How to become a tough, strong-willed person and develop self-confidence: a detailed guide


One of the key success factors is developed willpower, which helps a person overcome difficulties and not succumb to the temptation to quit halfway. At the same time, many people are thinking about how to become a tougher person who, at the right time, can show strength of character and promote their ideas in a society of dissenters.

It is believed that a strong-willed person is firm in his beliefs, principles and ideals. He is self-confident, stress-resistant and copes with unexpected circumstances.

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However, to develop such qualities, everyone needs to make a lot of effort, comparable to daily trips to the gym to improve their physical performance.

Now we will tell you how to become a strong-willed person and develop self-confidence. If you listen to our advice and follow all the recommendations, you can improve your personality and become more successful in any business.

What kind of person can be called tough?

First of all, it is worth understanding who can be considered tough, because often the word “tough” is used to describe a rude and ruthless person who is capable of doing anything to achieve his goals. Naturally, a tough person can be just like that, but this is not at all necessary.

If you want to become tougher, you shouldn't go overboard and bury all your basic ideas about good and evil. Toughness can be manifested in the ability to firmly follow through, make important decisions, maintain composure in stressful situations, and take responsibility.

A tough person does not have to walk around gloomy with a stone face, looking at everyone from under his brows. He can be a cheerful and sincere person, but at the right moments he can show firmness and uncompromisingness.

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Typically, tough people are tempered by difficult life situations and working to overcome them. Over time, they develop a kind of immunity and psychological resistance to such circumstances, along with other useful qualities.

Thus, being tough can be useful in the following cases:

  • conflict situations at work, accompanied by increased stress;
  • unforeseen circumstances requiring a quick response;
  • disputes in which you need to defend your point of view.

It is worth noting that toughness directly depends on willpower, which can be trained daily in different ways. Moreover, like all great things, this path begins with the simplest things.

Learn empathy and gratitude

Put yourself in the other person's shoes

The capacity for compassion lies at the core of strength of character. Try to imagine how other people feel. Maybe your friend recently lost a loved one and has become moody and irritable? Put yourself in his place, and you will be able to understand the motives for his actions. And then it will become clear to you that now he needs not criticism, but friendly support.

Fight prejudice

Most people have an established system of prejudices - conscious or unconscious, many of which have nothing to do with reality. For example, the idea that people without a college degree are not as smart as college graduates. Look around and you will find real examples that refute this belief.

Awareness of your bias is the first step towards overcoming it.

Learn to experience and express gratitude

Gratitude is an important step towards awareness of yourself and the world around you. Make it a part of your daily life and see how your character changes. Every day before you go to bed, think of three things you are grateful for. You can even keep a diary, recording your thoughts in it.

Also, don't forget to express gratitude to people who deserve it. A simple “thank you” or a detailed comment about how much you appreciate another person’s actions helps to see you as a strong person.

How to train willpower

Now we will give the most basic recommendations that will help you train your willpower. On the one hand, all this may seem easy, but you will encounter the real complexity of these recommendations in practice.

Methods to become stronger in spirit

Do you want to become a strong personality? The strong in spirit do not have unnecessary suffering, dramatic attachments to the past, hesitation and affairs abandoned halfway. A strong person realizes what he wants and strives for it. He does not look for excuses or excuses, but brings what he starts to the desired result.

If you do not have these characteristics, strengthen your fortitude.

Why is it important:

  • a strong person is attractive, he is respected, his opinion is taken into account;
  • he controls his life, overcomes obstacles, does not bend to circumstances;
  • copes with adverse conditions without stooping to questionable or dishonest actions;
  • achieves success, does not waste time on nonsense, does not pay attention to trifles.

There are many other reasons that make you want to become mentally strong. Have you decided to strengthen your inner core? What has been done for this?

How to gain mental strength

Some people gain inner strength from birth, while others have to develop it.

Psychologists recommend following simple recommendations for those who are thinking about how to become a strong personality:

  • Don't be afraid in advance
    . Fear hinders development and ruins many endeavors in the bud. Are you haunted by negative, depressing thoughts? Get rid of them, don't be influenced by them. Fight your fears - distinguish reasonable worries from empty ones.
  • Don't feel sorry for yourself
    . You need to love yourself, but there is destructive pity. Make responsible decisions, do not vainly blame others. Only you are responsible for what happens in your life.
  • Live in the present, minimize thinking about the past
    . Focus on the current state, realize your current situation, feel it. Live today - neither in the past nor in the future.
  • Don't ignore your inner desires
    . Do as you see fit, as long as it does not fundamentally conflict with ethics and the criminal code.
  • You cannot become a strong person if you do not appreciate all the good things that happen in life
    . Appreciate the actions done for you, the support, the pleasant moments.
  • Don't worry about what is beyond your control
    . If you cannot change the situation, do not worsen your situation by wasting energy. Let go of events, do what is under your control.
  • Accept failures with grace
    . Look at missteps and unfulfilled hopes from a different perspective: it's a chance to try again and a lesson that gives you experience and extra strength.

What qualities are inherent in a tough and strong-willed person?

In addition to the basic recommendations for training your willpower, we have compiled a list of the main qualities inherent in a tough and strong-willed person. We advise you to pay attention to them.

Determination

Quite often, a strong-willed person is distinguished by the ability to clearly set goals and strive to achieve them, despite external and internal stimuli.

Perseverance

Persistence helps him not to give up at the slightest setbacks, obstacles and doubts.

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Determination

At the same time, it is very important to be ready to make a difficult decision as soon as possible, and not to shirk responsibility or shift it to someone else.

Organization

Without clear planning, it is very difficult to achieve a specific goal, because almost any complex task requires systematics, control and consistent actions.

If a person is constantly subject to sudden impulses, it is very difficult for him to concentrate on something important.

Self-control

A strong-willed and tough person should always be able to control his feelings and emotions, while maintaining clarity of thought.

I want to become a strong person

Do you want to become a strong personality?

Pay attention to these simple recommendations:

  1. Do some self-reflection
    . Think about your preferences and desires. Take several personality tests and answer unexpected questions from them. You probably still don’t understand what kind of person you are - figure it out.
  2. Achieve your goals

    , both small and significant. With every task completed, self-esteem will grow.

  3. Play sports

    . A person who strives to become strong in spirit must not forget about the strength of the body.

  4. Improve your speaking skills

    , work on developing eye contact. When talking, look into the eyes of your interlocutor for so long that you can at least determine the color of his eyes.

  5. Have your own opinion

    , don't give in to pressure. Don't go to extremes: be confident, but not cocky. Advice from wise people is appropriate, but think with your own head, do not follow public opinion.

  6. Don't be superficial

    . Go deeper into the study of issues that are relevant to you, draw conclusions after fully studying the information.

  7. Remember your inner strength, remind yourself of it

    . Mentally say: “I am strong”, “I can cope with any problem”, “I will overcome obstacles”, “I will succeed.”

Think carefully about your actions

In every situation you face, you have a choice. It is up to you to decide how you will react and what actions you should take. Sometimes the right choice is obvious, and sometimes right and wrong cannot be distinguished from each other. Taking the time to think things through will help you make the right choice. Let's say you receive bad news: you weren't accepted for the job you applied for. What possible ways out of the situation can you name? What is the right way out?

Don't back down (unless you have to)

Once you have made a decision, stick to it and stay true to your values. The difficult decision is often the least popular, so there will be times when other people will oppose you. Stay strong when others try to destroy you for doing what you think is right. Although there are exceptions to this rule - for example, when you clearly did or are doing wrong. Don't automatically defend yourself if you are accused of being wrong. If you realize that it would have been better to do something different and your choice turned out to be wrong, just admit it.

Keep yourself in good physical shape

Being physically strong and healthy is good for your mind too. If you constantly feel tired and in a bad mood, it will be much more difficult for you to solve problems that arise. Don't neglect your body's health if your goal is to be tough. There are a few simple steps to keep your body healthy:

  • Get enough sleep. This will keep your body healthy and help you stay alert. The goal is 7-8 hours a day. Make it a priority!
  • Eat plenty of vegetables and fruits. By making this the basis of your diet, you will get the vitamins and nutrients your mind needs to stay strong.
  • Exercise. Strength training will keep your body and brain in good shape.
  • Fight stress. If your world is cluttered with millions of things to do, it will affect your ability to make good decisions.

Look problems in the eye

Don't try to avoid difficulties by running away or pretending they don't exist. The ability to “face” reality will help you make practical decisions that will ultimately lead to positive change. If you bury your head in the sand, problems will only accumulate. Resist the temptation to ignore problems by indulging in escapist behavior. Drinking alcohol, sitting in front of TV in the evenings, sleepless nights on the Internet, gambling and other similar forms of destructive behavior will distort the view of reality.

Enrich your spiritual life

An active spiritual life will help you understand what you need when your problems seem to threaten to consume you. Find ways to become more spiritually aware and connected to the rest of the world. Doing yoga, meditating, participating in worship, and spending time in nature are all good ways to enrich yourself spiritually.

Emotional intellect

Psychological strength is determined by emotional intelligence. You cannot be a psychologically strong person if you do not understand negative emotions, do not know how to manage them and achieve a productive result in spite of everything. The moments in which your psychological strength is tested also test your emotional intelligence. This is a flexible skill that you can develop through conscious effort. All the most successful people have high emotional intelligence. It is relatively rare: only thirty-six percent of people are able to recognize what emotions they are experiencing.

Don't be self-righteous after making mistakes

Mistakes are an inevitable part of life. Tough people use their mistakes as tools to learn how to succeed next time. If you tend to let mistakes get the better of you, or worse, blame someone else for your own mistakes, then you have the wrong attitude towards failure. Try to approach your mistakes differently. Learn to acknowledge them (first of all to yourself). It is a misconception that in order to be tough you must act as if you are always right. In fact, the opposite is true: tough people are willing to admit their mistakes so that they can then correct them.

Make strong connections with other people

There is power in numbers. It's easier to build a wall around yourself than to reach out and create deep relationships with other people. Earning and maintaining people's trust is no easy feat. It may sound strange, but showing vulnerability in front of others is actually an important part of being tough. Show your family, friends and colleagues that you deserve their trust and love. Answer emails and calls quickly and be there for people when you need it. Take on a leadership role in your community. You can dedicate your time to helping others, coaching a small team - say, at work or at the recreational level. Place a bet in your community!

Listen to advice from wise people

It's good to admit that you could use some tips. Other people's opinions can be valuable if you find yourself in a situation you haven't encountered before. Ask people you trust what they would do in your position. Remember, however, that only you can ultimately determine the best course. Other people's opinions are secondary to your own values. Friends and family are good people to confide in when you need to make an important decision. However, don't always follow their advice because people who know you, even if they love you very much, may have a vested interest in your decision. For example, while your mother would prefer you not to move to another city, her advice about which college you should choose may be purely emotional. Seeing a therapist or counselor is a great idea if you think a professional opinion would be helpful.

Achieve your goals

Everyone sets goals, but achieving them is a completely different matter. Achieving most goals requires hours of monotonous hard work. If you want to be tough, be prepared to put in the time and effort required to achieve your goals. Break your goals down into manageable steps and set a timetable for completing them. This way you will know exactly what you need to do to get to the finish line. Be relentlessly persistent. If you give up before you reach your goal, you are letting yourself down. Don't let yourself lose interest or get tired of working hard.

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