Hi all! Today we'll talk about sociability. As you know, man is a social being. This means that he will not be able to fully develop without communication. At each age stage, a person learns to communicate, perceive and transmit information. Scientists have proven that even inside the mother, the child hears her speech and reacts to it. Today, the problem of high-quality, pleasant and interesting communication worries many. Every person wants to be interesting and appreciated, but sometimes we all have to experience embarrassment and difficulties in communication. Below we will figure out how to become a sociable and interesting person so that our interlocutors want to continue communicating with us.
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A few tips: how to become a simple girl
As a rule, it is girls who are more prone to self-examination. It is unlikely that you will meet a young man who will sit and discuss with friends what he did, how he did it, why and what would have happened if he had acted differently. Therefore, it is girls who are in greater need of advice that will help them perceive life around them as it is, and not think about the topic “If only.”
The first thing you need to realize is that there are things in life that have happened, are happening and will happen regardless of whether you want them to happen or not. Such events include, for example, death. And advice from friends like “Forget it!”, “Everything will pass!”, “Don’t pay attention to it” will not work here. Each person himself must realize that he is unable to change anything and that what happened was what had to happen. And then it will be easier for you to accept what happened and the question “How can it be simpler?” will disappear on its own.
To perceive life more simply, it is very important not to be nervous for no reason and not to attach great importance to minor problems and troubles. There is so much going on in the modern world that it is simply unreasonable to waste your nerves and time on trivial events and minor failures. In this case, it is important to simply accept what happened and learn from it, which will help you avoid the same mistakes in the future. In search of an answer to the question “How to become simpler?” It is important to approach everything in life philosophically.
Get simpler
Are you sure that you know almost everything in the world, and you are unlikely to discover anything new? Believe me, you are wrong! You should not arrogantly extol the knowledge, abilities and even talents you already have. Don't look at life from a selfish perspective.
Learn to admit your mistakes. Start helping others. Find yourself a hobby in an area of life that you have never even thought about before: study the culture of some little-known tiny country, scuba dive, understand prehistoric cuneiform writing, become a participant in a fire show!
You can’t even imagine how many interesting things there are that you don’t know for sure! Surprise yourself first before you start trying to impress others.
Four simple tips to become a simple person
Many people often hear the phrase “keep it simple,” but what does that really mean? For different people, different degrees of this “simpler” were acceptable. For a famous movie star, this means having dinner in an ordinary cafe; for a popular millionaire, this means wearing ordinary clothes and walking around the city on foot, and not in an expensive car. Therefore, when you hear the famous phrase “be simpler, and people will be drawn to you,” the question involuntarily arises: how to become a simple and open person to whom everyone is drawn? After all, often people who say this phrase do not give any advice on how exactly to do this.
No to arrogance
As a rule, to become that very standard of “simplicity”, you just need to get rid of your arrogance. Every girl, thinking about how to become simple, also needs to think about her pride. Very often this is the reason why you are advised to be simpler. If you really notice a sin in yourself in the form of excessive arrogance, then you should just take a little break from yourself and spend time with the people around you. Learn to think about others, have compassion and empathy for them.
But be sure to take into account who exactly wants to make it easier for you. If these are not the most exemplary people, then it is better to remain with your opinion and your so-called pride. Maybe these people are just jealous of you, so carefully filter the various “well-wishers”.
Watch your affections
Life will not be simple unless you let go of your attachments. If you are attached to old memorabilia, you will not be able to free your home from junk; if you are attached to constant activity and correspondence, you are at risk of information overload and fatigue.
Track your attachments and find out what you can’t get rid of, what you can’t let go of. Whether it's things, people or things, remember that if you don't let them go, you won't get freedom and life will always be too difficult.
Friendliness and sociability are your best friends
Many people by “simplicity” mean kindness, sociability and openness. This situation is radically different from the previous one. In this case, the matter concerns people who are withdrawn and closed to themselves, and not proud and self-confident. It is not always possible to immediately understand how to be a simple person to whom everyone is drawn. Try to make new acquaintances and communicate more with others. Indecision and lack of self-confidence very often push people away. Perhaps by becoming more sociable and open, you will achieve that very desired level of “simplicity”.
Don't be afraid to try new things
Read as much as possible, watch, look as closely as possible at small details and nuances, test new ideas. The more information a person absorbs - verbal, figurative, visual, sensory - the more he can give it out.
Drive away the feeling of anxiety and worry, do not let it completely take over you. Overcome your own embarrassment. Take part in the karaoke competition, even if the bear danced on both your ears! Try yourself in different areas of life. Only you yourself can take small steps towards an extraordinary and interesting life.
Loving yourself means treating others well too.
Compliance with this point is the main criterion in finding the answer to the question: “How to become a simple person?” And in fact, this is very difficult, especially for born proud people who do not think about anyone but themselves. Not everyone can do good deeds, but everyone can try not to do anything bad. Treat people the way you would like to be treated. This proverb couldn't come at a better time. After all, no person would do something to harm themselves, so why do many allow themselves to do unpleasant things to others?
Being yourself means being happier
Before you learn how to become simple, it's important to think about what makes you happy. Maybe your job does not bring you pleasure, and you like to write poetry or take care of plants in the country. Or do you like to dance, sing, draw. Just do what brings you joy more often, because then you will feel happier. In moments of joy, you will want to make everyone around you happy, and this is what will make you a simple and open person.
Following these tips will make you self-confident and teach you to look positively at the world and everything that happens in it. Then you will become a truly kind, open and simple person to whom others will be drawn.
Fight the habit of getting distracted
We are used to being constantly distracted, interrupting our activities and feeling terribly busy. When talking with a person, we switch to messages in instant messengers. When we travel, we step out of reality to take more new photos and post them on social networks. We are distracted by phone notifications and empty conversations, and if there are none, by our thoughts, memories and fears. All this makes it difficult to concentrate on the present moment and enjoy it.
But it is important to understand that this is not a character trait or a feature of the brain, but just a bad habit that you can get rid of with effort.
Society's advice on how to become simple
Many children are taught from childhood to behave in such a way that others will approve of their behavior. And this is the mistake of many parents. They attach too much importance to public opinion.
Of course, family and friends criticize us only with good intentions, but not everyone is able to accept and objectively evaluate this criticism. Therefore, most likely, it will do more harm to a person than good. Listen to the advice and recommendations of your family, but do as your heart tells you. After all, it is never wrong. Act honestly, be sincere and open, because this is precisely the simplicity that everyone strives for.
Remember that no one knows your positive and negative sides as well as you do. And if you're really thinking about how to become simple, don't waste your time thinking about what your friend said out of envy or your mom blurted out in a fit of anger. Don’t be offended by your loved ones, always think that they still wish you well in any situation. And you shouldn’t complicate your life and theirs because of a few offensive phrases.
What to do when they say “keep it simple” - be?
Therefore, there is no need to be simpler if your heart resists it.
Life is simpler
People who constantly try to simplify their lives (and in fact make it easier for those around them) live in some ways easier. They can communicate with people they find unpleasant (“meeting the right people will help in life”), be content with little (“a bad husband is better, but at least like this”), but sooner or later protest will grow within them. The constant desire to be simpler for the benefit of others will lead to neurosis or simply a permanent state of dissatisfaction with one’s own life. Remember: if they tell you to be simpler, then they want to make life easier for themselves, not for you.
Surprisingly, even financial well-being (for the sake of which, by the way, many become “simpler,” ignore their own desires and endure oppression) does not guarantee happiness. Not in terms of being able to buy anything and everything, but in terms of inner, true happiness. Even with wealth, you may not see, hear or feel the simple joys in life. So maybe it’s time to think about it when they say: “Keep it simple.” Think about it and start living by your own rules.
If a complex person does not want to become simpler
A person with his inner oddities owes nothing to anyone but himself. He says: “I don’t want to be simpler!” – and he does the right thing. In the process of life, everyone accumulates experience, develops their own habits and little joys. Only for a complex (by standard standards) person, all this is formed in accordance with his desires (emotions, principles), but for a person adapting to society, experiences, habits and joys will be dictated by someone else.
Read on: Is this the goal you really need?
If you don't want to be simpler, there is no need to be afraid. By going against the grain, you will find many hidden benefits. A common situation is when friends try to drink a lot of alcohol to have fun. You drink socially, then you get sick, you often don’t remember how you behaved, but you don’t refuse, lest you hear something like: “Don’t you respect us?” Try to give up such activities temporarily, preferring to watch a good movie, take a walk in the fresh air, or visit your beloved grandmother. Believe me, you will get much more positive emotions compared to a headache, a hangover and a terrible reluctance to go to work after a party. Do you need to become simpler if such “simplification” goes against your actual desires?
When is it better to “become simpler”?
So, as we found out, you shouldn’t be simpler on someone’s advice. But you also shouldn’t over-excite yourself by coming up with unnecessary complications. This applies, for example, to those cases when some kind of trouble has happened in life. After thinking about it a little, learn to simply let go of the situation, without allowing the thoughts in your head to drive you into a frenzy. Let's say your long-time friend committed an act that made your further communication with him impossible. Naturally, there is little pleasant, but life goes on, maybe there is no need to dramatize? If a person did not value your relationship, then he has no place in your heart? Perhaps there are a lot of new and interesting personalities around who will only add color to your life.
In other words, you need to look at your own problems more simply, learning to move forward without wallowing in despondency. Let go of your failures, forget grievances, but not in order to be more convenient for someone. Only to look for a lot of interesting things in the new day without looking back at the past day. Speak more boldly: “I don’t want to be simpler!” - make mistakes, search, love your inner strangeness, live and listen to your inner self. As a rule, it does not deceive.
Is attention to detail really necessary?
When asking the question “How to become simple and open?”, think about how much time you spend on something that, in fact, is not worthy of even a minute of your life. Attention to detail is only necessary in work, but in all life situations it will only bring you problems. Thus, you simply complicate your life with various rules and conditions that would not exist if you accepted everything that happens as it is. There is no need to replay events in your head, think about all the little things and think about how you could act in a given situation. Believe me, this will not lead to anything good. Just enjoy life, do what you like, become happier and make everyone around you happy.
Breathe deeply!
Relax. Calm down. You are not now running a race with yourself; there is no judge standing at the finish line, counting every second. You are not a marathon runner, not a participant in sports competitions, and you have every right to rest. Otherwise, you definitely won’t make it to the finish line. Find a soothing melody for yourself and merge with the music, dissolve in it. Listen to your breathing, even it out, feel the waves of warmth and peace spreading throughout your body. Learn to relax and imagine that you are already in your desired future. What is it like? And what feelings do you experience? Blend with your successful self.
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The debate between the mind and the heart
Very often, many girls are faced with situations where the heart tells one thing, but common sense and experience say something else. Almost always, such a dispute between the mind and heart arises due to constant analysis and reflection on the situation. You try to take into account all the little things so as not to miss anything, but in the end you miss something very important. Sometimes it is worth listening to your heart and intuition, taking risks and, perhaps, finding the greatest happiness in life. You don’t need to listen to the advice of others and do what they think is right if you feel that you don’t want to. There is nothing worse than regretting something you didn't do. Follow your desires, be happy, and you will not notice how you will become the very ideal of simplicity that everyone is drawn to.
Where do communication problems come from?
Communication problems do not just arise; they mature in the child’s psyche starting from childhood. In the family, he sees how the parents act, how they communicate, and repeats after them. If the child’s feelings were not taken into account, he was not heard, a lot was decided for him, he will already be prepared for difficulties in communications.
When a child enters society, it also influences the development of communication. Along with this, self-esteem also develops. If even an adult finds himself in an unfamiliar situation, where he is very different from the group in social and financial status, and the group will greatly influence him, his self-esteem will be shaken. What can we say about the child?
Developing in an unfavorable environment, communication difficulties are reinforced, resulting in an insecure person with communication problems. Such an interlocutor realizes himself as inept in communication and insecure and withdraws from reality into the Internet, alcohol and other bad habits.
Main problems in communication:
- I don’t know what topic to discuss with my interlocutor;
- I want to be friends or date a girl/boyfriend, but I don’t know how to achieve this;
- I don’t know how to defend myself and defend my opinion in disputes and conflicts.
Many turn to psychologists with requests: how to stop being shy, learn to communicate, and be confident. These problems can be solved; it is important to understand yourself, your characteristics and difficulties, then look for ways out of a difficult situation in communication.
Reviews
Many girls and boys have already tried to adhere to the tips and recommendations described above. They all leave positive reviews about this technique. Most of them claim that as soon as they began to change, the attitude of all the people around them immediately changed, and it became easier to make new acquaintances. You just have to start with yourself, and the whole world will meet you halfway.
