3 reasons and 4 methods to get rid of the fear of looking people in the eyes


Everyone knows what a fussily averted gaze indicates. A person who is afraid to look into the eyes of his interlocutor or a random passerby does not give the impression of a strong and self-sufficient person - on the contrary, he looks weak, timid and unsure of himself. According to psychologists, the fear of looking into the eyes is closely related to the fear of communicating with people (social phobia), and its development is due to anxiety about the assessments and opinions of others. The fear of making eye contact is sometimes called ommatophobia, a disorder characterized by fear of the eyes.

Getting rid of the phobia of looking into the eyes: techniques

Why do people avoid looking directly into the “mirror of the soul” of their interlocutor? Looking away in a communicative situation is almost always interpreted as a sign of self-doubt.

On a subconscious level, a person understands: when they look at him, he is being evaluated. The fear of appearing weak and not meeting the expectations of our negotiating partner makes us look away. At the same time, we often lose sight of the fact that we are on equal terms with the interlocutor and are also an observer and evaluator.

you get rid of ommetaphobia - this is what fear of the eyes is called in psychology:

1. Look in the mirror often

Make a visual connection with your reflection every day. To enhance the effect, you can even tell yourself a story without taking your eyes off your own reflection.

2. Work on your voice

Oddly enough, by giving your intonation more confidence, you will be able to better withstand the gaze of your interlocutor. If your voice is quiet in a conversation, give it more volume and firmness.

3. Get rid of far-fetched complexes

The human imagination tends to inflate almost any phobia to cosmic proportions. Know how to shake off unnecessary worries when communicating with others. Their plans do not always include the desire to humiliate you or subject you to their influence.

4. Study the relevant literature

It would be a good idea to take advice from professionals on how to master the art of visual interaction. Advice gleaned from such books can be very useful in the future.

Treatment

Fear of eye contact, fear of ridicule is a serious phobia that needs to be treated. Unfortunately, since this disorder is tied to internal complexes and a pathological sense of shame, a person cannot cope with the phobia on his own. To overcome the fear of staring into the eyes, scopophobe must find the strength to go to a psychotherapist.

A psychologist will not help in this case; the patient needs a psychotherapist or psychiatrist, since potent drugs are needed to reduce symptoms.

You can overcome any fears yourself, but only by gaining the ability to think critically, and this is what the fear of other people’s views deprives you in the first place. In other words, you need to start therapy with a doctor, but you can continue treatment on your own.

Drug treatment

Treatment begins with a course of medications, and only then psychotherapy is prescribed

Scopophobia is one of those phobias that can be treated with medication. This is due to the fact that it is one of the forms of social neuroses that negatively affect a person’s mental state. Neurosis is a mental disorder that occurs against the background of overstrain of the nervous system.

Tranquilizers are used to treat anxiety disorder with scopophobia. Drugs in this group are available only by prescription, so they must be prescribed by a psychotherapist. If scopophobia is accompanied by depressive symptoms, antidepressants are prescribed.

Psychotherapy

After short-term drug therapy, a course of psychotherapy is indicated for people with fear of other people's views. The most effective method is cognitive-behavioral psychocorrection. At a doctor's appointment, the patient learns to look at others from a different angle and not see any passerby as a potential danger. This method of therapy helps to change your attitude towards the problem, which then allows you to get rid of the phobia on your own. In other words, a person stops focusing on the subject of fear (in this case, other people’s views, criticism and possible ridicule), as a result, the phobia goes away on its own.

Another effective treatment method is Gestalt therapy. In the case of scopophobia, the method allows us to identify hidden childhood causes of self-doubt and pathological feelings of shame. Despite the fact that this method is often criticized by doctors, many patients respond positively to Gestalt therapy in the treatment of phobias.

How to Make Eye Contact

Full communication between people is impossible without tuning into the desired “wave.” To do this, you need to learn to look your interlocutor in the eyes and not feel shy.

Experts have developed a special system that will help cope with awkwardness and master the science of “eye” communication. Here are the main steps of this complex:

1. Relaxation

How to make eye contact with your opponent? First of all, you need to let go of the constraining tension. Unnecessary worries only prevent you from concentrating on the words of your interlocutor. You can relax in two ways:

• using special breathing techniques;

• calmly listening to what the person talking to us says.

2. Con method

Constantly “jumping” from one eye of the interlocutor to the other can lead to serious confusion during communication. Something similar can be seen in particularly tense movie scenes, when the characters look at each other and their pupils frantically dart from side to side.

To prevent this from happening, choose one of your opponent's eyes to focus on and concentrate on it throughout the conversation.

3. Find a place of “refuge” for your gaze.

It is extremely difficult to keep your gaze in one place for a long time, so take care about where you place your eyes when communicating. This could be the eyebrow, bridge of the nose, or eyelid of the interlocutor. Rest assured: for the contactee such “travels” will go unnoticed.

4. Gesticulation

If you are an emotional person, in a conversation you constantly reinforce what is said with hand movements. This is a very good way to take your eyes off the other person's eyes for a while.

Symptoms of scopophobia

A person with scopophobia most wants to avoid other people's attention to themselves.

Fear of other people's views manifests itself in different ways, but leaves an imprint on a person's behavior in any situation.

  1. A person with this disorder lives with a constant feeling of shame. He is ashamed of the fact that he may do something wrong in the future, which will entail condemnation and ridicule of others.
  2. Due to a constant feeling of shame, people with scopophobia often blush, hide their gaze, prefer monosyllabic answers and never engage in conversation themselves.
  3. Scopophobes are characterized by suspiciousness. It seems to them that everyone around them knows the reasons for this behavior and secretly laughs.
  4. Inattention and absent-mindedness are typical traits of scopophobes. People with this disorder focus on themselves, their behavior and feelings, but not on the interlocutor. This is done in general in order to avoid “mistakes” when communicating.

During periods of strong emotional experiences or stress, the phobia may worsen. In addition to the symptoms listed above, panic attacks appear that occur when being in public or communicating with a stranger. At the same time, scopophobe feels panic and a desire to hide, his fingers tremble, his back is covered with cold sweat, his heart rate accelerates and severe shortness of breath appears. In some cases of scopophobia, the patient may literally cover his eyes with his hand, avoiding the gaze of others.

Fear of other people's views

In addition to the fear of direct eye contact, some people suffer from the fear of being under the scrutiny of others. This mental disorder goes hand in hand with such an anomaly as anthropophobia.

It may seem to a person that everyone around him has conspired to make fun of his appearance or the way he behaves. This is why panic arises before making visual contact with the interlocutor. An individual who is possessed by the fear of other people's views is sure that in the eyes of his opponent he will find nothing but poisonous ridicule and contempt.

In a conversation, such a person experiences hellish torment, his heart jumps out of his chest and his forehead is covered with sweat. He can’t wait to end the conversation and be left alone with himself. If the problem is neglected, you can end up with a complete social phobe who is horrified at the mere thought of having to communicate with people.

You can overcome the fear of other people's views by gaining one hundred percent self-confidence. You should expand your circle of acquaintances and be in friendly, friendly companies as much as possible. Healing will not be easy, but if successful, it will be possible to forever forget about the barrier that interferes with the full self-realization of the individual.

Don't be afraid to look into your eyes

Remember: properly established eye contact is half the success in communication. It is not necessary to have extra abilities to learn how to adequately withstand the gaze of your interlocutor. Just be confident in yourself. Victory to you on the communication front!

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Reasons for the development of phobia and its manifestations

Fear of the eyes can be a consequence of the costs of upbringing, childhood psychotrauma, and trauma in adulthood. Sometimes it accompanies other pathologies:

  • epilepsy;
  • Tourette's syndrome;
  • neuroses;
  • social phobia;
  • agoraphobia;
  • anxiety disorder;
  • other mental disorders.

With epilepsy, a person becomes ill in crowded places, for example, when answering in class at the blackboard or when visiting a supermarket. With Tourette's syndrome, at a time when many people are looking at a person, it is accompanied by stuttering and a nervous tic. With neuroses, the symptoms of phobia worsen in stressful situations.

Other reasons for the development of a phobia:

  • overprotection in the family;
  • total control by parents;
  • nagging and bullying, ridicule at school;
  • reproaches and criticism from parents.

Sometimes just one traumatic situation is enough to form a stable fear. For example, a person failed a public speech or found himself in another awkward situation in front of a large crowd of people.

A person with scopophobia has distinctive behavioral characteristics:

  • chronic feeling of shame;
  • redness when talking;
  • the desire to look away, hide your gaze;
  • monosyllabic answers;
  • avoiding conversations;
  • suspiciousness;
  • absent-mindedness;
  • inattention.

Scopophobes will never start a conversation first. When interacting with people, they are concerned about themselves, making sure that they do not make mistakes. Because of this, they do not pay attention to the interlocutor, his condition, words, interests.

Somatic manifestations of phobia:

  • tremor of the limbs;
  • chills;
  • sweating;
  • cold sweat down the back;
  • tachycardia;
  • dyspnea;
  • chest pain;
  • dry mouth;
  • increase in pressure.

The patient may have a panic attack, during which he covers his face with his hands and runs away as far as possible. In this state, he may hit other people or run under a car. Sometimes patients behave aggressively towards those people who supposedly laugh at them.

It is important! In advanced stages of the phobia, a panic attack can begin immediately when a person leaves the house or when meeting a new person.

Mirror of the Soul ↑

Psychological science examines various factors that contribute to the recognition of a person’s character and behavior:

  • facial expressions;
  • gestures;
  • gait;
  • facial features;
  • rate of speech, etc.

But the most informative source remains the eyes and gaze. Ancient treatises on the study of physiognomic features call for the study of human eyes.

The child does not want to share his experiences? Learn techniques for identifying teenage angst. Are you tormented by constant anxiety and fear? Find out what to do in the article.

It is believed that not only positive, but also negative energy is transmitted through the eyes. Scientific research mostly boils down to studying the openness of the gaze, its direction and movements.

The dangers of scopophobia and ommatophobia

Ommatophobia is sometimes considered as a fear of damage or the evil eye. If a person believes in mysticism and is afraid of it, then he can resort to protective rituals. Because of which he may become a victim of scammers. Scopophobia is dangerous because it turns into social phobia and leads to isolation.

Both phobias prevent a person from self-realization and self-development. The patient loses friends, work, and cannot build a personal life. Constant tension leads to the development of secondary disorders and somatic diseases.

Reasons for development

Situations and personality traits that can cause the development of a phobia:

  1. Frequent illnesses in childhood. Children who are often sick and miss classes find themselves cut off from the team. Weak children or children from dysfunctional families often become outcasts. Their self-esteem decreases, complexes and fear of being ridiculed are formed.
  2. Comparing the child with other children. Some parents compare their child with more successful, obedient, exemplary children, in their opinion. They reproach and criticize their offspring, humiliate him, thereby forming complexes and lowering the child’s self-esteem.
  3. Dependence on other people's opinions. Insecure people who are used to relying on others or living to please others are afraid of doing something wrong, disappointing someone, letting them down. More often we are talking about one or two close people, for example, about the fear of disgracing parents.
  4. Excessive self-criticism and inferiority complex. Such people constantly compare themselves with others. They are confident that they are worse than others in everything, and they are afraid that someone will notice this, expose them, and laugh at it.

Fear of the eyes, phobia of the eyeball can arise due to personal fears, injuries related to the eyes. This is especially painful for fearful, insecure people. Some people are afraid of the so-called black eye, that is, damage. In this case, the person’s suspiciousness and uncertainty are to blame.

Fear of doll eyes or fear of toy eyes can be caused by watching horror movies. If we are talking about the doll's moving eyes, then this may be due to the fear of closed eyes. Which, in turn, is associated with death.

Some people have a fear of closing their eyes, for example, in the shower or on public transport. This is due to suspiciousness and mistrust. Some are afraid of monsters, some are afraid of other people. The reason for this must be sought in personality traits. For example, the reason may be violent fantasy and suggestibility, which, in combination with watching a horror film, could result in trauma. Another reason is childhood psychotrauma. For example, a child was abused while he was sleeping.

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