We all reach a critical point in life when our psychological strength is tested. This could be problems with friends or colleagues, a difficult job, or a difficult relationship. Whatever the challenge, you need to stay strong and take action if you want to move forward. Sounds simple. Everyone wants to have good friends, a good job and a good family. But in reality this is difficult to achieve. This is human psychology. It is difficult for us to continue to fight when the result is not obvious. Not everyone can break the pattern of behavior and start moving in a completely different direction. This is why truly strong people stand out in the crowd.
What for others is an insurmountable barrier, for them is only a test that can be overcome. You can be that person too! You just need to develop habits that build your mental strength. The hallmarks of strong people are qualities that you can develop in yourself.
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Emotional intellect
Psychological strength is determined by emotional intelligence. You cannot be a psychologically strong person if you do not understand negative emotions, do not know how to manage them and achieve a productive result in spite of everything. The moments in which your psychological strength is tested also test your emotional intelligence. This is a flexible skill that you can develop through conscious effort. All the most successful people have high emotional intelligence. It is relatively rare: only thirty-six percent of people are able to recognize what emotions they are experiencing.
Facial expressions
Young children unknowingly spend a lot of time in front of the mirror, trying on the different shapes that their faces can take. This allows you to use facial expressions more confidently in the future, knowing for sure which mask the face takes on in a given situation. Only children are unlikely to fully realize what they are doing at this moment; for them it is just a game.
Another thing is professional actors who do the same thing, weighing every detail. After all, if necessary, a person must express his internal state in such a way that unnecessary words are not needed.
Firstly, such a skill can eliminate the need to compose awkward formulations, when with the help of one mine you can immediately demonstrate your attitude. Secondly, a favorable facial expression will always enhance the effect of what is said, especially when it is necessary to give personal assessments.
Self confidence
A psychologically strong person knows that his beliefs greatly influence whether he achieves success. This is not just a matter of motivation, it is a real fact. Researchers have found that more confident people earn more and move up the career ladder faster. True confidence is always visible and cannot be confused with the false confidence that people use to hide their fears. Psychologically strong people know how to inspire others with their confidence, so everything works out better in their lives.
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The world is not perfect
Some things are beyond human ability to change and you have to put up with them. You're not trying to persuade a volcano to stop erupting, are you? So you shouldn’t waste time on people whose attitudes and principles differ from yours, trying to convince them that you are right. In this way, you put yourself in a position of justification, and in the end it may turn out quite the opposite - you will accept a set of attitudes that is alien to you. If someone simply annoys you, learn to be forgiving of other people's weaknesses. Forgiveness and forbearance are a sign of strength.
Ability to refuse
Scientists have found that those people who have difficulty refusing others experience more stress. Psychological strength allows you to refuse when it is appropriate. You simply have enough self-esteem and communication skills to convey your refusal. A strong person does not mask refusal with uncertainty, he refuses calmly. He understands that this gives him the opportunity to perform those tasks that interest him. In addition, psychological strength helps to deny yourself. Such a person does not want to act impulsively.
Movements and gestures
First of all, you should get rid of constrained movements. Besides the fact that it looks somewhat ridiculous, others perceive this manner as internal insecurity. It is very important that all human movements appear smooth and coordinated. In this case, other people will see in front of them a liberated person who does not suffer from internal contradictions.
You also need to always know what to do with your hands. If you use practiced gestures during a conversation, this will only enhance the overall effect of what was said.
Body language is hardly less eloquent than speech. Thus, some gestures can accentuate someone else’s attention, while others can demonstrate inflexibility. Gestures can express a playful mood, a desire to withdraw, indignation or outright interest.
Ability to neutralize problem people
Dealing with unpleasant people is difficult for most of us. A morally strong person knows how to control communication with toxic interlocutors and monitors his own emotions. He does not allow anger or irritation to control the situation. In addition, a strong person is always able to understand someone else’s point of view and find a common language. Even when the situation gets out of control, moral strength helps you stay away and not let negativity ruin your life.
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Body language or posture
In fact, posing is a whole science that media figures have been studying for years. A skilled photographer will always present his character only from the most favorable angle in the photo.
After all, if you imagine a stooped person with his head down and shifting from foot to foot, he will automatically fall into the “victim” category. This means that such an opponent is unlikely to be capable of serious resistance and will surrender at the first onslaught.
On the other hand, if a person stands confidently on two legs, has his shoulders back and his chin raised, then he is at least open to dialogue. This means on a subconscious level that the question posed will most likely be followed by an answer. And if you don’t want to receive an inconvenient answer, then it’s better to take care of carefully wording the question.
Ability to accept change
Psychologically strong people are flexible and adapt easily. They know that fear of change only gets in the way and becomes an obstacle to success. Such a person is ready for change and easily creates a plan of action. Only when you are ready for change will you get the good out of it. You have to be open to what's happening and that will help you.
Word
It should be remembered that words serve to enable people to exchange thoughts. The more accurately and concisely a thought is formulated, the more likely it is that it will be conveyed without distortion. Correct speech delivery can only be achieved through systematic practice. It is important not only to acquire as large a vocabulary as possible, but also to practice their correct pronunciation.
Some people, out of a desire to look smarter, use words whose meaning is unclear to them. As a rule, such difficulties only lead to piquant situations when a person makes himself a target for ridicule. The use of “smart words” is not a sign of high intelligence; on the contrary, an educated person should have the ability to express even complex thoughts in simple words.
The ability to not live in the past
A mentally strong person knows that what he focuses on determines his emotional state. If you only think about the problems that surround you, you will suffer from negative emotions and stress, which reduces your productivity. If you focus on actions that will help you improve yourself and your situation, you will feel more positive and productive. Moral strength helps you distance yourself from your mistakes, but not forget them.
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How can a man and woman become psychologically and morally stronger?
How to become cooler and psychologically stronger as a teenager, man or woman, these are different questions. We will look at what they have in common and what recommendations are appropriate based on a person’s gender.
And immediately a provocative question. Do you want to be cooler for what or who? What a stupid question you ask? The fact of the matter is that this is the very question from which we will start. Because I don’t want to lead you into a trap where you gain one thing and at the same time lose yourself.
What is the pitfall of trying to become mentally stronger?
So, we only follow the path that a man should be a man, and a woman should be a woman. Yes, I understand that in our time, a woman has to do part of a man’s work. Often a man becomes more effeminate.
What's the trap? The point is that I will only make the problem worse if you want to not be yourself. A woman, having become “as if” psychologically stronger, will begin to fulfill the role of a man even more. And the young man or man will move even further away from himself, even if he can feel comfortable for a while.
Are we for solving the problem at its root, or do we need a pill? =))
Do we want to be a woman or a man?
In the end, by pumping ourselves up with some training and recommendations, we will only lose ourselves because we will go against our nature.
So they don’t go for long-term results and happiness.
And here I don’t mean that a woman’s destiny is to stand behind the stove, and a man’s purpose is to work with his hands or go into business. We will talk about something else. There are two pillars from which everything comes from. One support is common for both men and women, the second is individual.
Let's get to the root!
How to become a cooler and psychologically stronger girl
So, first for girls or women. One of the sources of our unhappiness is that we intentionally or unknowingly play a role that is not ours. The main motive of a woman to become psychologically and morally stronger is absolutely clear, and I do not condemn it . It lies in the fact that there is this or that pressure from the opposite sex, from the husband.
Naturally, a woman does not want to bow her head and indulge a man in everything. No, in fact, every woman has exactly this nature - she will submit to a man, however, the problem is that not everyone has enough men to whom they would like to submit and not think about everyday problems.
Therefore, girls have only two options.
The first thing is to find such a man. The task is extremely difficult, and let's be realistic, for many it is impossible. =)) If you are interested in the question, “How to find your soulmate,” read my article about it.
In the first and most successful option, everything is simpler, because female psychology works differently when there is definitely a reliable rear and there is no need to prove anything to anyone. A woman occupies her natural niche, not necessarily the mistress of the kitchen, but the “co-pilot”.
And with a strong, not flawed man, a woman reveals her nature and abilities to the maximum.
Such a man will not hide her from society, but will give her the opportunity to do what she wants, where she intuitively feels strong and confident.
This will be her psychological stability and strength, that on the one hand there is a reliable rear, on the other - her self-realization.
Become cooler or take off our armor?
In the second option or path, the girl (woman) is forced to pull everything herself or a lot. Here she finds herself face to face with the world. And of course, this increased psychological defense comes in handy. Yes, we say that this is precisely the protection of women.
For many girls, what they are born with is not enough. The reality is that armor is needed. For starters, at least the external one, which is filmed in the evening at home. True, if you don’t take off your chain mail at home, withdrawal or bitterness occurs. We don’t already know where we are and where is alluvial.
Our real selves are not visible behind the armor.
There is only one way out along the second path without losing yourself. There may be some general advice here, but it is very individual. What suits one may not suit another. We will not point our fingers at the sky. But the armor still needs to be removed, or rather transformed. It doesn't matter if you are married or not.
Armor is more of a masculine attribute.
It’s very sad to look at 25-35 year old girls who walk around offices with the air of a general with different degrees of protection. Their credo is, if not to eat everyone around, showing their strength, then at least not to become a victim, psychologically. Moreover, 90% of them cannot get married.
Men don't need generals at home. =)) Many of us are not generals ourselves yet.
Again. Their motive is clear.
Who will protect the weaker sex except themselves? The motive is clear, the decision is wrong. This is a typical trap. But if we are going to solve the problem at its root, then we will need to move on to the second pillar. We'll talk about it a little later, when we look at the male part.
How to become cooler and psychologically stronger for men
Armor, both on a woman and a man, is self-deception. As men know, a fight is often won before it even starts. All because someone has already lost psychologically.
And armor won't help here.
She can only save once, well, twice, and only with a stranger.
Those who know you even a little understand well that you are not who you say you are. Girls can be misled for a long time. But men - no.
The good news is that it is precisely a man, by his destiny and nature, that needs and is important to become psychologically and morally stronger. If a woman puts on armor out of despair, then a man wears it out of self-doubt or vulnerability.
There is only one way out for men - to become a confident person. And physical strength plays a secondary role here. We are not reading an article on how to move a carriage. Everything comes from the strength of spirit, the inner core of a man.
We become truly cool and strong by developing our strongest sides given to us by nature, and not by imitating someone else. More on this below.
Vulnerability is a hindrance to development
The nature of the vulnerability of a young man or man lies in the fact that he is sure that he is different from what he is perceived to be. He is not ready within himself for the fact that people may have a different opinion about him. The world is more cruel. This results in roughness and the need to wear chain mail.
There is no other way out but to stop considering yourself a special person and to be offended. Yes, we are all special as individuals, but in the flow of people no one notices this. And few people appreciate it.
And the problem is that he will never appreciate it.
You see, in fact, no one cares about us. Then you shouldn't expect anything.
At one time I told myself. All! I am no longer offended by anything or anyone. I don’t care what you thought about me, my assessment of myself does not depend on your perception. You may not believe me, I usually work on something else in my capacity for years, but here everything was decided in weeks.
Self-confidence takes years to develop. You can get things moving quickly, but achieving lasting results will take time. But! You and I have no other choice than women =)). This actually makes things easier.
But there is a way out and a direction to move!
Now we are all moving together to a common path, to the path that will give confidence to a man and the necessary self-esteem to a woman. Then, when there is nothing to prove.
What unites psychologically strong people
So, psychological instability and discomfort comes from our lack of self-confidence.
And uncertainty is born from the fact that we are busy with other things.
I'm not talking about business, I'm talking about our destiny.
We are often busy doing something in which we constantly have to prove something to others and ourselves. If you’re not in your field, one way or another it will still not turn out well. And so on in a circle, in a vicious circle. Yes, we can even succeed in this business that is not ours, but then some newcomer comes, quickly understands the essence of the issue, and after a short time he is the queen!
And not just in queens, but with the best result relative to us!
Arrogance does not make a person cool and strong
How do we feel?
Annoyance, self-doubt.
We are psychologically losing to such a hustler. He speaks confidently. We pretend to be confident with him. We don't know things the way he does.
If we are talking about very young people, this does not count. Everyone was once young and green. We try ourselves here and there. It's okay to find your own path
The trick is that when we do our own thing, we follow what is intended for us, even if we don’t know much yet, a different energy already emanates from us.
We have the energy of life. It is always felt by those who follow their own path. No matter how happy the people I met, they all had one thing in common: they loved what they did.
And of course, they don’t ask themselves such a question as how to become cooler and psychologically stronger. This is one of the secrets. Why do we want to become psychologically strong? In essence, to win the competition.
How to become stronger, or what else our path gives
We need all victories for material well-being and self-confidence, including through victories over others. This is a way, but not a reliable one. There will be someone who will defeat us.
We need to adopt a different strategy. Yes, of course, here too we can lose to someone. But there is a significant difference. It is that:
First , we are much happier and more self-realized doing our own thing.
Secondly , competition within our own weight category truly develops and gives us the strength to follow our own path, and not the wrong one. Here growth is always and reliably.
on a note!
How to become cooler and psychologically stronger means how to find yourself.
In order not to make reading long and tedious, there is a separate free book of mine on this topic, which is called “How to Find Yourself.”
In this article, we examine this issue in detail, but without unnecessary “water”. You can start reading from the second chapter.
Here I’ll just lift the veil of the topic a little and say that for this we need to figure out who we are by our psychophysical nature. Let me emphasize that this is the main secret.
Everything else is superficial or short-term.
Without understanding fundamental things, we will not build a building.
Whoever likes it, there is also another tool in finding yourself. I'm talking about astrology. But not the one we hear on the radio and read briefly in magazines. No! We are talking about Vedic astrology. A real astrologer will connect your life with your karmic tasks. And this is your purpose in life, something you cannot escape.
This is a very deep analysis of yourself.
Again.
We become truly cool and strong by developing our strongest sides given to us by nature, and not by imitating someone else.
We discussed the topic of how to become cooler and psychologically stronger. Write comments, share the article with friends, join my VK group. Be happy!
Now a little advertising =)). I have done my best to ensure that advertising does not interfere with your reading.
Regular training
Research has shown that people who exercise twice a week feel more competent socially, intellectually and physically. They value themselves higher and raise their self-esteem. Finally, physical changes in the body help them to be more confident, which is the key to mental strength. It turns out that if you want to become mentally stronger, start training your body!
What prevents us from becoming strong
Becoming truly strong is not so easy, especially since there are so many circumstances around that oppose it. Let's look at the factors that are the enemies of a confident woman:
- Constant self-criticism greatly reduces a woman's self-confidence. Many girls love to look for flaws in themselves and, surprisingly, they find them, even if those around them do not notice them at all. There is no need to constantly criticize yourself and look for shortcomings and disadvantages in all your actions. If they are insignificant and do not harm the final result, you can safely forget about them, or not give them any importance at all
- Excess weight is a problem for many people in our country. Especially for the female sex, it has a detrimental effect, primarily on the psyche and self-esteem. It's rare to find a woman who is overweight and happy with her appearance. So, if you are overweight, start trying to get rid of it
- Dependence on other people's opinions. Many women are afraid to change something in their lives just because they are worried about what people will say
- Consciousness of the “victim”. There are many women who believe that someone is constantly depriving them of something and offending them, and are constantly in a negative mood. Of course, with such thoughts there is no question of gaining self-confidence and that you are loved.
Let go of such thoughts, accept the love of your loved ones for you with gratitude and reciprocity, you don’t need to assume that everyone wants harm to you
Getting enough sleep
The importance of sleep for moral strength cannot be overstated. When you sleep, your brain gets rid of toxic proteins that are byproducts of nervous activity. This only happens in a dream. If you don't rest, proteins remain in your brain cells and prevent you from thinking. A mentally strong person knows that his self-control and attention suffer from lack of rest, so sleep is his priority. Remember this and always try to allow yourself to rest.
Tomorrow has already come
Our perception does not know the word “tomorrow”. Every person lives today, at this hour and this minute. Therefore, the words “I’ll put it off until tomorrow” are very often synonymous with “I’ll never do it.” This applies not only to your career, it applies to all areas of life - recreation, hobbies, sports. How do you want to become morally and psychologically stronger if you put off “until tomorrow” the opportunity to approach the woman you like? Live and enjoy the present moment, discarding the past and without fear of the future!
Positive attitude towards what is happening
If you follow the news, it becomes clear that war, cruelty and failures do not stop. It seems like the world is collapsing. Who knows, maybe this is really true. But you shouldn't panic if you can't control what's happening. Instead, focus your energy on your own productivity. This will allow you to move forward successfully and not succumb to negative thoughts. This approach distinguishes a psychologically strong person.
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Eyes
It is not for nothing that they say that the eyes are a reflection of the soul. By looking into the eyes of your interlocutor, you can always feel whether he is being disingenuous or speaking frankly. After all, the most difficult thing to keep track of is your own eyes; they are the most difficult to control.
This is not related to the complexity of the structure of the eye, the point here is different. It’s just that the eye reacts with lightning speed to the train of thoughts born in the brain. For this reason, as a rule, even a fleeting thought almost always finds reflection there.
But people who know how to control their own gaze are able to make a deep impression on others. After all, you sometimes hear about people with cold, lifeless eyes. As a rule, they are feared and try not to provoke them unnecessarily.
But everything is actually much simpler, some by nature, and others through training, have acquired the ability not to react with their eyes to their own train of thought. This is not a simple matter, but it provides obvious advantages.
Self pity
This is probably the most dangerous destroyer of the human psyche. Self-pity leads a person to a dead end, at first laziness appears, gradually this feeling drains all the energy from a person and in the end apathy awaits him. Complaining is simply wasting your life.
A feeling of self-pity prevents people from making the right decisions that could change their lives for the better; a person begins to walk in circles. If a person feels sorry for himself, then along with pity he lets in all other negative feelings. Hatred, anger, resentment appears. Perhaps all these feelings are directed towards the person who caused the offense, or maybe towards himself. Scientists have long been able to prove that negative emotions have a negative impact on human health, and various diseases such as cancer appear.
Finishing touches
My dear women! This article of mine is a call to all of you to stop worrying about trifles and become self-confident, strong and courageous. Remember that we have one life, and we need to live it in such a way that in old age there is something to remember, and for this, first of all, self-confidence is necessary.
I really hope that after reading my article, you will be inspired to achieve things and want to change something in your life, of course, for the better.
If you want to study this topic in more depth, I offer you an excellent guide, which I myself read in one sitting, a book that many women around the world were waiting for. This is the book “Money is good for women” by Bodo Schäfer and Carola Ferstl. It describes how financial independence affects a woman and how it can be achieved.
If you remember, in the article I already noted that material wealth is one of the most important factors that provides a woman with self-confidence
A person should do what he loves
Any person is truly happy only when he is busy doing what he loves. You cannot follow the lead of public opinion, you must fulfill your desires and dreams . You don’t need to do something just because it’s stylish or fashionable, the main thing is to enjoy it. In communication you should adhere to the same beliefs. You need to communicate with people who are good to be around, and with others only when necessary. Such actions will help a person save his nerves and time. A person always has a choice: what to do, with whom to communicate, what to choose, and each person decides for himself whether to use these choices or not.
They don't expect instant results
Yes, work is not always easy and you don’t always want to. But wait, be patient: the more you work, the better and juicier the fruits are - qualitative changes always take time. And in order not to burn out, invest your energy in doses.
Tags: education • life • how they live • people • morally strong • character • person
