Most mature adults ask questions about their purpose. The prerequisites for this are unrealized ideas and the hidden potential of a person, “suppressed” by parents in childhood. What to do with your life? Any child will easily answer this question that he, for example, wants to become an astronaut or a military man, and an adult, in turn, will be confused and will not be able to give an affirmative answer. This is due to the fact that children have a more clear idea of what they want from life.
Diffidence
Constant barriers that stand between a person and his goal in the form of doubts and uncertainty provoke suppression of the desire to realize his unrealized potential. “Will I be able to? What if I don’t succeed?” Sometimes the cultivation of insecurity occurs at the stage of growing up, where the individual first encounters failures, misunderstandings and lack of support from loved ones. Doubts about one’s own abilities significantly impede not only the implementation of plans, but also a person’s personal growth.
Where to look for motivation?
If after a long search you feel only melancholy and fatigue, you haven’t searched well or you don’t need a new activity at all. Sometimes a person needs discussions about finding himself in this life to attract attention or to explain to others his inaction: they say, well, I have talent, it’s just that no one appreciates it, everything now is only through connections.
Motivation and inspiration will come as you work, when you realize that you can achieve your goals and work towards them every day. Start small!
Features of the educational process
All our successes and failures, addictions, fears and dreams come from childhood. Most parents, not listening to the wishes of their children, instill skills and abilities that are completely unusual for them. For example, a child, when asked “What do you want to do in life?” answers that he wants to be an artist. His answer is perceived by his parents as something unrealistic, something that will not bring any material wealth or career growth. As a result, the child encounters complete misunderstanding on the part of adults, and his potential becomes unrealized.
However, there are also cases when parents try to organize their child’s leisure time as much as possible, forcing him to develop comprehensively. Of course, an adult who has knowledge about various fields of activity will be able to achieve a lot, but in most cases the person still does not know what to do in life, how to find himself, since he forgets his initial desires and aspirations.
Finding yourself
Every day, from children to elderly people, they wonder how to find their place in life? Just because a person is self-confident and successful does not mean that he has no problems finding his purpose. Psychology claims that these questions, if such questions arise in a person, then with a high degree of probability they will arise again.
What does it mean to find yourself? If you look at this from the side of philosophy, then the understanding of finding yourself in life is the search for some unique place of stay where the knowledge of the inner self occurs. Psychology claims that spending a long time searching for oneself is a manifestation of depression. If your search becomes too obsessive and no longer brings pleasure, it is better to seek help from a psychotherapist. In some situations, these circumstances indicate the need for rest. Since, often, a person has already found himself, but due to excessive fatigue and increasing stress, he is in doubt mode, and in order to get rid of it, he needs to reboot with the help of rest and emotional relaxation.
While finding oneself, a person enjoys not only obtaining a result, but also the very process of searching for it. There is no universal way to search, but this is good, because this is what makes the process so attractive. I don’t want to make the mistake of giving advice on finding your self, so I suggest, in addition to my advice, to find other consultations, master classes, trainings, and so on on the Internet on this topic that can simplify your task.
Environment
Stewardship, a kind of herd instinct, sometimes blinds a person to his true capabilities and abilities. For example, several people from close circles enter the same college/institute/university and pull the person along with them. With certain personal qualities, he will not be able to resist. The result of learning without much desire, and so, “What should I do in life in order to regain satisfaction from my own activities?” But he does not find an answer, because his “I” has already deeply hidden the capabilities and talents of a person, so as not to resist his choice.
The purpose of life
It’s all about the desire to achieve success, get an education and a favorite, decent job.
However, these are not all the goals that modern people strive for. Much depends on personal preferences, aspirations, tastes, values and even upbringing. For example, in an intelligent family they try to give their children a higher education, teach them languages, and bring them out into the world. In middle-class society, parents strive to instill in their offspring work skills, but higher education is also a priority.
Even the lower classes will never refuse to reach a higher level. But it’s all about habits and lifestyle. By the way, dysfunctional parents may set high goals for themselves, but due to their illiteracy and lack of willpower, they never achieve their goals or desires. However, looking at a negative example, their offspring often rethink the situation and try to get out of the vicious circle.
In achieving goals it is important:
- Knowledge.
- Motivation.
- The desire to move forward.
Not everyone can find themselves in life, but everyone can do it - this is what psychologists say.
After all, in the modern world there are so many opportunities and diverse projects. You need to try different directions. And then someone will be able to make a great movie, another will be able to cure a friend or loved one, and a third will be able to earn decent money, become an excellent musician or create a wonderful collection of clothes.
A person can find meaning in life only by devoting himself to society. Albert Einstein
How to treat pragmatists: criticize them or consider them an example to follow?
Stereotypes
Each person has his own opinion about what happiness should be. But some agree on one thing: a happy person is one who has achieved everything in life, who lives without denying himself anything. People’s stereotypes have so developed that without material wealth, no one can consider themselves successful and accomplished. In this regard, a person, in his desire to understand what to do in life, more often strives to get rich, to become someone whose material possibilities are practically limitless, rather than to develop spiritually. No, this is not bad at all, but it is worth considering that money cannot bring full release of potential, since each of us is individual. For example, a person who is more inclined to creativity (drawing, singing, playing musical instruments, and so on) is often not endowed with a certain commercial spirit, which nullifies all his attempts to achieve material well-being.
// Take risks
Sometimes you can't decide whether to take advantage of a chance or not. So - yes, it’s worth it.
If a person had not clicked a stone against a stone or had not tasted the berries, our lives would have turned out differently. As soon as you use one opportunity, another one immediately appears.
That is why try to get another job, open your own business, participate in a volunteer program or go to work in Singapore
There is only one life - try it!
How to find yourself. Practical advice
“What do I want to do with my life?” The problem with this issue is that not everyone is able to sort out their own desires and dreams. Most people lack specificity in defining purpose. Most often this is due to urgent needs, the satisfaction of which comes first. Here, an adult can be compared with a teenager, guided by the desires and preferences of parents, relatives and friends. What is the best thing to do in life - the answer lies in the subconscious of each individual; for this you need to ask yourself motivational questions:
- What values are prerogative in your life (no more than three)?
- Achieving what goals is important to you at the moment (no more than three)?
- What do you like to do?
- What would you like to do if you found out that you have six months to live?
- What is your most cherished dream that was not realized due to fear of failure?
- Where would you spend a large amount of money won from the lottery/lotto/poker?
- What dream would you pursue if you were 100% sure of success?
Summary
Let's take stock and decide what exactly needs to be done in order to have a convincing answer to the question “what do I really want from life?”
- Describe your vision for your life as a filmmaker. Decide what kind of movie you want to make, make a life storyboard of six frames on one sheet. Imagine a “trailer” of your life, or better yet, make it from drawings or edited photographs. Create your life like a movie.
- Start keeping a diary/memoir. Write down the most emotionally significant events of the day, week, year and the values with which these events are associated. Distribute these values on a separate sheet according to their weight in your life.
- Ask yourself the question “Why?” often until you get the ultimate answer. Write down your ultimate answers in a diary or notepad. Build a hierarchy out of them.
- State your personal mission in one sentence. Give a brief answer to the question, why did you come into this world and what will you leave behind? Write an obituary about yourself.
- Make a shopping list for 5 million euros. Write down the needs that these purchases satisfy.
- Write a list of 100 dreams. Dream regularly, make your dreams come true and complement them. Collect it all in one document. Call it the Charter of Ivan Ivanov (or whatever your name is). Print it out. Accept it, approve it with your painting. You can download the charter template from this link.
- Be sure to include points 1-6 in your plan. Set yourself the task “Create a Personal Charter” with a deadline of “until such and such a date.” Until you have it at least in draft form, consider that your problem is not solved.
- Review your Charter periodically so as not to forget what you really want, refer to it in moments of uncertainty. If necessary, amend it, publish new versions and re-adopt it.
I took some of the ideas for this article from the book “Time Management. Full course." You can purchase its electronic version on Litres. I believe that personal effectiveness should begin with this book and precisely with the steps that I gave you in this article.
I am confident that if you have a Personal Charter based on these exercises, you will know exactly what you want from life. With such a foundation, you can set the most ambitious goals and achieve amazing results. I will write about how to correctly set goals, plan plans and achieve results in one of the following articles on this blog. In order not to miss it, subscribe to the channel on Telegram and VKontakte.
PS : I hope this article was helpful to you and solved your problem. If so, share it with your friends on social networks by clicking the buttons below. I will be grateful to you for this. Please write your questions and wishes in the comments.
| Author: Igor Seleznev, Internet entrepreneur, founder of the RELANCE project. I develop an online business and myself, travel, enjoy life and make dreams come true, and help build a remote career.  |
Subscribe to our community on VKontakte and channel on Telegram and build a remote career with us!
Responsibility
Know how to take responsibility for your actions without blaming loved ones, the government and society as a whole for your failures. Responsibility allows you to realize that life and the choices you make depend only on you, which means that only you can know how to act correctly in a particular matter. What should you do in life? First of all, learn to organize yourself and your activities.
// Think big
Think about who you want to remain in history: what will your grandchildren say about you, will they write about you in a textbook. You don't have to want it, but you can try.
Maybe you want to open a relief fund, create a vaccine, paint a great picture, come up with a story that will remain in the hearts of people? You really can do all this, just start right now and work with all your heart.
Can you imagine how simple it is? All that remains is to decide who you want to become. If self-determination is difficult, then read our article “Which mountain are you climbing?”
Exercises to Reveal Hidden Potential
Thanks to classes, you can easily determine your true purpose. Various psychological techniques are often difficult to use, so it is easier to use visualization of plans, desires and future actions. This does not require additional skills or knowledge - everything is very simple, you just need a blank sheet of paper, a pen or pencil and a little patience.
7) Embrace discomfort
We spend so much time trying to be comfortable. We need the perfect room temperature, the perfect drink, the perfect pajamas, the perfect chair.
But comfort means you don't force yourself; comfort means that your body is in a state of relaxation.
If you want something, you need to do whatever it takes to get it, even if it means reducing your quality of life for a while.
Most of us hate experiencing emotions like anxiety and stress, but if we actively avoid these emotions, it means we are not living a fulfilling life.
According to Noam Spanser, Ph.D., avoiding negative emotions gives you short-term gain at the expense of long-term pain.
That's why:
When you avoid the short-term discomfort caused by negative emotions, you become like a person who, when stressed, decides to drink. It “works” and the next day, when the bad feelings come, he drinks again. So far so good, in the short term. However, in the long term, this person will develop a more serious problem (addiction) in addition to the unresolved problems that he was avoiding with alcohol
Noam Spanser says emotional acceptance is a better strategy than avoidance for four reasons:
- By accepting your emotions, you are “accepting the truth of your situation.” This means you don't have to waste energy pushing emotions away.
- Learning to accept emotions gives you the ability to learn about them, become familiar with them, and learn to manage them.
- Experiencing negative emotions is annoying but not dangerous—and ultimately much less unpleasant than constantly avoiding them.
- Accepting a negative emotion leads to the loss of its destructive power. Accepting an emotion allows it to take its course and you to take yours.
Unfortunately, such emotions are part of being human, and the more we can experience them, the more we will get out of life.
By trying something new, we understand what we really want to do in life.
We only get life once - so enjoy life in every way possible - the good, the bad, the bittersweet, the heartbreak - everything!
Here is a great quote from spiritual teacher Osho:
“Experience life in all possible ways—good and bad, bittersweet, dark and light, summer and winter. Experience all duality. Don't be afraid of experience, because the more experience you have, the more mature you become."
Extract and analysis of hobbies, favorite activities
Relax and think about what activities you know that you enjoy the most. Write down at least 20 known hobbies or professions. For example: floriculture, playing the piano, writing articles, dancing, sports, cooking, etc. Analyze the finished list, write next to each item the time you devote (are ready to devote) to this or that type of activity during each day, as well as your preferences in the form of advantages.
Take a close look at your list. Near one (several) points you can see the largest number of advantages and time - this is your unrealized destiny.
What to do while on maternity leave to earn money - TOP 5 options on what you can do to earn money
Women on maternity leave often face a lack of funds. They begin to look for a part-time job that will be profitable, but will not require a huge amount of time in order to be able to take care of the child.
Below are the most popular options for how women on maternity leave can earn money .
Option 1. Home services
This option is suitable for women who have a profession in the service sector. Most often in demand are hairdressers, cosmetologists, manicurists and pedicurists, massage therapists, and seamstresses. If you don't have your own tools and supplies, investments will be required.
The amount of income depends on the quality of the work performed and the materials used, as well as the presence of an extensive customer base.
Profit increases significantly ↑ on the eve of the holidays. During this period, the demand for hairstyles, makeup, carnival costumes and evening dresses increases.
Option 2. Working on the Internet
With the development of Internet technologies, the popularity of online earnings has increased significantly. Regardless of the type of work performed, large investments will not be required. It is enough to have a computer with a stable network connection.
Among the types of work are the following:
- viewing advertisements, clicking, participating in surveys, writing reviews. They do not require special knowledge and skills, but you won’t earn much this way;
- Freelance exchanges bring more income, here you can complete tasks on copywriting, programming, design, text correction (everyone can master everything related to working on texts, for other work you will need special knowledge);
- call center operators, online store managers;
- services of a lawyer, accountant, lawyer;
- creation of video courses and video blogs;
- Cosmetics distributors today can also operate almost entirely online.
We wrote in more detail about working on the Internet without investments and deception in a separate article, where we also cited sites where payments occur every day.
Option 3. Hobby
Craftsmen manage to make what they love a source of income. Unique things are especially popular today.
The following types of activities are in greatest demand:
- embroidery (cross stitch, satin stitch, ribbons, beads);
- knitting (including custom-made);
- beading;
- soap making;
- making candles, jewelry, souvenirs;
- cakes to order.
Option 4: Growing plants or raising animals
This option allows you to earn money from scratch in a small town, especially for residents of villages, rural areas and owners of private houses. Using the example, you can sell seedlings, vegetables, flowers. Dairy and meat products and eggs are also popular.
But it is worth keeping in mind that such income is seasonal. Its size and regularity are determined by the climate.
The exception is flower growing, which can be done all year round.
A good income can be obtained from the offspring of dogs, cats, birds, fish and ferrets. However, this will require an initial investment and certain knowledge.
Option 5. Traveling part-time or visiting a client
Having at least a few hours of free time a day, you can earn income.
The main ways to earn money in this way include:
- yoga and fitness courses , if you have relevant sports experience;
- preparing pregnant women for childbirth and breastfeeding (if you have a medical education);
- work as a tutor (you can teach online);
- child care after kindergarten and school;
In addition, without investment and experience, you can walk dogs, post advertisements, and distribute leaflets.
A woman on maternity leave can easily find a job today. It is important to focus on existing experience and knowledge.
It should be remembered that no legal job requires investment (except for investments).
If an employer asks to pay for materials, training courses, or transfer funds for another purpose, he is most likely a scammer.
Visualization of material well-being
Imagine that your life has changed dramatically, and now, in order to provide for yourself or your family, you no longer need to sit all day in an office, stand at a machine in a factory, run around with a courier bag - in general, you don’t need to work. A bank account has been opened in your name with a round sum, which is enough for a long, comfortable existence, and your children study at a prestigious academy. Introduced? Now think about what you would do if you had a lot of free time and material wealth. Record all possible options on paper and analyze. Your further actions are the beginning of working on yourself in this particular type of activity.
// Think less and do more yourself
Just do it. Allow yourself to make small decisions that feel good to you. Today it will be a latte instead of a cappuccino, and tomorrow you will become who you want to be, because most often this fear of decision-making is directly related to the fact that you are dissatisfied with yourself. So try to do things that give you small bursts of pride.
If you want to change your life, start by admitting that you have the right to make mistakes. One, two, several.
Make mistakes and move on, discover new horizons for yourself.
It is responsibility for the decisions made that will allow you to evaluate your strengths, and inaction and whipping up a depressive mood are unlikely to help.
