8 simple rules on how to learn to speak beautifully and confidently in any situation

The ability to speak beautifully and competently express one’s thoughts is required not only by actors, television announcers or lecturers. Every person from time to time is faced with the need to speak in public. This could be a presentation of a new project at work, business negotiations with partners, or congratulations to the birthday boy among friends.

Many people are afraid of such situations because they do not know at all how to speak confidently and do not know how to do it. But don't despair, because this skill can be developed.

Speak slowly

Speech often reveals the speaker's excitement. One clear indicator is speaking too quickly. It doesn't just tell others that you're worried, it lets them know that you can't control yourself.

In everyday life, monitor the speed at which you speak and adjust it if necessary. This way you will learn to notice that you are starting to chatter and control it. When speaking in front of a large audience, try to maintain your usual speaking pace in a calm environment. This will put your listeners at ease and make them feel like you want to connect with them and also make them feel confident. In addition, speaking slowly will give you more time to think about your next sentences.

Tongue Twisters

Tongue twisters are one of the simple and effective ways to improve speech clarity. Start by saying simple tongue twisters, such as:

  • Merchandisers lied - samovar sampling was disrupted!;
  • De-ideologized, de-ideologized, and pre-ideologized;
  • He reported, but didn’t finish his report; I completed my report, and I did.

Then move on to more complex tongue twisters. For example:

The fast talker quickly said quickly, That you can’t quickly talk all the tongue twisters, but you can’t over-speak all the tongue twisters, But, having quickly spoken, he quickly said, That you can’t talk all the tongue twisters, but you can’t over-speak.

Once upon a time there lived three Chinese: Yak, Yak-tsedrak, Yak-tsedrak-tsedrak-tsedroni. Once upon a time there were three Chinese women: Tsypa, Tsypa-drypa, Tsypa-drypa-drympamponi. They all got married: Yak to Tsypa, Yak-tsedrak to Tsypa-drypa, Yak-tsedrac-tsedrac-tsedroni to Tsypa-drypa-drympamponi. And they had children. For Yak and Tsypa - Shah, for Yak-tsedrak with Tsypa-drypa ​​- Shah-sharah, for Yak-tsedrak-tsedrak-tsedroni with Tsypa-drypa-drympamponi - Shah-sharah-sharah-shironi.

Your goal is to learn how to pronounce all sounds correctly and as clearly as possible, and not just scribble tongue twisters at a frantic pace. First, speak the tongue twister slowly, assessing the sound pronunciation, then gradually increase the tempo each time. When you achieve perfection in this technique, you can complicate the task. Before pronouncing the next tongue twister, put a few walnuts in your mouth.

Enter after a break

One of the surest ways to offend your interlocutor or at least lead him to unpleasant thoughts during communication is to start speaking immediately after he has finished the next phrase. This gives the impression that you were impatiently waiting for your turn to speak and were unlikely to listen to the other person at all.

When communicating with people, pause for a second or two after the speaker has finished speaking before responding. Not being in a rush demonstrates your confidence and gives your remarks more authority. In addition, this example is contagious: take your time - and others will behave the same way.

How to overcome uncertainty and fear of speaking

You can overcome stress during a conversation or speaking in front of an audience using simple tips:

  • if you are standing, do not lean on one leg. Position your body so that the support is on both legs. Don't place your feet together as if you were standing at attention, but place them a short distance apart;
  • if you are sitting, place your feet a short distance apart, bend them at the knees, and place your hands in front of you. Do not sit on the chair too deeply or, conversely, on the edge. Do not put your feet under the chair or cross them;
  • keep your back straight, straighten your shoulders, do not lower your chin, but do not raise it too high;
  • watch your hands. Do not move objects, do not click the pen, do not hide your hands. Gesticulation should be moderate and calm;
  • try to look straight into the face of your interlocutor, do not look away even when you are asked uncomfortable questions;
  • feel the line between confidence and self-confidence. Self-confident and arrogant people unwittingly cause rejection among their interlocutors.

As you can see, anyone can learn public speaking. If your job involves communicating with people, you definitely need to work on yourself, increase your confidence and sociability. This will help you not only in your professional activities, but also in life.

Avoid filler words

Words constantly creep into our speech, designed to fill the voids. From time to time various “a”, “yes”, “that means”, “in general”, etc. slip through. We ourselves rarely notice them. But your interlocutors almost always notice and conclude that you are not confident in yourself.

A reliable way to catch filler words is to make an audio recording while communicating with someone or public speaking. If you find yourself unwittingly filling in gaps in your speech with these words, count how often this happens by listening to the recording. Focus your efforts on breaking the habit. When you hear a filler word pop out of your mouth once again, slow down or pause.

What does it mean to “speak beautifully”

To speak beautifully means to speak clearly, intelligibly, with the correct intonations, with moderate emotion, so as to convince the interlocutor or interlocutors of the correctness of one’s reasoning and conclusions. A person who speaks beautifully is said to have the gift of eloquence or oratorical ability.

Eloquence can be natural or acquired. With natural everything is clear - some people have it by nature. Acquired eloquence is oratory, or the art of eloquence, which needs to be learned. Nowadays it is taught in all kinds of trainings. And it arose in ancient times in ancient Greece, where the first schools for teaching the art of eloquence appeared, and gradually developed into a science - rhetoric. In public speaking classes, both before and now, they teach how to turn ordinary speech into oratory.

The purpose of a public speaking speech is not only to convey certain information to listeners, but also to convince them that they are right in order to motivate them to take further action. The speaker, with his speech, must evoke an emotional response in the listeners, a special psychological mood, therefore it should not be monotonous, uncertain, or with unclear articulation. His thoughts must be lively and bright, and he himself must be ready to share them with his listeners - only then can his speech be called beautiful.

As the French writer-philosopher Voltaire said:

“A beautiful thought loses its value if it is poorly expressed.”

Get rid of common phrases

In modern speech there are many ubiquitous but empty phrases, for example: “sorry”, “what I want to say”, “this is my opinion”, etc. Most of them, among other things, demonstrate your doubts. By using such phrases, you seem to apologize for what you said. And why should people continue to listen to you after that? Such statements usually come out when you are nervous about other people's reactions to what you are communicating. Therefore, speak, avoiding such “apologies”. Then you won't have to clarify that this is your opinion. Which, by the way, will sound weighty and authoritative.

Exercise to find your chest voice

And yet, how to make your voice more sonorous? This exercise will help you in this matter. Start humming at a tone that is comfortable for you. Move the tone a little lower and pay attention to how your breasts feel. Hum until you feel vibration in your chest. Keep humming and try to increase the vibration. Then raise the tone a little higher, pay attention to how your nose and mouth feel. Open your mouth. Hum until you feel vibration in your tongue and lips, behind and above your mouth. Continue humming and try increasing the vibration again. Finally, return to your chest one more time. Repeat the entire exercise, always ending with your chest, to develop a full, rich sound.

Adjust the volume

Speaking loudly to demonstrate confidence is a common mistake. In reality, speaking in a raised voice only makes listeners conclude that you do not respect them. In addition, speech that sounds like shouting is unpleasant. Rhythmic organization of speech and the correct pitch of intonation help to be heard during a speech, especially in front of a large audience. How well you control your voice can be determined by analyzing audio recordings of your performances. Draw conclusions every time and keep practicing.

Stand up straight

In addition to your smile, your posture affects your speech. Good posture is essential to speaking confidently. When you stand up straight, you can breathe deeper, which allows you to control your body and observe the rhythm of your speech. Plus, body posture makes it easy to gain confidence even when you don't have it.

Strike a superhero pose. To do this, stand straight, hold your head high, place your feet hip-width apart and distribute your weight evenly. Lift your chest, push your shoulders back and relax them. Avoid rocking, pacing, or tapping—all of which distract listeners from what you're saying. Remember to practice striking a superhero pose while looking in the mirror.

Difficulty influencing another person or group of people

Renowned psychologists also call this the “manipulation problem.” This situation is the main reason for the general failure and, as a result, the uncertainty of conveying one’s thoughts. The problem is solved in two ways. The first says that a person needs to be “bought”, verbally forced to listen to you. This is achieved by creating interest in the interlocutor to agree with you. The second method is the use of psychological pressure, the result of which, most likely, will be the speech suppression of your opponent and, conversely, the appearance of additional courage in you.

Relax your body

Nervous tension most affects the muscles of the jaw, neck, larynx and shoulders. Meanwhile, these muscles are responsible for the tone of your voice. Relaxing them is essential if you want to sound confident. Start with deep breathing. As you exhale, open your mouth slightly, relax your jaw and let out the air as if you were groaning. Swing your arms from side to side, stretch your neck, and move your jaw to release any tightness in those parts of your body. If you feel tension in these muscles during your performance, focus on relaxing them.

Innings. Speech and diction training

It is pleasant to listen to a person if he speaks melodiously, loudly and at the same time pronounces all sounds correctly.

How to develop melodic speech

Monotonous speech without pauses and at the same pace will not make you an interesting speaker. Using different intonations, changing tempo and pauses, you can diversify your speech and make it easier for your interlocutors to understand. The same phrase pronounced differently will be perceived differently.

The famous American vocal coach Roger Love claims that on average people use 1.5 tones in their speech. To make speech perceived as melodic, he recommends using at least 8 tones.

In more important places, the tempo of speech can be slowed down, and in order to give the speech an emotional coloring, the tempo can be accelerated. Pauses are needed to place emphasis and give interlocutors time to comprehend what they heard.

To develop melodic speech, you can use chants, which vocalists use to warm up their vocal chords.

In order for you to be able to hold the attention of your interlocutor with your speech, you need to learn how to use intonation correctly. For example, if you use a downward intonation at the end of each sentence, the other person may think that you have finished speaking. To prevent this from happening, instead of intonating down, you can raise your voice up, or stay on the same note.

How to learn to speak louder?

Roger Love advises setting your voice volume as if you were speaking to someone standing behind you.

It's worth remembering one thing. If you increase the volume but continue to speak monotonously, this will be perceived as aggression. Perhaps in some cases this technique will be useful, but there is no need to abuse it.

There are exercises that will help you increase the volume of your voice without tearing your vocal cords. From the video you will learn what “voice on support” means and how to use it to sound louder.

How to sound louder. Voice on the support

Exercises for developing speech and diction in adults

Diction is the clear pronunciation of sounds in accordance with the phonetic norms of the language. Expressiveness of diction is an important aspect of the skill of an actor, singer, or performer.

You can determine diction disorders yourself (by recording your voice on a voice recorder), or by contacting a speech therapist. Diction disorders are most often associated with underdevelopment of articulatory muscles. These are the muscles you use when speaking.

There are many exercises for the development of speech and diction in adults, used when pronouncing different sounds. In this article I will list just a few of them:

  • Smile so that your teeth are not visible;
  • Smile so that your teeth are visible
  • Pull your lips out with a tube;
  • Move the lips extended like a tube left and right, rotate in a circle;
  • Inflate both cheeks, then inflate the cheeks one by one.

Radio host Vera Shakhova shared 6 rules for clear diction:

  1. Don't mumble under your breath;
  2. When you speak, open your mouth wider;
  3. Train your articulator muscles (using the exercises described above);
  4. Read aloud;
  5. Smile when you talk;
  6. Practice tongue twisters.

Vera talks more about each rule in this video:

How to learn to speak correctly and beautifully? 6 rules for clear diction

Breathing exercises for speech and diction

Breathing can be divided into two types:

  • Thoracic (the diaphragm is almost not used);
  • Abdominal (the diaphragm is activated).

Movement of the diaphragm during breathing
As mentioned above, in order for speech to sound louder, the voice must have “support.” The diaphragm serves as this support. Breathing exercises for speech production are performed in order to switch to the abdominal (diaphragmatic) type of breathing, learn to take a short inhalation and a long exhalation, and learn to distribute this exhalation over the required amount of text. Read more about this type of breathing here.

Alexandra Kazakevich, founder and presenter of the School of Eloquence, suggests performing a set of 10 exercises regularly (every day) to establish speech breathing. It takes 5-7 minutes to complete:

  1. Starting position - lying on your back, hand on your stomach to control the movement of the diaphragm. Focus your attention on the solar plexus. Take a smooth breath through your nose. Make sure that when you inhale, only your stomach rises. Hold your breath for a few seconds, then exhale very slowly with the sound “SSSSSS”. Repeat 5 times;
  2. Starting position – standing, back straight, shoulders down. Place a lit candle at mouth level. Take a deep breath through your nose so that only your stomach moves. Then exhale slowly with the sound “SSSS”. During exhalation, the flame should not fluctuate. The task is to exhale as long as possible. Make sure that the diaphragm remains in one position as you exhale. The stomach should not retract. Repeat 5 times.
  3. Starting position – standing, back straight, shoulders down. Place a lit candle at mouth level. Take an active, deep breath through your nose. Hold your breath for a second, then exhale sharply onto the candle with the sound “HHAA!” The task is to blow out the candle. This way you will learn to control the force of the exhaled air.
  4. Starting position – standing, back straight, shoulders down. The mouth is open. Imagine having hot food in your mouth. Inhale and exhale through your mouth, trying to “cool” the food. The inhalation should go into the stomach, not into the chest.
  5. Starting position – standing, back straight, shoulders down. Try breathing like a dog in hot weather: open your mouth, stick out your tongue, and quickly inhale and exhale through your mouth.
  6. Starting position – standing, back straight, shoulders not moving. Imagine that your hands are frozen. Take a deep breath through your nose (the air goes into your stomach), then “warm up” your hands with your breath. The exhalation should be smooth and slow. You can keep one hand on your stomach to control the movement of your diaphragm. Repeat 5-7 times.
  7. Starting position – standing, back straight, arms down. Inhale through your nose (the air goes into your stomach), at the same time raise your arms up, hold your breath for a couple of seconds, then, as you exhale, lower your arms through your sides with the sound “SHSHSHH”. Repeat 5-7 times.
  8. Starting position – standing, back straight. Inhale through your nose. Then, leaning forward as if pumping up a tire, exhale with the sound “SSSS”. Return to the starting position. Repeat 10 times.
  9. Starting position – standing, back straight, hands on your belt. As you inhale, turn your body to the right, and as you exhale, return to the starting position. Same thing to the left. Repeat 8 times in each direction.
  10. Say each stanza of the poem “The House That Jack Built” below in one breath. It may not work the first time, but don't be discouraged. If you do these exercises regularly, you will definitely learn.

This is the house that Jack built.

And this is wheat, Which is stored in a dark barn In the house that Jack built.

And this is a cheerful tit bird, Which often steals wheat, Which is stored in a dark barn In the house that Jack built.

Here is a cat that scares and catches a tit, Which often steals wheat, Which is stored in a dark barn In the house that Jack built.

Here is a dog without a tail, Which tugs a cat by the collar, Which scares and catches a tit, Which often steals wheat, Which is stored in a dark barn In the house that Jack built.

And this is a hornless cow, Who gored an old dog without a tail, Who rips a cat by the collar, Who scares and catches a tit, Who often steals wheat, Which is stored in a dark barn In the house that Jack built.

And this is an old gray-haired and stern woman, Who milks a hornless cow, Who butted an old dog without a tail, Who rips a cat by the collar, Who scares and catches a tit, Who often steals wheat, Which is stored in a dark barn In the house that Jack built.

And this is a lazy and fat shepherd, Who scolds a strict cowshed, Who milks a hornless cow, Who butted an old dog without a tail, Who rips a cat by the collar, Who scares and catches a tit, Who often steals wheat, Which is stored in a dark barn In a house that Jack built it.

Drink water

When speaking in front of a large group or participating in a long discussion, do your best to stay hydrated. The vocal cords are sensitive to the lack of fluid in the body, which significantly affects their functioning. Remember to drink clean water regularly throughout the day and always have some on hand when performing. This will strengthen your voice and make you feel confident.

Use your chest, not your voice

Now that you understand the difference in vocal tone, we need to make sure that your voice is projected correctly. This will help both to make your voice louder and to create a dominant, authoritative voice. There are two vocal projection environments: your chest and your head. The chest voice uses the diaphragm to speak. This produces a more resonant, deeper and more attractive tone that it contains. They can literally cut through loud environments without shouting or straining. The head voice uses your throat to speak. This creates a thin, light and annoying tone. It will not carry far and this is the reason for situations where a person struggles to be heard. He then compensates by screaming, which actually harms his vocal cords.

Make eye contact

It is sometimes advised to get rid of excessive worries during a speech by looking towards the back of the hall. In fact, the speaker’s gaze “over their heads” sharply reduces the audience’s attention to him. Another technique works effectively.

When speaking in front of a large group of people, take turns making eye contact with individual audience members. Fix your gaze on each person for at least six seconds, then move your eyes to someone who is in another part of the room. Do not return your gaze to people you have already looked at. This technique gives your listeners the feeling that you are speaking specifically for them. At the same time, many, meeting the eyes of the speaker, begin to smile or react positively to the speaker in some other way. This allows the latter to feel confident.

What prevents people from speaking beautifully?

The importance of mastering the art of eloquence does not require proof. However, many people experience fear when they have to speak in public or talk to strangers. Such fear in psychology is called “logophobia” (or “verbophobia”). It is curious that, according to research by psychologists, the fear of public speaking ranks second among people after the fear of death.

People suffering from such a phobia are terrified of speaking not only in front of a full audience, but also in front of a small group of people. They feel hot and cold, they begin to tremble, stammer, and cannot concentrate. This phobia has psychological and physiological causes.

Psychological reasons are associated with the fact that a person does not believe in himself, in his abilities, knowledge, experience, that his speech will be of interest and he will be able to hold the attention of listeners.

As for the physiological factor, as we know, in dangerous situations, the human adrenal glands begin to release the stress hormone adrenaline into the blood, the action of which is aimed at consolidating all protective forces. The same thing happens when a person is nervous before a speech or some kind of conversation.

However, adrenaline motivates a person to take physical actions, such as running, during which it is consumed. When performing or having an exciting conversation, there is no such physical activity, so adrenaline is not fully used, and its excess only causes harm. As a result of strong excitement, instead of a brilliant performance, the result may be uncertain and crumpled.


The ability to speak confidently is extremely useful and can be useful for those who want to improve their relationships with others, advance their careers, and share knowledge and ideas with other people. You can learn this skill just like any other. And you can hone it only in the process of training.

Certain techniques that you need to know how to use allow you to gain confidence in your speech. So, you should speak slowly, enter into dialogue after a short pause, avoid filler words and common empty “apology phrases,” control the intonation and volume of your speech, use silence and deliberately break up phrases using pauses.

It is also important to understand that the quality of speech is greatly influenced by the physical condition and sensations of the speaker. Therefore, for a successful performance, you need to monitor your bodily reactions. During it, you should take the correct posture, use appropriate gestures and smile, breathe deeply and measuredly, relax the body, especially the muscles of the jaw, larynx, neck and shoulders, and drink clean water if necessary.

One of the essential components of a confident performance is interaction with the audience. To maintain it, you need to thank the audience for their participation in the event, alternately establish eye contact with individual participants, and focus on what is happening here and now.

Text: Tatyana Turbal, Illustrations: Konstantin Amelin, Photo: Photo by Miguel Henriques on Unsplash, Source: https://medium.com/@georgejziogas/how-to-speak-with-confidence-to-absolutely-anyone-17aff65c37ef

Why do you need to speak beautifully?

Speech has always played a huge role for humanity, because it is a means of communication and thanks to it, the thoughts of one person are transmitted to another.

There is a proverb:

“You are greeted by your clothes, but you are escorted by your mind.”

And a person demonstrates his intelligence (or lack thereof) precisely through speech. That is why it can be called a person’s calling card: whether he wants it or not, his speech reflects his essence.

As the ancient Greek philosopher Socrates said to one constantly silent young man:

“Speak so I can see you.”

And the Persian poet Saadi wrote:

“Whether you are smart or stupid, whether you are big or small, we don’t know until you say a word.”

People who can speak beautifully and express their thoughts clearly have always been valued. This is indicated by the existence of schools of oratory in ancient times. And the ancient Greek sage Skilef noted that “Eloquence is more valuable than money, fame and power, for the latter are very often achieved through eloquence.” He was echoed by the American politician Daniel Webster, who lived many centuries later: “Take from me everything I have, but leave me my speech, and soon I will gain everything I had.”

The French emperor and commander Napoleon believed that a person who cannot speak beautifully will never make a career.

Nothing has changed these days. Employees who master the art of eloquence advance their careers much faster than those who do not know how to correctly express their thoughts. Moreover, it often happens that smart and knowledgeable employees suffer from tongue-tiedness, who do not understand that it is precisely this that makes their further career growth unlikely. Of course, professionalism, knowledge, skills and experience are very important, since no one needs non-professionals.

But those who have experience and knowledge, but are not able to convey them to the listener, explain, prove, convince and change their minds, will someday definitely have big problems. After all, the higher the official position of an employee, the more often and more he has to communicate with colleagues, subordinates, clients, etc. Therefore, he definitely must be able to logically and clearly express his thoughts, influence his interlocutor and convince him.

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