How to communicate with a psychopath: expert advice. Signs of a psychopath

• How can you recognize a psychopath?
• How to communicate with a psychopath?
• How to leave a psychopath?

The word “psychopath” does not at all mean that this is a person capable of murder or a serious crime. difficult to communicate with him in everyday life , not to mention building love or friendships.

You need to know the rules of communicating with psychopaths in order not to jeopardize your own self-esteem

About the disorder

What is psychopathy? To know how to communicate with a psychopath, you should familiarize yourself with this pathology. This term is translated from Greek as “soul” (psyhe) and “suffering” (pathos). Psychopathy is a congenital or acquired disorder in the functioning of the higher nervous system. As a result, the volitional character traits of a person are deformed, which define him as an individual in society. Psychopathic disorder is the line between a healthy psyche and pathology. This does not mean that a psychopath must be weak-minded or have low intelligence. Quite the contrary, it is predominantly people with this pathology who successfully realize themselves in business and creativity.

“Am I crazy, or what?”

— Many of us do not like to go to any doctors, and even a visit to a psychiatrist is perceived as something prohibitive. Why? What stops people? After all, sometimes you can’t do without help.

— Firstly, people have little idea what psychiatric disorders are. Most consider only the most severe conditions or those “pictures” that they see in movies and TV series, or read about in books, as disorders. In fact, 80% of what we see in movies for the mass audience is a very approximate variation on the theme of psychiatry,

It is impossible to focus on what patients with mental diagnoses look like in art.

Second. Psychiatry has a bad reputation in Russia. We regularly get stories in the press about how someone was forcibly and harshly, in violation of their rights, “taken to a mental hospital.” Since many of them are true, I do not think that psychiatry should be written any differently. But these publications are unlikely to make the reader go to a neuropsychiatric dispensary with joyful hope.

In addition, our people really do not like to communicate with repressive authorities. And in the history of our country there is recent documented experience of how psychiatry was used to combat undesirables. The myth “I went to the PND and ended up in the KGB” is alive.

Therefore, people are more willing to turn to private psychiatrists or regular (somatic) hospitals. But in fact, the likelihood that you will be tied up and taken somewhere because you woke up in the morning and decided that life has been somehow hard for you for a year now, and you finally need to go to the doctor is practically zero.

There are also people who are contemptuous of everything with the prefix “psycho-”. Many of them cannot distinguish a psychologist from a psychotherapist, but at the same time they are wildly afraid of even the very idea of ​​​​seeing a specialist: “Am I crazy, or what?” People do not understand that from a psychologist to a psychiatrist is a huge path that they may never travel.

It is also important to understand that the treatment of mental illness is a long story. Often, upon hearing a doctor’s order: “Come back in a week,” patients turn around and don’t come back; I once did that myself. But if, for example, you had surgery on your finger, you will go through all the dressings until your drainage is removed and the wound heals.

It’s the same with a mental diagnosis - it cannot be correctly stated at one time, it can be specified, especially since many mental illnesses have common symptoms.

About behavior

In a person with this pathology, negative emotions often predominate. According to experts, psychopaths can be very vulnerable in early childhood. Over the years, all feelings are completely repressed. Due to his very unrestrained character, it is very difficult for a psychopath to adapt to society. A person with a mental disorder often embellishes circumstances and engages in self-hypnosis. As a result, based on his own attitudes, he will enter into various conflicts. His enemies can be both colleagues at work and household members. It should be noted his complete indifference. Such a person is not at all interested in the feelings and problems of other people. He often neglects the rules accepted in society and universal human laws.

A psychopathic person often displays aggression and violence to satisfy his needs. In this case, the psychopath will not feel guilty. Even if he is punished for what he did, he will not draw any conclusions for himself. The fact is that a psychopathic person will not analyze his own mistakes and learn from experience. He firmly believes that he always does the right thing. According to experts, it is very difficult to build a normal relationship with a psychopath. It is important to remember that a person with such a disorder is first and foremost an egoist. In a relationship with you, he will always strive to take a leading position. At the same time, due to his emotional imbalance, he is cowardly. It is possible that in a certain situation he will easily betray you. Men with this pathology carefully think through their tactics and, if necessary, disguise themselves perfectly. They may even seem charming and achieve great success at work. If the communication does not last long, then you are unlikely to recognize a psychopathic personality in him. As a result, the woman ends up in a network. Soon the true face of the chosen one will appear in the form of domestic violence, which cannot be eradicated.

Prepare for the worst consequences

Psychopaths can redirect all the arguments said against him against you. Get ready for his counterattacks in the form of slander, spreading gossip, and refutations of your words: “it happened for other reasons,” “we were children and it is impossible to remember the reasons for what happened,” “she was under severe stress at that moment,” and so on. ... An attack can look different. If your communication consists of correspondence on the Internet, through social networks, then he can use them against you by starting to openly comment on your photos on Instagram, discuss you in VKontakte groups, and the like.

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How to recognize a psychopath?

Lacking networking skills, such individuals are not friends with anyone. It is considered normal for a psychopath to ignore generally accepted norms of behavior. This is how they alienate people. Of course, they can masterfully imitate feelings, but there are the following signs of a psychopath that can be identified:

• The duration of sleep for such a person is very short.
• A psychopath does not feel a sense of recognition or gratitude.
• They are vindictive.
• Inconsistent. They often have a lot of started and unfinished tasks.
• They lie constantly.
• Psychopaths do not have long-term love relationships.
• Prone to sexual perversions.
• Thinking outside the box.

Among the various signs of a psychopath, one should note his penchant for extreme activities. The fact is that such a person does not have a danger reflex. As a result, he may expose both himself and others to unnecessary risks. How to recognize a psychopath? According to experts, a person with this pathology is a good actor. Depending on the situation and personal needs, he will change masks and skillfully dissemble. A similar pathology is characteristic of the fair sex. Men find such women interesting at first. Later they don’t know how to live with a psychopath. It turns out that the chosen one is very selfish, cold and neglects the best feelings. Men who do not know how to communicate with a psychopath in the family should understand the classification of this pathology.

Suicides

Suicidal behavior is another problem that relatives of patients with a psychiatric diagnosis may face. And the most unpleasant thing about this behavior is the fact that a suicide attempt is difficult to predict. A person can carefully hide his intentions if he has made a final decision. Sometimes the patient manipulates in order to attract attention or gain some benefit. However, distinguishing between a demonstrative patient and a patient who has decided to commit suicide can be difficult and sometimes impossible. The most dangerous is the so-called extended suicide, when the patient decides to “save the suffering” of other people, for example members of his family. And first he kills his relatives, and then himself.

About the excitable type

Girls with this pathology are characterized by strong emotional reactions and a predisposition to alcoholic beverages. The excitable type of psychopathy involves high irritability and a tendency to aggression. Attacks of rage come very quickly. There may be several reasons for this. Often such women are not satisfied with what is happening around them, they find fault with everything and start an argument. They are very stubborn, and therefore, when the angry mood passes, they will not suffer from remorse.

About hysterical

Women of the hysterical type with frequent mood swings have a very rich imagination. Such a person is distinguished by theatrical, feigned behavior. Girls with this pathology demonstrate their inner world to others, endow themselves with non-existent qualities, and exaggerate a lot. They mostly embellish their emotions, which they are actually unable to experience. According to psychologists, the hysterical type will often indulge in dreams that replace reality.

About paranoid

According to psychologists, this type of psychopathy in women is especially pronounced after 25 years. If you connect your life with just such a person, you will soon wonder how to communicate with a psychopathic woman? Not surprising, since girls with this pathology are very jealous and conflict-ridden. They can create a scandal anywhere. The peculiarity of this pathology is that representatives of the fair sex are filled with overvalued ideas that crowd out all other emotions and experiences. As a result, the girl becomes a real fanatic and will seek justice by any means necessary. You should know that a person with this mental disorder is extremely observant, meticulous and curious. It is noteworthy that a psychopath will see in everything an insidious plan against himself. If you don't know how to communicate with a psychopath, just don't show emotion. This will prevent him from manipulating your feelings.

Personality change

The two most unpleasant facts about schizophrenia are that the disease is incurable and it irreversibly changes a person's personality. You may experience a variety of feelings about this: fear, resentment, anger, disappointment, but this will not affect the situation in any way. In the emotional sphere, the “mentally ill” person experiences a certain splitting (splitting). On the one hand, coldness and even cruelty towards others, including relatives, on the other – vulnerability and hypersensitivity. Psychiatrists use the expression “wood and glass” in this case. What previously brought pleasure and made the patient happy no longer arouses any interest in him.

Gradually, he becomes more and more immersed in his autistic fantasy world. Personality changes also affect appearance: such patients neglect basic hygiene rules. It takes a lot of effort from relatives to force the patient to wash himself or brush his teeth. The disease slowly but steadily isolates a person from society.

Legal grounds

Law No. 3185-I. Article 29. Grounds for involuntary hospitalization in a psychiatric hospital.

A person suffering from a mental disorder may be hospitalized in a psychiatric hospital without his consent or without the consent of his legal representative until a judge’s decision, if his examination or treatment is possible only in an inpatient setting, and the mental disorder is severe and causes: a) his immediate danger to himself or others, or b) his helplessness, that is, the inability to independently satisfy the basic needs of life, or c) significant harm to his health due to a deterioration in his mental state if the person is left without psychiatric help.

About women of the schizoid type

As in the case of hysterical psychopathy, schizoid girls are divorced from reality. However, they behave very secretly. In general, this type is characterized by increased vulnerability, impressionability, excessive sensitivity and isolation. When communicating with such a person, his cold attitude towards others is striking. The problems of other people are also not interesting to a schizoid. Thanks to an unconventional type of thinking and a willingness to go above and beyond, women with this pathology quickly make careers and achieve success. A schizoid girl rarely starts relationships with the opposite sex. However, if this happened, then she is prone to self-sacrifice.

Prepare support

It is best to play it safe and prepare to communicate with such a person. Talking to a guy. It will be good if there is a person nearby who knows how to conduct conversations with such people and can support you and prevent him from lashing out at you. If a psychopath gets angry, then expect trouble, he is ready to do the most terrible things. It is better to seek help from your friends personally, and not from general ones, since the psychopath could read your actions and prepare in advance for a similar outcome of events. He could talk to mutual friends in advance, presenting you in a bad light, but out of respect for you or him, they definitely wouldn’t tell you something like that. Therefore, it is better that the person supporting you does not know your opponent.

About affective disorder

This category combines psychopaths of hyper- and hypothymic types. Women of the first type can be recognized by high activity, excessive self-confidence, high mood and optimism. It is not advisable to do any business with a hyperthymic psychopath, since such girls may lie and not keep their promises. The complete opposite of the first is a hypothymic psychopath. Women with this mental disorder are constantly despondent and depressed and look at life pessimistically. The self-esteem of girls of the hypothymic type is underestimated. In addition, they are very unsociable and unhappy with everything.

Is it possible to get rid of this problem

It is possible to get rid of the problem only if the person himself wants it. The wife's desire alone is not enough for a healthy mutual relationship; sooner or later the man will break down and start another scandal. If a person is ready to fight the disorder, it is necessary to contact a psychotherapist or attending physician, who will refer you to the right specialist. Those suffering from the disorder are prescribed a course of antidepressants, antipsychotics and psychotherapy.

What is the friend zone in girls and men - the main signs

Building a relationship with a psychopathic man is pointless, because he does not value anyone but himself. For such people, compassion and pity are alien; it is pointless to hope that the disorder will go away on its own. It progresses over the years, and it is impossible to get rid of it without medical help.

Note! A possible cause of an unbalanced psyche may be trauma received in childhood. Children who have not received enough love and attention often grow up to be psychopaths. Also at risk are those who have suffered traumatic brain injuries and abused alcohol.

Causes of disorders

Mental pathology can be congenital or acquired at an early age. In the latter case, the social environment in which the formation of personality took place plays an important role. If the factors were unfavorable, then the child was more likely to become a psychopath. The appearance of the disorder can also be caused by the following pathological abnormalities:

• As a result of injury to the embryo or during childbirth.
• After infectious diseases.
• The presence of congenital defects in the nervous system.
• If a person has a genetic predisposition.
• If there is even one alcoholic in the family.

After a brain injury, the brain may begin to function differently, resulting in a personality disorder. Overprotection, as well as a complete lack of attention from parents, also in most cases gives impetus to the progression of pathology. This is explained by the fact that a child in conditions of permissiveness, surrounded by care, loses independence and becomes spoiled. Having matured, such an individual will have too high self-esteem.

Treatment of psychopathy

When the disorder is detected early (in adolescence), psychiatrists prescribe “treatment” in the form of social influence, paying special attention to family relationships and education at school.

Self-confidence is good, but the main thing here is the ability to soberly assess your qualities

Psychopathic men are hired in accordance with their mental make-up and level of intelligence.

Psychotherapeutic methods of treatment are simultaneously applied to the patient:

• meditation;
• frequent conversations;
• auto-training;
• hypnosis;
• family therapy.

If necessary, patients are prescribed drug therapy.

The choice of medication depends on the form of psychopathy.

• Hysterical individuals are recommended to take antidepressants and tranquilizers. Persons with weak emotional instability are prescribed herbal preparations (motherwort, valerian, St. John's wort).
• Schizoid psychopaths are treated primarily with cognitive therapy. Drug correction makes no sense. They are recommended to take only sedatives.
• Paranoid psychopaths are treated with tranquilizers and antipsychotics.
• When treating dissocial psychopaths, it is recommended to take psychotropic drugs that relieve attacks of hysteria and aggression.
• Asthenic psychopaths are prescribed antipsychotics , which help reduce the severity of obsessions.

Specialists resort to drug treatment only in exceptional cases. First of all, they try to cope with the personality disorder through psychotherapy.

How to communicate with a psychopath?

If it so happens that you are forced to communicate with a person who has been diagnosed with a mental disorder, adhere to the following rules:

• Don't show emotion. When the opportunity arises, the psychopath will certainly use them for his own purposes. There is no need to be afraid of such people, because a person with this pathology is not always a maniac. Of course, there is some truth in this, since among serial killers the largest percentage are psychopaths. But, according to experts, most of these individuals try not to reveal themselves. However, always be on guard.

• Avoid conflicts. To do this, you will need to reduce the level of your own aggression. If the situation escalates, do not get into a fight.
• Stay confident. Most likely, the psychopath will want to piss you off and will begin to counterattack. Do not give in to provocations, but look calmly and directly. The voice should be firm, but not loud. If such a person sees that you are irritated or afraid, he will begin to manipulate you. This way your weakness will be used against you. It is possible that a psychopath will offer his help. It should not be accepted under any circumstances. Otherwise, this will give the psychopath a reason to go on the offensive again.
• Eliminate contacts. It will be much easier to do this if you only encounter a psychopathic personality at work. It’s worse if a person close to you belongs to this category. It's easier to end a fleeting romance. You can refer to high employment. Deciding to leave a relationship with a psychopath is only the first step. It will not bring results unless you take a tough stand. To do this, you will need to resort to a more effective measure, namely, to virtually completely eliminate even the slightest interaction with a psychopathic person. It would be better to put an end to the relationship remotely. This can be done via telephone or the Internet. This way the unpleasant situation will be depersonalized. If you decide to break the news privately, there is no guarantee that the psychopath will take the news in stride. It may be that he will start a scandal or a fight. In addition, you may perceive what is happening as a drama. For a psychopath, this will become an impetus for action. It is difficult to predict which ones exactly. It all depends on the situation and inclinations of the person with the pathology.
• Keep everything secret. It may be that you decide to involve a group of people as support for yourself. Experts do not recommend doing this, since any confrontation, especially a collective one, will be assessed by a psychopath as a challenge. As a result, this will only encourage a person with a mental disorder, and the separation process will drag on for an indefinite period of time with unpleasant consequences for you. The fact is that a psychopath knows how to deftly manipulate facts. Possessing unconventional thinking, such a person will twist everything, and you will appear in an unpleasant light to the people around you.
• Before leaving a relationship with a psychopath, consult a professional, such as a psychologist, lawyer, or doctor. These people have experience working with psychopaths, and therefore can advise you on something. Otherwise, you may lose your mental and physical health. Some resort to the help of their friends. However, according to experts, they can harm you. It is possible that the psychopath has already worked with them and told many false stories about you. When you turn to them for support, they will think that you are the bad one.

Save your Reputation

Protect any positive reputation you have. Psychopaths have the unique ability to influence people's opinions of themselves and who is being manipulated. Try not to take it personally. I know it's hard to lose the support of friends, family, co-workers and perhaps society at large, but you can't blame people who succumb to the psychological spell that a psychopath weaves around the world like a spider.

A psychopath's overriding goal is to maintain his reputation. He needs to look like an innocent victim in the eyes of as many people as possible, and he has a tremendous track record of proving his impeccable reputation, no matter whose reputation suffers in the process.

Be prepared for the worst

A psychopath will use everything you said or did against you. Expect attacks, slander, slander, gossip, denials like “it was a long time ago” or “oh, it was a joke”; statements that he or she was upset, tired or deceived. These attacks can take countless possible forms. If you communicate via the Internet, please note that your social contacts are easy prey for psychopathic attacks. Friends on Facebook, followers on Twitter, friends and partners on linked-in or any other social networks are very easy prey, and a psychopath, without any embarrassment, will start a wide media campaign against you on social networks.

Document everything

Take photos, save screenshots, copy correspondence, save conversations as audio files. Keep printed copies of everything you can to document any interactions or statements made by your psychopath; Keep these documents in a safe place. Pay attention to what and how you say. Act as if your every word is being recorded and may be read at a future time by a jury or prosecutor, or may be taken out of context in an attempt to make you sound like you are crazy.

Perhaps someday the people who once trusted you will be able to see the truth, but even so, if your psychopath was a master of his craft, they still will not be able to fully trust you as they once did. Even after the essence of the psychopath is fully revealed to the public eye. So do not hold on to the false hope of one day refuting all the undeserved accusations to which you have been subjected. In most cases, the effects of such accusations are permanent, although they may lessen over time. So …

How to protect yourself?

There is a risk that after breaking up with a psychopath, you may lose your reputation and financial resources. A psychopathic personality is very vindictive, and therefore can try to harm you in any way. The ultimate goal of a psychopath is to completely destroy you. For example, your chosen one may contact your boss and say that you take bribes, collaborate with the company's competitors, or steal. Therefore, you will have to be proactive. Tell your boss that you were in a relationship with a psychopathic person, you ended it, and now you are afraid of retaliation. After this, the likelihood that your manager will believe the information received about you is very minimal.

Forgive yourself

The main thing is to forgive yourself. You are not a criminal, you just became a victim. And as a victim, you may have seen yourself as vulnerable or in compromising circumstances, and you may have felt like a fool. But you are not a fool. Anyone can become a victim of an experienced psychopath, and this happens every day in all walks of life and in all walks of life.

You couldn't see it coming... but now that you know, you're less likely to fall victim again... and maybe you can help others see the signs - or at least be aware - that there are evil people, human wolves in sheep's clothing who seek to destroy the lives of other people without any remorse.

All materials on the site are presented for informational purposes only, approved by certified physician Mikhail Vasiliev, diploma series 064834, in accordance with license No. LO-77-005297 dated September 17, 2012, by a certified specialist in the field of psychiatry, certificate number 0177241425770.