2. Decide what is important to you and what is not.

3. Be able to explain why it's important.

4. Have a Plan B so you don't feel too pressured.

5. Give the other side an opportunity to begin negotiations.

6. Try to come to a decision together.

7. When concluding a deal, make sure that the interests of both parties are respected.

8. Once the size of the deal has been determined, end the discussion.

What can provoke colleagues into conflicts?

According to psychology books, healthy relationships in a team are sometimes threatened. There are many reasons for this:

  • unsociability, reluctance to make contact;
  • complaints and denunciations against colleagues;
  • bad mood spilling out on others;
  • excessive self-confidence and straightforwardness;
  • fear of overworking;
  • comparison of former work with current one;
  • excessive curiosity towards colleagues;
  • loud conversations on the phone, elevated tone when communicating with others, strong aroma of perfume.

Another reason for a possible conflict lies in workaholism. Sometimes the desire to do quality work is perceived from the outside as a desire to curry favor with management or stand out from the crowd.

Crossing your legs should be avoided

Crossing your legs in a business environment or during a meeting is highly inappropriate. Although both men and women tend to do this very often. However, this position should be avoided at all costs.

If for some reason you really need to cross your legs, it is important to make sure that the crossing occurs at the ankles and not the knees. Experienced businessmen or simply professional managers know that crossing legs or arms is a signal indicating that a person simply does not want to continue communication or does not agree with the opinions of others. But why give others the opportunity to read themselves by gestures, like an open book? It is better not to compromise yourself with your own behavior and maintain restraint in any situation.

Relationships in a men's team: let's set priorities

In a male team, as well as in a female team, conflicts often occur. There are several ways to prevent them:

  1. Always look perfect. The best clothes for work are a formal business suit.
  2. Extra attention from colleagues or even flirtatiousness surprises and baffles. There is no need to be rude in response. It is better to remain silent or move the conversation to another topic.
  3. It is worth remembering that each member of the team is an employee like everyone else. Therefore, demanding special treatment for yourself is not nice.
  4. Do not react to provocations too emotionally. It is important to remain calm even in cases where emotions are brought out on purpose. This requires resilience.

The most important thing is to show respect to all colleagues at work without exception. We can say that this is the key to a good relationship.

The pointing sign should be made with an open palm

The pointing gesture is often used in a business environment. It can be used by a person when he wants to draw the attention of listeners to something (to a graph, to a document, to a table, etc.) or to point to someone. As a rule, the second option is used most often by senior staff or senior managers.

No matter what connotation this gesture has, it should be done so that the index finger is pointing at the object, the other fingers are not pressed against the palm, and the palm itself is open upward. This way, the pointing gesture will be softer and will not cause bad associations.

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