A boring object of desire. Why are girls so afraid of bores?


A bore is a person who dwells on one topic for a long time and persistently in a conversation, but in business (during its implementation) and in communication is perceived as annoying, tedious, boring.

However, this disadvantage, in addition to negative aspects, also has positive aspects.

A bore will bring the job he has started to the end, will do it scrupulously, carefully, responsibly, in a conversation he will get to the essence and solution of the problem, find out the answers to all questions of interest, and will not leave any misunderstandings or unclear details.

Bores, as a rule, are efficient, although slow, purposeful, although they can be overly stubborn, intellectual and reasonable, although they can force them to listen to important information, in their opinion, against the will of the interlocutor.

Obsession and arrogance interferes and often becomes a problem in the communication and interaction of people. Not every person is ready to listen for a long time to boring stories about problems or instructions from a bore, or to endure it in everyday life and joint activities.

Some people choose to ignore and avoid communicating with a bore. That is why such people, understanding their problem, ask the question: “How not to be a bore?”

Signs of tediousness

A person with the characteristic of tediousness can be easily recognized by certain signs. A bore often uses in his speech such categorical formulations as “I never...”, “I always...”, extreme statements such as “I hate” or “I adore.”

A person’s tediousness is expressed in his principles of life, so he knows how to twist something insignificant, giving it his own most important meaning.

This quality always pushes a person to be radically different from others. But this is not the preservation of individuality, this is the desire to prove one’s superiority and uniqueness over others in almost everything.

Boredom does not allow him to perceive the indirect message of information, to “read between the lines,” so he needs an accurate explanation, using precisely formulated definitions.

Since the concept of tediousness has synonyms - boring and tediousness, it follows that the main feature of tediousness is the lack of a sense of humor. Bores don't laugh at the jokes that catch everyone's attention, but they laugh until they drop at their own jokes that others don't understand. Boring individuals can “find” a serious meaning in a joke, which they will develop with their philosophical reasoning, and in the end they can even come to a dark ending.

A bore is not able to distinguish something important from something secondary, which is why he often finds fault with various little things. A bore often finds himself in awkward situations that he does not notice. People around him may mock him when he turns an ordinary light conversation into a debate and takes on an important, serious look.

They always try to bypass a boring person, avoid communicating with him, because he tries to give everyone a portion of teachings. They tell everyone how to live, teach them their rules and give dozens of examples of situations in which it is necessary to act as they do.

A boring person, when communicating with an interlocutor, does not allow him to express his opinion, since he has his own arguments on any subject, but often no one wants to listen to them. A boring person cannot find a worthy soul mate and maintain long-term relationships with close friends. At one point, a person discovers that they are avoiding him and limiting all possible meetings with him. Thus, boring people often become lonely.

It is difficult to force a bore to do something uncharacteristic for him, to show imagination, to stir him up. Such a person is extremely fond of details, he is inquisitive and scrupulous; if we add slowness to this, then the fixation will become even higher.

The tendency to become fixated is formed in childhood, in the process of education or self-education; it is developed from the influence of factors and living conditions.

A bore is a person who, with age, has acquired various complexes and prejudices; he thinks in a stereotyped way and acts in a habitual manner. Such a person forgets about manifestations of the moment, spontaneity, creativity, fun, risk and dreams.

Types of tediousness

Not all nerds are the same. It all depends on what a person fixates on most often and to what extent he experiences difficulties from it.

Types:

  • Pessimist

A person who is always not satisfied with everything, so that everything bad and wrong does not happen. A pessimistic bore loves to complain about life, talks about problems for a long time and tediously, he is always in a bad mood, he is passive and lazy.

  • Pedant

For such a subject, everything should always be known, clearly, and thought out. A bore loves order in everything; spontaneity and impulsiveness are something terrifying for him. Surprises and unpredictable situations disturb, anger, and cause other negative emotions.

  • Professor

This is a man who endlessly “lectures.” The “professor” is smart, well-read, erudite. He always begins the story from afar, delving into details, making lyrical digressions. His speech is a monologue, he speaks as if he is reading a book. Such a smart bore loves to cling to words, correct, supplement, interrupt his interlocutor.

  • Dependent

Such a bore is dependent, helpless, inexperienced. He pesters those around him with requests for help, likes to ask unnecessary clarifying questions, and gets offended if he is not given enough attention and participation.

This is a “tail” person; he will not lag behind until he receives the desired help or shifts responsibility to the “guardian,” although he can handle many things on his own.

A bore can be a wonderful person, but with his annoyingness and arrogance he can push people away. How to eliminate excessive intrusiveness, which makes others bored? How not to be boring?

How to get rid of boredom

Since boring is the opposite of exciting, it means that a boring person needs to become exciting and interesting.

How to treat tediousness

? If a person notices his boring quality, then he should actively look for ways to treat his boringness. You need to react to this and change your usual way of behavior. For example, brighten up your evenings at home with new activities, spend time with your girlfriend, visiting unknown places, look for interesting and popular topics for conversations with friends, expand your range of interests and knowledge.

You should be able to move away from your usual pastime, be an active, often unpredictable, positive and free person.

You need to set yourself in a positive mood. Cheerful people experience all difficulties much easier; with the help of humor they can easily get out of a difficult situation without creating additional problems for themselves. Individuals who are open and friendly to others will always greet acquaintances with warm, good words, others always like them, and people are drawn to them to chat. Such (moderately) positive individuals will not dare be called boring. If you overdo it with humor, you can earn the fame of the first clown.

To overcome a boring quality, you need to learn to relate to people's behavior more simply. This means that if there is a feeling that you want to somehow react to a person’s action, reproach, teach, then it is better to move away, be silent, turn it over in your head, but not express it, this is what expresses the person’s tediousness and alienates people from him.

Who likes to be criticized, corrected, or have a mistake pointed out, especially in a company? If you really want to make a remark, and it seems fair to you, then it is better to find a time for this when the person is alone, in order to express your opinion in a calm atmosphere and very tactfully.

To free yourself from tediousness, instead of teaching others your principles (increasing self-esteem, but falling in the eyes of others), listen and respect your interlocutors.

It’s rare that anyone likes know-it-all upstarts; you shouldn’t behave like that, it’s better to show your curiosity and interest in others. Unless someone asks, you shouldn't give people personal advice. Everyone is independently responsible for the decisions made and mistakes made. Advice that was formed based on personal experience may not be suitable for others, since their situations involve other people, with different characters, and are influenced by other factors. Your advice can further ruin the situation and cause harm. You should think big so as not to seem boring. To overcome one’s own boringness, a person must try to imagine himself in the place of another, and evaluate the situation with an objective eye.

A person’s tediousness is expressed in the peculiarities of his speech, in the phrases: “In our time...”. Therefore, you should keep your statements under control and use them in the appropriate place.

People suffering from tediousness burden others with their own problems. If this is a conversation with close friends with whom personal life is discussed and advice is exchanged, then yes, such conversations are acceptable, and do not forget that others also want to speak out. It's better to tell everything in general. The interlocutor, when he wants, will ask about the details himself.

In order not to demonstrate boringness, it is important not to impose personal company. When someone has no desire to talk, perhaps he is not in the mood, there is no need to insist on inclusion in communication.

You need to learn to monitor people's reactions; from it you can see that the interlocutor is tired, even when he does not directly say so. It is stopping at the right moment that will help a person overcome his own boredom. Gradually, a habit is formed of focusing less attention on details and ending the conversation in advance, as it drags on and becomes boring to the interlocutor.

If an individual considers himself sufficiently educated, he should not demonstrate this everywhere, teaching others. People around you may not like being interrupted and corrected in everything. It’s better to let people make inaccuracies than to ruin relationships over trifles. What is a way for a person to raise his income will be perceived by others as boring.

You should stop finding fault with others, understand that they have an independent decision on how to live. With your nagging you will only show your tediousness and will not be able to teach your wisdom.

In order to think more broadly and develop imagination along with it, it is important to devote time to hobbies: reading literature, drawing, sewing, crafting. Over time, it will be possible to notice that thinking has changed in a different way and a person has become able to show his own initiative and produce ideas. Realizing that everyone's imagination is different, each individual wants his personality to be respected, which means he needs to respect the individual plans and ideas of others.

There is an observation that tediousness is more characteristic of such professions as teacher, professor, lecturer. Their job is to repeat the same material over and over again and teach others. In order not to let boringness creep in, you need to look for ways to make your work more exciting. For example, look for additional new interesting information on the topic, conduct dialogues with pupils (students), this way you can protect yourself from boring quality.

A boring person is always easy to distinguish from others. If, for example, you come to a birthday party where a bore is among the guests, the most cheerful group will try to stop talking to him. By what signs can you distinguish a boring person?

How to recognize a bore in yourself?

Tests to determine whether you are boring are not very popular. Still, there are few people who want to recognize the bore in themselves. To be honest, in a bad mood or after a hard day, many of us become not very pleasant people. But if you are avoided too often, accused of being intrusive, or called a boring person, try answering 15 questions. Perhaps a certain amount of tediousness is still present.

  1. In conversation, do you use the words “I think/I don’t understand”, “I always/I never”, “I hate”, “I insist” too often?
  2. Your jokes only make you laugh, but does other people's humor seem primitive?
  3. Are you convinced that only frivolous people are capable of spontaneous actions?
  4. Until you express your point of view to the end, is it impossible to interrupt you?
  5. When meeting with an acquaintance, do you prefer a detailed conversation to a short dialogue?
  6. Are you trying to explain obvious things to others?
  7. Do you always prove that you are right?
  8. For each argument of your interlocutor, do you have several counterarguments?
  9. Do you listen to your interlocutor with half an ear, don’t let him finish, and don’t try to understand his thoughts?
  10. Do you condemn what others admire?
  11. Do you prefer to talk rather than listen?
  12. Do you care whether your interlocutors are interested in the conversation?
  13. Do you prefer to control everything, even the fun?
  14. Are people around you reluctant to accept your help?
  15. Are you rarely called upon in company or are they completely ignored?

Try to answer these questions truthfully and only to yourself. Even better, answer in front of a mirror and watch your facial expression, posture, and gestures. Later, in society, you can play any role. But be honest with yourself. The more positive answers you have, the higher the likelihood that you are not the most pleasant person to talk to.

There is another way to find out the degree of tediousness: directly ask your friends about it. Ask them to speak out, but make it clear that you won't be offended. The method is tough, but effective. If the answers bother you, then it's time to work on yourself.

Take the test: introvert or extrovert?

Main signs

Firstly, a boring person is someone who has serious communication problems. He does not feel (and in some cases does not want that the interlocutor with him is bored and uninteresting, that he is annoying the interlocutor. It is worth noting that this concept is quite subjective. For example, for a young womanizer, a boring person is anyone who does not adhere to riotous and in this regard, he will consider 99% of the population as such.However, it is still possible to identify several criteria by which real bores differ from others:

  • They try to find hidden logic in everything and everywhere.
  • They are constantly fixated on some subject and can talk about it for hours.
  • In his conversation, the bore gives an endless number of different details, always going into detail.
  • He is also inclined to correct his interlocutor, and often does this in the presence of other people.
  • He does not notice that his interlocutor has been feeling bored by the conversation for a long time and would like to stop it or at least somehow revive it.
  • A bore has a passion for teaching others how they think they should live.
  • Often uses the phrases “but here we have...”, “in my time...” in conversation.
  • He loves to shock his unfortunate interlocutor with some foreign word or scientific term, and when he sees misunderstanding in his eyes, he launches into detailed explanations.
  • Even during a romantic date, he will not hesitate to take out a adding machine and divide the amount between two people, accurate to the penny.
  • If the interlocutor had the imprudence to joke or somehow show irony, the bore will still strive to convey the truth to him.
  • A boring person tries to attach a negative connotation to any question, even the most innocent one. For example, in response to a compliment, “You look great today,” he or she will respond, “What, did I look terrible yesterday?”

Can lifestyle be a sign of tediousness?

Some people who lead a lifestyle that is too correct, in their opinion, mistakenly consider themselves bores. For example, they do not smoke or drink, visit fitness clubs, and eat only healthy foods. They also carefully filter out information for themselves - for example, they do not watch television shows that are boring for them, preferring this pastime to visiting a theater or a classical music concert. They do not start reading modern literature without first reading the classics.

Can they be classified as boring? In most cases, no. A boring person is not one who leads, but one who constantly judges others for smoking, drinking or not forcing themselves to exercise. If someone leads a healthy lifestyle, but does not judge others for their choices, this is a sign that the person is not a bore.

Disappointed Man Syndrome

Sometimes it seems to be simply a character trait, a specific personality trait. On the one hand, this cannot be denied, but on the other hand, tediousness is a symptom of an interesting psychological mechanism. It is a signal that a person has experienced a collapse of illusions in one or more areas of life and is now psychologically stuck with this regret. A boring person is, first of all, one who, for some reason, is disappointed in his life.

He is constantly in a state of deep disappointment and all he can do is constantly whine. After all, he can’t change anything. For those who are wondering: “What is a boring person?” — we can offer a rather original version of the explanation for this phenomenon. This is, first of all, someone who does not want to take responsibility for their condition and life in general. He is literally bursting with a feeling of disappointment in the whole world, and therefore he expresses his condition in whining and tediousness.

Additional categories

What does a boring person mean and are there additional types of boring people within this category? All whiners have one main feature in common - they are constantly fixated on one thought, and in communication they do not know how to make compromises. They are practically impossible to re-educate, but scientists believe that it is quite possible to get along with them. Psychologists distinguish the following types of bores:

  • Rigid-aggressive - they are too stubborn and prone to displays of aggression. If you want to finish watching a series, but you're a boring football player, all attempts to change the channel for a few minutes will be doomed to failure. However, this stubbornness gives them significant advantages in the career field.
  • Melancholic people - the basis of their tediousness is anxiety. He demands attention to himself in order to be calmed down. If, for example, you are going on vacation and there are still five hours before departure, he will already be worried about the possibility of being late to the airport, simultaneously asking questions about whether you forgot to take medicine, a razor or other items. The positive quality of such bores is loyalty. They are so preoccupied with worries that they simply will not notice that someone is flirting with them.
  • Hidden bores - they are not inclined to express the problem directly. They are dissatisfied with their whole life - the state, salary, weather, and take it out on loved ones. The positive quality of such a bore is his attention to detail.

Advice to loved ones

If you want to help a loved one who suffers from the desire to constantly teach, complain or pester with questions, you should not tell him directly: “You are a bore!”, This must be done carefully, noting the excessiveness of some of his traits and manifestations.

You can show him how not to be a bore:

  • invite you to a fun holiday, a trip, a hike;
  • give an active pet;
  • ask to communicate (play, take a walk) with the children.

Animals and small children are spontaneous and unpredictable, and communicating with them brings a lot of joy and fun. And when traveling and on holidays, a person understands that life is good even when it is unpredictable and full of new events.

What does a real bore look like?

Those who would like to see what such behavior looks like will be happy to watch a video about the most boring person in the Comedy Club - “In the office” (“Fired for being boring”). In this scene, Garik Kharlamov plays the head of the enterprise, and Demis Karibidis plays the most boring subordinate. The video will appeal to all humor lovers, and at the same time it will help to get an idea of ​​what a real whiner looks like. Sometimes you can find another name - “The most boring person in the enterprise.” After watching this video, recognizing a bore from your environment will not be difficult. However, even keeping in mind the described signs of tediousness, you can easily identify representatives of this category of the population.

Good day, dear readers. Today we will talk about how to get rid of boredom. Surely, in the environment of every person there is at least one bore, and maybe among relatives, it is possible that you too had to notice characteristic manifestations in yourself. That is why this article will be very relevant.

Characteristics of a bore

Boring is a negative character trait of a person that casts him in an unpleasant light. A boring person is an uninteresting, tedious and boring person.

Some people may not even realize that tediousness is inherent in them. If you have doubts, you assume that you have such a quality, then you can verify this by reading the following statements that characterize a bore.

  1. If you ask such a person “how are you?”, he will begin a long story about everything that happened to him over a long period of time.
  2. Everything starts to piss him off: food, people's appearance, the weather.
  3. A person is completely fixated on the fact that only he knows the truth and will try to argue this with various arguments and words. I am sure that he is the most educated.
  4. There is a need for total control.
  5. He constantly interrupts people, doesn’t let them speak, wants to put in his “two cents.”
  6. Likes to speak out, does not like to listen to the interlocutor.
  7. The use of words such as “always”, “hate”, “never”, “adore” is typical.
  8. The desire to be different from others, to be different from them. The goal is not to preserve individuality, but to indicate superiority over other people.
  9. Inability to read between the lines. A person does not recognize the hidden meaning of statements.
  10. The person doesn't like to have fun. Unable to respond adequately to jokes. He has no sense of humor. A boring man or woman may laugh at jokes, but only at his own. Moreover, in strangers, he tries to find a meaning that is not there, and then spends a long time discussing it.
  11. A strong need to teach people around you and point out their mistakes. Gives examples of correct behavior in a given situation.
  12. A boring woman or man does not know how to listen to other people’s opinions, because she is only sure that she is right.
  13. The ability to turn something insignificant into something very important and think about it for a long time.
  14. When he begins to speak, he notices that the interlocutor is distracted and does everything to avoid communication with him.

If you recognize yourself in at least a few points, most likely you are a boring person.

When can tediousness come in handy?

The desire to get to the root cause of the problem and bring the result to perfection, strict adherence to instructions, meticulousness, scrupulousness - all these qualities can irritate others. But they are also in demand in many professions where an impatient person will never succeed. Perhaps one of the professions that requires pedantry will suit you:

  • Accountant.
  • Safety Engineer.
  • Controller or instructor of standard control.
  • Statistical control specialist.
  • Editor.
  • Neurosurgeon.
  • Software tester.
  • Flaw detection engineer.

A profession that suits your personality will help reduce the degree of pedantry in everyday life. And also - to build a successful career where others are even afraid to approach. Famous perfectionists have worked in professions that require attention and clarity: American entrepreneur Bill Gates, actors Meryl Streep and Harrison Ford, 33rd US President Harry Truman, Japanese writer Haruki Murakami.

conclusions:

  • A bore is a person prone to pessimism who bores others with his arguments, specific humor and stories that are interesting to him alone.
  • It is impossible to re-educate a bore, but you can learn to coexist with him.
  • A simple but effective way to recognize a bore in yourself is to directly ask your friends about it.
  • Boredom is annoying in everyday communication, but it helps to achieve success in professions that require attention to detail.

Take a character test

How to get rid of boredom

  1. Try to radiate as little negative emotions as possible. Realize that no one is interested in listening to stories about your difficult fate and problems. Try to put yourself in the shoes of your future interlocutor, would you like to communicate with a person who is dissatisfied with everything? Learn to control yourself, filter the information you reproduce. Do not try to tell a person about the negative until he himself becomes interested in the events in your life, and even if this happens, you should not immediately throw out all the problems, you need to carefully present the information.
  2. Remember that it is unacceptable to be intrusive; few people like it. If you are communicating with a person, you don’t need to try to talk about yourself, try to listen to him.
  3. Don't get hung up on details when communicating with other people. If they tell you about something, you don’t need to try to delve into the details or ask questions about the little things. Listen to the storyteller's main idea.
  4. It is unacceptable to point out the mistakes of other people while pointing out that you are right. Even if you really are more intelligent and educated than your interlocutor, there is no need to demonstrate this. By such actions you humiliate another person, indicating that his place is lower than yours. In addition, in principle, it is unpleasant to listen when you are constantly corrected and corrected every word you say. But it may turn out that you are completely wrong in your comments, then you will also disgrace yourself.
  5. Be attentive to the person you are communicating with. Pay attention to the intonation, gestures, and gaze of the interlocutor. This way you can notice when you start saying something wrong and you stop being interesting. If a person’s eyes shift, he is distracted, then it’s time to end your conversation, otherwise he will avoid communicating with you in the future.
  6. The problem with many bores is the desire to tell the same story over and over again. The trouble is that a person is not interested in hearing the same thing in a new way. In addition, if you decide to embellish some facts, it will be noticeable, then they will begin to treat you as a liar. Train yourself to only tell something new and interesting, and besides, you need to speak concisely. If you have nothing to say, then it’s better to just remain silent and let your interlocutor start the conversation.
  7. Take jokes easier, try to cultivate your sense of humor. There is no need to find fault with the narrator, even if you don’t understand the joke - just laugh for the sake of decency.
  8. Control yourself, don’t find fault with every word your interlocutor says, don’t try to correct him, saying that he puts the emphasis incorrectly or something like that. Accept that everyone is unique, everyone has their own characteristics, including in speech, you don’t need to cling to anything. Appreciate that everyone has their own point of view and everyone has the right to it.
  9. Develop your imagination, broaden your horizons, and don’t be afraid to listen to the opinions of others. It is possible that when communicating with someone, you can learn something new or something that can cheer you up. Understand that a full-fledged dialogue can produce a normal exchange of information and allow you to spend time with pleasure.
  10. Don’t sit within four walls, realize that a person who goes nowhere cannot develop, he sees nothing, learns nothing. It is important to attend various events, go to concerts, the theater, cafes, communicate with other people, and exchange useful information. In addition, spending time together will allow you to get closer to another person, and there will be an opportunity to make new acquaintances.

Now you know what the signs of boredom are. It is necessary to understand that a boring person becomes an uninteresting interlocutor, which means that his number of friends decreases and the quality of social communication decreases. If you have to communicate with a bore, then it is better to agree with his opinion than to try to prove that you are right; you will not achieve anything anyway. If you begin to notice characteristic signs in yourself, it is better to do everything to get rid of such a character trait, then life will take on new colors.

Fly agaric, squeaky, bukhito, mozgoklyatina, buktila, annoying, whiner, bastard, burdock, burdock, pestered, melancholy, sour, skreakushnik Dictionary of Russian synonyms. bore noun annoying resin itching bothered Dictionary of Russian synonyms. Context... Dictionary of synonyms

nerd

- an unbearable bore... Dictionary of Russian Idioms

M. and f. 1. decompression reduction A boring, annoying person. 2. Used as a blasphemous or abusive word. Ephraim's explanatory dictionary. T. F. Efremova. 2000 ... Modern explanatory dictionary of the Russian language by Efremova

Bore, bores, bores, bores, bores, bores, bores, bores, bores, bores, bores, bores, bores (Source: “Full accentuated paradigm according to A. A. Zaliznyak”) ... Forms of words

nerd

- zan uda, y, husband. and wives ... Russian spelling dictionary

nerd

— (1 m and f); pl. zanu/dy, R. zanu/d ... Spelling dictionary of the Russian language

nerd

- and, well. 1) stagnant Nudge, tight. 2) About boring people... Ukrainian Tlumachny Dictionary

Y; m. and f. Razg. reduction A very boring and annoying person... Encyclopedic Dictionary

nerd

- an affectionate person... Thieves' jargon

nerd

- s; m. and f.; decomposition reduction A very boring and annoying person... Dictionary of many expressions

Books

  • Bore, Altana Shoyzhilova. Valya Zueva and her father, after being deceived by scammers, are forced to move to a new city and enroll in a new school. Having entered the eleventh grade, she sees no need to make friends and... e-book
  • Vitaly Vasyanovich about detecting lies and the “Bore” project, Dmitry Goblin Puchkov. ...audiobook
  • The greatest bore on earth. For those who hate holidays, Anna Peycheva. “You can’t be such a bitch! Learn to enjoy life!” How many times have you heard this? Oh, if only I knew how to learn this... Kesha, a timid sales consultant, a typical introvert, decided...

The most famous definitions of nerds

actually two.
First: a bore
is a person who, when asked “how are you?” begins to tell how he is doing. And second: the one to whom it is easier to surrender than to explain that you don’t want...

In dictionaries like Dahl, bore

is generally absent, but there is a PEDANT: m. pedant f. French a strict, precise, picky petty mechanic who demands adherence to appearances, roundaboutness, and order in business; a heavy and stubborn follower of the once accepted, one-sided order; a self-confident scientist who inappropriately demands from everyone the same view as himself. Very smart!

My grandmother, from some Siberian village dialects, also retained the definition of a bore of the extreme, superlative degree, super bore: she called them “sknipa”. Subsequently, I found out that in the Baikal village a mosquito was called a sknipa, while Dahl defined a sknipa as a louse. In any case, the image is clear: something clingy, unpleasant, which is difficult to get rid of.

I would add a few more essential details. Firstly, a bore is not able to highlight the main thing and distinguish it from the secondary

, so he finds fault with some not very defining, unimportant moment of your statement, clings to some verbal inaccuracies and begins to verbosely refute, or, on the contrary, complement and develop.

Secondly, it is completely devoid of the concept of relevance, context and situation

.
Where a topic is discussed humorously and frivolously, he begins to develop it at the level of an academic dissertation. In polite communities they tolerate him and yawn, but in more informal ones they can even send him away, which is why he is offended: after all, in fact
he is absolutely right. But in this case, no one needs this truth. This ends with a happy outcome only if another bore takes part in the conversation, then they close on each other and leave the others alone.

And the most important thing, and in general, probably obvious, is the lack of a sense of humor

, or even, more generally, the inability to think abstractly. Moreover, such people, due to their meticulousness, scrupulousness and perseverance, can achieve significant success in their professional activities.

* * * In the age of the Internet, nerds are flourishing and triumphant. Why? Yes, because “in real life” a bore can get a rebuff, we won’t go into details (depending on the cultural layer), and besides, in real life you can simply avoid him: do not invite him, avoid him, etc. In open Internet forums and blogs, this is not so easy, because the circle of communication is much wider, an invitation to join the conversation is usually not required, and there is enough time to write a long text. In addition, bores have the ubiquitous Yandex, Google, etc. at their fingertips.

How to recognize and identify bores? They will find themselves.

But the bore does not sleep! Rubbing his hands, he unleashes a barrage of indignation on you: why is the role of Raj Kapoor not reflected and where is his detailed biography? Do you know the physiology of lacrimation? Like twice two, he will prove to you that you are ignorant, because you grossly do not understand the sacred meaning of the Indian spot on the forehead (a three-hundred-page summary of the issue follows)…

Particularly sophisticated specimens, sobbing passionately, will begin to refute the thesis that sentimental films are made only

in India (it doesn’t matter that you didn’t write or mean this at all!) and give examples of
non-Indian
sentimental films.
It will be a real attraction if a second person like him comes to the same topic and objects: no! They make good films in India too! - why would the first sophisticated one go into a frenzy and bring up a thousand more arguments in defense of the fact that sensitive films are made not only in India! The second one, already in full excitement, will bring five pages of links about what unsentimental
films are being made in India! - and then bullfighting develops without the participation of the bullfighter...

A special highlight and decoration of the situation is the appearance of a fountain specialist

, who is filled with righteous anger about your failure to reflect the basic principles of fountain construction and the problems of fountain construction. He is not able to understand that you used the word “fountain” in a figurative sense.

Do nothing, sit and wait: the enemy of the fountains

as a wasteful use of water resources, while in dry countries there is not enough water for basic needs. Here, be vigilant: you need to quickly ban a couple of pique vests who will come to explain to everyone that the arid countries are to blame themselves, they should not watch Indian films, but carry out water. Proud patriots, inappropriately excited by the proof that WE have just enough of everything in our foreheads, and his constant companion with the comment “cut off the horns first,” must be sent there. Ban, ban and ban. Political discussions must be nipped in the bud to avoid political incorrectness and hassle.

Moreover, you don’t have time: you need to fight off a Feng Shui specialist

, which strictly indicates where exactly the fountain should be located and politely sends
a blonde
asking where to get a set of DVDs with films...

In general, sometimes you can get pleasure from boring people. The main thing is to relax in time. Because if you don’t relax, you may explode when you read the question on the fifth page of the discussion: what are Indian films?

* * * And in conclusion - the most important thing: how not to be a bore yourself. Here everyone, of course, frowns and puffs out their cheeks: who, me? Well, I’m definitely not... I’m definitely not! Yes, you, reader, you. And I. We are all boring sometimes. For example, it’s time for me to finish my note. And urgently run to the encyclopedias: prepare for claims regarding Indian fountain construction. From those who did not understand that this is not about films or fountains. Oh, why didn’t I take something else as an example?...

(c) K. Yu. Starokhamskaya

PS I'm definitely a bore. And you?

Types of tediousness.

There are no methods for calculating the tediousness coefficient. Still, there cannot be a constant definition of “average” or “full-fledged” boring, accepted for all times, for all nationalities, countries and peoples. But there is such a thing as “psychological compatibility.” It helps to simplify your life and, if desired, build a relationship with a bore.

Conventionally boring people can be divided into several groups:

A persistently aggressive bore is stubborn and self-centered. Anger, irritability, rejection, rage are his constant companions. He is “explosive and unrestrained”, achieves his goal by any means and thereby builds a dense fortress around himself. It is better for such a person to immediately obey or flee.

A melancholic bore is immersed in soul-searching, endless reasoning, and doubt. He is characterized by high anxiety, suspiciousness, and indecision. He subconsciously demands consolation, but does not believe any arguments. The best means of communicating with such a person are subtle humor and patience.

The boring accuser skillfully hides his character under the mask of dissatisfaction with loved ones: wife, children, parents. Dissatisfaction is expressed in constant nagging and searching for a “scapegoat.” Such behavior, unfortunately, extinguishes romance and sexual attractiveness. If you plan to live with such a person, you will have to learn to distinguish between personal quibbles and global issues.

The boring perfectionist doesn't hesitate to ask meticulous questions and knows instructions and brochures from various authorities by heart. He loves to teach and share information, so communication can be quite useful. If you don’t want to read the rules for filling out the form, you can ask a “know-it-all” for advice.

The boring cutie always sticks her nose into other people's affairs, but does it with childish spontaneity. Sometimes his naive but persistent questions drive the interlocutor into a stupor, irritate, and cause negativity. But the cute bore doesn’t notice anything, so you should treat him like a child.

A boring gossip knows everything and always shares his knowledge with others. He retells in detail the actions, words, gestures and details of clothing of the person he is talking about. At the same time, he adds his own conclusions and expects the same details from the interlocutor. The best way out is to avoid communicating with such a person. After all, in five minutes he will go to discuss you.

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