What a real woman should be like according to men

Communication and interpersonal relationship specialist Steve Nakamoto knows what women want and can answer many other questions that concern them. He tells how to become attractive to men.

An honest male perspective: variety is the spice of life and love. The more aspects you have that attract men, the more interested they are in you. Be sure to show different sides of your personality to the men you date. This way you can avoid a serious problem - boredom.

I used to love carrot cake with cream cheese frosting. That adoration faded, however, when a popular grocery store near my home, Trader Joe's, started selling carrot cakes for just $2.49 apiece. For six months I bought several pies every day. Naturally, over time I grew tired of them.

Sometimes we find that the hunger we once felt—whether physical or emotional—has been satisfied, and new ingredients must be added to maintain our appetite. No matter how strong the initial desire is, after a while we become bored with what we longed for.

General requirements

Men are quite demanding of their partners. They have their own idea of ​​what a real woman should be. In their opinion, it must certainly have the following characteristics:

  • to be feminine and gentle, which manifests itself not only in appearance, but also in behavior;
  • be able to love your partner ardently and passionately;
  • be able to love not only your partner, but the entire world around you;
  • be wise and reasonable in all situations;
  • have a certain zest that gives a unique personality;
  • be flirty to attract attention, but not cheeky;
  • be able to create a warm and cozy atmosphere around you;
  • respect yourself and have self-esteem;
  • have interesting hobbies and constantly expand your horizons.

This is far from a complete range of requirements that determine what a real woman should be like in the opinion of men. And there is no point in rebelling against them. These are not some male whims. Every woman who strives for the ideal must make these demands on herself and work on herself in this direction.

A real woman, what she is. What a real woman she is

Modern realities place many demands on the fair sex. What is she like, a real woman of the 21st century? A pragmatic businesswoman, a skilled housewife, an ideal mother or a magnificent lover? In order to get her prince these days and take her rightful place in society, a woman must successfully cope with completely different roles.

A little about real men

Any girl has a clear idea of ​​what a real man should be and offhand can name a dozen necessary qualities (responsible, kind, smart, caring, sexy, honest, hardworking, strong-willed, patient with women’s whims, etc.). That is, the epithet “real” belongs to a rare male specimen, endowed with all possible advantages.

However, dreaming of such a gift of fate, not every lady thinks about how to become a real woman in order to match the best of men.

Commandments and qualities of a real woman

  1. The characteristics of a real woman always begin with the most important quality - femininity - a unique combination of softness, tenderness and defenselessness. This is the main tool of beautiful ladies, forcing a real man to show his best and strongest qualities.
  2. A true woman is attractive with her special state of mind - calm confidence in her irresistibility. Her appearance, social status and age are deeply secondary things here. Loving yourself and enjoying life is an art. The one who owns it becomes a real magnet for the opposite sex.
  3. Next to a real woman, a man feels like a hero. He falls in love not with the woman herself, as such, but with his feelings that he experiences next to her. For the sake of her admiring eyes, he wants to become an example of masculinity and courage, to care for, help and protect this fragile and vulnerable creature. A woman who knows how to evoke such feelings is always surrounded by fans.
  4. A true woman knows how to saturate everything around with love. She generously shares her kindness, warmth and joy, and the world around her reciprocates.
  5. You want to stay longer in a real woman’s home, because it is always cozy, beautiful and comfortable.
  6. A true woman will not compete with a man for the right to lead in a couple. She will not remake him in her own way, criticize and emphasize his shortcomings. On the contrary, she values ​​her chosen one very much and in every possible way supports his faith in his own strength.

What a real woman should be able to do

The main mission of the weaker sex is to delight, inspire and create comfort.

To implement this program, a real woman must successfully cope with the following tasks:

  • dress with taste and always look well-groomed;
  • be an interesting person, with a broad outlook, varied hobbies and a developed sense of humor;
  • be able to hold a conversation in any society and on any topic;
  • cook at least several dishes perfectly;
  • raise children;
  • understand people so as not to waste yourself on unworthy objects;
  • appreciate and gratefully accept help and care.

How a real woman behaves

The concept of a “real woman” presupposes good manners and knowledge of the rules of etiquette. A lady can be recognized by her graceful gait, natural smile, impeccable posture, smooth movement of her hands, and soft manner of speaking. She always speaks to the point and to the point, avoiding slang expressions and, of course, rude language. Screaming and swearing are in no way compatible with a charming and mysterious person. She does not have to justify her inability to restrain her emotions and flaws in her upbringing with magnetic storms or PMS.

To be a real woman means to be aware of yourself every second, not allowing the slightest manifestation of promiscuity. “Miss Perfection” copes with troubles jokingly and does not waste time on grievances. She herself does not slander others and does not take gossip about herself seriously, because she has complete order with her self-esteem.

A real woman in a relationship

The role of the main “builder” of harmonious relationships in a couple belongs to the woman, because by nature the stronger sex copes better with achievements in the outside world. But this does not mean that all actions in this direction should be one-sided, otherwise the husband will turn into a master and the wife into a slave. Happy coexistence is based on mutual self-giving.

A real woman will not allow herself to “dissolve” completely even in a passionately adored man, because she has other interests in life. When a couple discusses only the affairs of the spouse, then over time the aspirations and desires of his half become insignificant. In such a relationship, the girl overprotects her beloved, controls his every move, annoys him with calls and SMS, causing only irritation.

The other extreme is when a woman is too passionate about career growth, her own achievements or hobbies and does not pay enough attention to her husband. Such an egoist is not interested in his opinion, but, as a rule, confronts him with a fact. Such decisions may concern not only work, but also purchases, gifts, joint recreation, repairs, and the birth of children. In this case, even a very patient man can go to a place where he will be more valued and respected.

A wise woman will always be able to make a man want to change for the better, without overusing the phrase “you must...”. She in every possible way supports his confidence that he is strong and can handle any task. Under the “sensitive guidance” of such a woman, a man will be sure that he solves all global problems of his own free will. If a worthy life partner is next to a real woman, she will not take away his role from him. She will simply allow herself to be a weak woman, and her chosen one to be a real man.

Tastes rarely change throughout life. If a woman manages to preserve the qualities for which a man fell in love with her, then she will always be happy and desirable.


It's no secret that the first impression of a person is based on their appearance. So, speaking about what a real woman should be, it is worth noting the following:

  • when going out (even if it’s going to the nearest store for bread), a woman should look impeccable;
  • It is better to have one beautiful dress and a pair of high-quality shoes than many low-quality things;
  • even following fashion, you cannot go to extremes and remain true to your style;
  • You shouldn’t overuse decorative cosmetics, but you shouldn’t give it up altogether either;
  • if the slightest defects in appearance are identified, he will hurry to eliminate them;
  • a real woman knows how to walk the line between sexuality and vulgarity;
  • It’s better to have one bottle of original perfume (even the smallest one) than a lot of counterfeit scents.

Despite all the talk about the importance of the inner world, appearance is sometimes the determining factor. In order for a man to see and love your soul, he must first become interested in your face and figure.

"Everyone wants to love..."

Remember the famous song by Valery Leontyev? It is no secret that every man, like, in general, any person, wants not only to love, but, above all, to be loved. After all, even the most powerful, powerful, successful and serious people in this world are, at heart, subtle and vulnerable individuals who dream of having someone at home waiting for them, loving them, believing in them and never betraying them. This has been their ideal since childhood, when this “someone” for men was their mother and grandmother. And now it is not at all difficult for his beloved woman to become this ideal. Of course, provided that she strives for this ideal.

What should a real woman be like and what should she be able to do?

Of course, appearance matters a lot, but it's also worth paying attention to some skills. So what should a real woman be like? She should be able to do the following:

  • choose clothes not only for yourself, but also for your man;
  • maintain a conversation in any society and in any situation;
  • understand various fields of art;
  • raise children;
  • prepare delicious and healthy food;
  • remain silent when an extra word spoken could lead to a scandal;
  • capitalize on your weaknesses.

As you can see, becoming a real woman is no easier, and sometimes more difficult, than becoming a good specialist in a particular field.

What does "femininity" mean?

After studying Ozhegov’s dictionary, you will learn that femininity is softness, tenderness, and elegance. Many people do not have these traits, while others deliberately refuse them. Example: a girl who dreams of getting married really wants to become feminine. A person who has 100 people under her command is trying to look confident and stern.

Wikipedia says that you can become feminine by having a number of certain qualities: tenderness, emotionality, fidelity, fragility, sincerity.

If you ask any man whether he likes faithful, gentle women, he will probably answer positively. Fragility and emotionality are less in demand. More often, a man looks at external attractiveness, which is part of femininity. Usually such girls evoke a feeling of awe and respect. They try not to swear in front of them; they want to protect them and show care.

Many of us understand that becoming feminine means gaining strength. Quality does not need to be artificially portrayed - it is given to women by nature, just learn to develop it.

What should a real woman be like and how should she behave?

A real woman must have certain behavioral skills. In this regard, the following requirements are put forward to it:

  • a woman should watch what and where she says, and not chat incessantly;
  • You should avoid swear words, even among close friends;
  • you need to be restrained even when there is unbridled fun or a loud scandal around;
  • You should never raise your tone, shout or swear (it’s better to remain proudly silent, thinking about a plan for further actions);
  • You can be capricious sometimes, but know when to stop.

A woman's behavior is a kind of military strategy. Only by choosing the right line can you achieve success.

How to develop feminine energy: practical tips

Femininity is not just an outer shell. Loose hair, long dresses, fresh manicure and matching lipstick are good, but the core is completely different. It is in your sense of self. Agree, there are women who are elegant and attractive even in a wide sweatshirt, jeans and a ponytail. And there are those who are not helped by a dress from the latest collection, a clutch handbag and a luxurious hairstyle. Without a live look, the shell loses value.

How to develop femininity and sexuality within yourself so that these sensations do not depend on external circumstances?

Meet well-groomed friends

And relax over a glass of red semi-sweet, and share women’s secrets, and get enough of each other’s energy... Meetings with friends allow women to adopt each other’s useful qualities and behavior, notice sexual notes and bring them into their lives.

Conversations about lipstick colors, terry robes and famous food bloggers... Why not? Sometimes a conversation about nothing heals better than any psychologist!


Developing femininity through dance is a very good choice! Learning to express sexuality in your movements is a valuable skill for both seducing men and developing your body. Thanks to dance practices, the feeling that the body is “wooden” and tight disappears, and a feeling of flexibility, pliability and plasticity appears. The movements are more relaxed, and with them the sense of self.

Experiment and focus on your feelings: what movements “turn me on” and make me feel sexy?

Take care of yourself

Make face and hair masks, go for manicures and massages, buy beautiful lingerie and accessories. Visit doctors regularly, get basic tests, and get an ultrasound. The feeling of health and fullness is directly related to femininity!

Don’t forget about the “internal” content: watch good films, read books, listen to lectures and take master classes on personal development.

Make time for yourself

Excessive social activity, continuous communication and work issues... If you spin in this whirlpool, you can lose energy and feel like a broken vase, and not a fulfilled woman.

So, take a mini-vacation from time to time. You don't have to go to the Maldives... Go to the spa, take a walk in nature, turn off your phone, try practicing a vow of silence and just be alone with yourself.

It is in moments without fuss that feminine nature awakens!

Head of the family

Despite the fact that the man is considered the head of the family, it is the woman who determines how strong the bonds will be. What qualities should a real woman have to become a homemaker? We are talking about the following:

  • a woman must be loving, able not only to take, but also to give warmth to others;
  • she should radiate kindness, compassion and be able to forgive both minor and major mistakes;
  • a woman should show wisdom and patience in all life situations;
  • you need to have the skills of a real psychologist in order to be able to find a way out of even the most difficult family crises;
  • whatever one may say, family life is inextricably linked with numerous household chores, and therefore, among other things, a woman must be hardworking;
  • As the head of the family, wife and mother must be fair and honest.

As you can see, it is not the man, but the woman who is the head of the family. Playing so many roles, she does not allow the family hearth to go out.

Should I look for a man?

When a woman lives in the Feminine State, questions like:

  • Where can I find a real man?

And a couple hundred more ordinary women’s questions...

She doesn't build relationships - she creates them. She does not educate or teach men how to live - she admires and thanks them for their wisdom and masculine strength. She enjoys herself and the world around her.

And at the same time, she lives not in dreams, not in the astral plane, not in meditation, but in real life. Every day.

Laws of the ideal woman

Striving for the ideal, it is useful to know what a real woman should be like. In the eyes of a man, you will be the best and most irresistible if you follow the following basic laws:

  • Under no circumstances should you complain about your “difficult female lot.” A woman should be happy and proud to be who she is.
  • Regardless of age, take care of your appearance and look 100%. It is not true that women say goodbye to their beauty early.
  • Don't pamper a man too much with your attention. He should be the one looking after you, not you looking after him. Bringing your husband breakfast in bed is only permissible on his birthday or if he is unwell.
  • You should not be interested in other people's affairs and, especially, solve other people's problems if you are not asked to do so. Better get yourself a couple of hobbies.
  • Never admit that you made something for yourself. It is unlikely that anyone will appreciate your art, but rumors will spread about your difficult financial situation.
  • Even if you don’t like a certain boyfriend, you shouldn’t distance him too much from you. A real woman is always surrounded by men, which makes her even more attractive.
  • Despite the fact that most men cannot resist a woman's tears, you should not use this weapon too often. Save it for a special occasion.
  • You shouldn’t trumpet your merits publicly. It is better to demonstrate your virtues in practice.
  • Don't be afraid of change. They are simply necessary for a woman. If you are satisfied with everything both at work and on the personal front, then change your wardrobe more often.

Being a real woman is a complex philosophy. You should not think that such abilities are inherent in beautiful ladies from birth. This is the result of hard work and life experience.

Assess your strengths and weaknesses right now

Take a couple of minutes and rate (“5” - excellent, “4” - above average, “3” - average, “2” - below average, “1” - very weak) how pronounced each of the five facets of your feminine nature is. Analyze your results and determine what your strengths and weaknesses are as a romantic partner.

If, for example, your greatest strength is being “cute,” then the next time you meet, show your full kindness and warmth at the very beginning of communication. Notice the effect of being unafraid to immediately show off your strengths.

Now remember which of your friends clearly expresses those aspects of their personality that are not sufficiently developed in you. Try to communicate more with these people, notice their behavior. This way you will soon form the missing facets of your character.

The main thing is to identify and evaluate your strengths and weaknesses. Then make a firm decision to strive for excellence through acquiring new knowledge and applying it in practice. And over time, you will be able to give yourself at least a solid “B” on all five points. You will increase your self-esteem and learn how to arouse long-term interest in men in you.

Keep in mind that some men may find one or more aspects of your personality more attractive than others. As your relationship develops, make sure these facets come into sharp focus. But don’t forget to reveal all the rest for mutual satisfaction and development.

Why is it better to be a woman than a man?

We often hear about what a real woman should be like through the eyes of every man. The fair half of humanity seems somewhat dependent and not as perfect as the representatives of the stronger sex. However, women have many advantages, which are expressed in the following:

  • they have acute intuition, which allows them to subtly feel and understand what is inaccessible to a man;
  • they are attractive and can achieve a lot with their beauty;
  • they produce children;
  • much in this world is provided specifically for them - fashion, cosmetics and everything related to the beauty industry;
  • no matter how heated the argument may be, it is enough for a woman to shed a tear and she will be the winner.

Of course, looking from the outside, we can say that it is much easier to be a man. But it is unlikely that any lady will agree to swap roles and bodies.

Female condition

The Feminine State is the state of a happy woman, filled with joy and self-love.

What is included?

  • Loving your body and accepting your body.

I once said just one simple phrase: “A woman doesn’t owe anything and doesn’t need anything, she does what she wants” - and the brains of most women who heard this simply exploded. They wanted to somehow combine the male lifestyle and female happiness.

I understand them completely. But moles don't fly, and planes don't travel well on highways. They are meant for something else. A woman can make a good man, but only a woman can make a Real Happy Woman-Queen, a Woman-Goddess whom you want to worship and whom you want to love.

Such a woman is given flowers and gifts.

And this is not a fairy tale or a movie. This is a real tangible state that can be achieved.

For the sake of that moment when the lights of joy and happiness begin to flare up in the extinguished sad eyes of beautiful women - at first timid and timid, and then more and more bright and flaring - it is worth working.

And there is another huge bonus of the Female State...


How many demands are placed on the fair sex in the modern world! Unfortunately, this is an objective reality. In order to win your place in the sun and get your prince, it is important to be a real woman. This refers to a combination of beauty, style, intelligence, wisdom, many skills and character traits. A woman should be different - weak, strong, a housewife, a breadwinner, a lover, and a good conversationalist. In fact, playing all these roles is not as difficult as it might seem at first glance. The main thing is to love yourself, believe in your strength, and then the world around you will reciprocate.

Develop femininity with your beloved man

For a man, a woman is the personification of softness, tenderness, kindness and care. And these qualities are manifested in everything: from gestures and voice to actions and views. But it is impossible to express yourself as a woman if you do not accept the masculinity of your partner. Don't try to play his role.

Let him open a can of food, choose a restaurant for dinner, pay for your dress, solve problems with buying a closet.

Psychologist's advice

Questions about how to learn femininity and how to become very feminine concern many girls and women who are deprived of male attention. Some people want to radically change their style, but they are stopped by not knowing where to start and what should happen in the end. I always warn against the main mistake, saying that you don’t need to choose an idol for yourself and blindly focus on it. It is much more useful to take a closer look at many famous ladies who are standards or to create the desired image for yourself, bringing together the qualities that you want to possess. And then it’s a matter of technique, perseverance and self-love.

It's worth trying:

  • eradicate the habit of crying and complaining about fate;
  • enjoy every day and find only good things in it;
  • develop self-control and self-control;
  • show respect to others;
  • do not lead the matter to an argument or quarrel;
  • communicate with pleasure;
  • take care of your appearance;
  • control behavior in society;
  • do not overwhelm your interlocutor with your intellect, maintaining a casual conversation;
  • eliminate defeatist and sad thoughts;
  • be satisfied with yourself and your life.

A small amount of coquetry, sincere interest in communication without intrusiveness and a slight flair of charm will not go unnoticed. And then she has the right to decide for herself whether she is interested in continuing the conversation or whether she should unobtrusively end it.

Ask a question

What is femininity?

It can be external and internal. To create an appropriate image, you will need to consider the main directions.

  1. Figure. Standards of beauty have changed over the centuries, sometimes beyond recognition. From the Paleolithic Venus, who did not have a face, but had the widest beards, a massive chest and a complete absence of a waist, fashion reached boyish forms and a state of semi-exhaustion. The ideal male half considers an hourglass shape with pronounced breasts, a thin waist and seductive hips. But it is worth remembering that each person subconsciously has his own ideal, so there are definitely connoisseurs of curvy hips, graceful hands or a snub nose. But it is important that the figure is fit in any case, which will be helped by the feminine figure glorified by poets and impeccable posture.
  2. Hair. Surprisingly, one of the mandatory elements for men is long, well-groomed curls. It is best if they are natural color or a shade close to it.
  3. Makeup. The best option is when it is practically invisible and only favorably emphasizes the natural attractiveness. Deliberately drawn arrows, eyelashes touching the tip of the nose or lips with a blood-red hue of arterial blood are more like the ritual mask of an Indian on the warpath. Yes, it’s original, but I don’t want to get closer.
  4. Fashion style. It serves as an excellent tool when it is necessary to become softer and more feminine in appearance, and a woman has a huge arsenal available to her: from lace and ruffles to skirts and seductive blouses. The softness and seductive lines are emphasized by floral patterns, delicate pastel shades, and a reasonable amount of decorative elements that create accents in the right places.
  5. Behavior, gestures and facial expressions reveal hidden thoughts and desires, so you need to constantly monitor them. Evil grimaces, obvious disgust or arrogance can nullify all efforts to create a feminine image.
  6. Emotionality, openness and the ability to empathize are considered the main spiritual signs of femininity.
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