Why does a man make his woman jealous by flirting?

Why does a man specifically cause jealousy? Jealousy is characteristic of people who act as owners or egoists in relationships. There are many reasons for jealousy, but why does a man specifically cause jealousy? This behavior explains the guy’s desire to test a girl’s feelings or to assert himself at the expense of other women.

Love game

Love relationships are, first of all, a couple dance, a game. It’s good when a couple retains playfulness, even after a long journey together. It is the game that brings two different natures together. It is important not only whether people are suitable for each other, but also whether they are able to catch the rhythm of dancing together - the rhythm of flirting. It’s a pity that many partners’ enthusiasm fades over the years. Instead of a fountain of emotions, there remains a puddle of gray routine. A man can make his girlfriend jealous, passionately wanting to return the love dance into his life and feel the delights associated with it. If a girlfriend disdains to share a love affair with him, he will find someone who will respond to his emotional and physical impulse.

How to revive enthusiasm in a relationship?

  • Make eyes at each other, both alone and in company.
  • Use playful gestures—butt slaps and the like. Be a little childish.
  • Have pillow fights, tickle each other, call each other good names.
  • Notice your partner's playful mood in the company and try to pick it up, even if it is initially addressed to someone else.
  • Exchange jokes and phrases among your friends that only you understand. Always sit close to each other.

The desire to dominate.

If a person for a long period experienced antipathy towards others because of the ridicule and bullying of his peers, but once convinced that the problem lay in his head, he began to gradually “drive” into it the idea of ​​his importance, uniqueness and unsurpassability, then the desire to be the best will remain for a long time, but he won’t put those around him in a penny. Why is the husband jealous of his wife here? Because the fear of being deceived and betrayed forces one to radiate hatred, which creates fear in others, in particular in the wife.

Form of behavior in marriage:

  • Can use physical force if his rational will is not accepted for execution;
  • Usually he strives for the top of the career ladder and holds a high position, so he tries to place himself above everyone in the family and, accordingly, provide it with everything necessary;
  • Interacts well, never starts debriefing without a reason;
  • He loves his loved ones and appreciates them, understanding that the world is cruel, he tries to protect them from its sad influences;
  • Raises children by instilling an interest in serious sciences (such sons and daughters are called “Precocious”).

If a wife loves and is afraid of her jealous husband, she will be afraid of unnecessary “body movements”, so she will obey. In such marriages, the man is responsible for everything, the main word is his, the husband does not exert negative influences without reason if everything goes according to his rules. It is not strange that with such a man you feel like behind a stone wall, since he takes care of everyone, and wives are more often housewives, looking after everyday life and children.

Male Ego

Flirting on the side sometimes indicates a guy’s hurt pride. Past grievances, childhood complexes, life failures undermine self-confidence. Some manner of the chosen one, or thoughtless words can awaken in him the feeling that the wrong woman is next to him. Through jealousy, he can consciously encourage his companion to value him more highly.

What does deliberately provoking jealousy mean?

  • He cares. No matter how he behaves with someone whose jealousy he deliberately provokes, no matter what the motives behind it, one thing is clear - he cares. He hasn't lost interest!
  • Checks the reaction. Perhaps this is manipulation. This is how a man finds out whether a woman reacts to him, whether he is capable of hurting her feelings. In this case, it is better to restrain your emotions! Every time something like this happens, you can directly, but calmly and firmly say that this technique does not work.
  • Not sure about her. If a partner thinks that a girl is losing interest in him or that she doesn’t love him, he can provoke a response by flirting with others. This is his way of showing that she might lose him. A simple call for no reason, or a caring gesture, will give him peace of mind and confidence in the relationship.
  • He is offended and believes that he was underestimated. When a relationship breaks down, a man may feel that the woman did not appreciate him. Through provocation, he reminds her of the loss, trying to evoke regret and repentance. Here the fair half needs to decide whether to renew the relationship. Was the breakup caused by misunderstanding or a serious problem? Even if the relationship resumes, the injured man’s dignity can make itself felt for a long time. The sooner he feels valued and loved, the better!

If a guy makes you jealous on purpose

In most cases, such emotion on the part of the lady is necessary for the guy in order to attract attention to himself. He forces the girl to notice herself, to reconsider her attitude towards him.

There are also types who need this feeling. A man may say that a woman is his only love, but in public he does not miss a single chance to court a beautiful stranger. It is simply pointless to give in to emotions, since he just needs to please the girl and nothing more.

It often happens that a young man just wants to unwind - he dances, laughs and talks with another, without even thinking about the fact that at this time the woman does not find a place for herself. Also, don’t stress yourself out and panic – the guy just loves company and treats everyone around him equally. An old friend and a striking blonde may evoke the same reaction in him. Maybe the man is not even trying to force his beloved girl to be jealous.

It is not recommended to leave the situation to chance - it is better to approach your partner and ask what is happening. There is no need to be shy.

If a guy wants to make a girl jealous after a breakup, then this clearly indicates that his feelings have not cooled. He wants to make a woman experience this feeling in order to prove her concern.

Sometimes after a breakup, a guy makes you feel very jealous just to show a new side of himself.

Such dull boredom!

Boredom extinguishes love! The fire of feelings can be extinguished by the cold water of everyday life. Jealousy is to love like oil to fire. Sometimes the reason why a man makes a woman jealous is ordinary boredom. By flirting, he brings new colors into his life and a little spice into a stable relationship. The fire of passion can ignite not only jealousy.

Psychological trauma.

The first pillar in analyzing consciousness always goes to basic psychology. Why are men jealous of women? Here we will answer with a complete list of injuries received in childhood and adolescence, which provoke the appearance of this unfortunate condition.

Situations that provoke injuries:

  1. Father or mother leaving the family, being raised by one parent;
  2. Maternal search and bringing various men to the apartment where your husband lived as a child;
  3. Lack of parental love (misunderstanding, poor interaction, beatings, drilling, low child self-esteem, disregard, lack of attention);
  4. Unhealthy situation in the relationship between parents (scandals, alcoholism, fights);
  5. Lack of friends, good friends;
  6. Bullying by peers is on par with lack of reaction or moral bullying by teachers;
  7. The early search for love (during the period of personality formation) ended in failure (the first girl abandoned her without reason, went to someone else, or cheated on her).

This is a list of the most famous and common reasons for receiving psycho-traumas, which force you to be afraid of losing your existing love, cloud your mind with the feeling of repeating an already passed life scenario.

Recommended reading: My husband is jealous for no reason. What to do?

Unprepossessing appearance

Since a man provokes jealousy with his flirtations, it’s worth thinking about whether it’s time to seriously pay attention to his appearance. Perhaps worries and troubles do not leave a woman time for herself, or she looks good, but always the same. This does not mean that you need to torture yourself with diets, have a radical haircut, or dye your hair pink. You can change your clothing style. For example, instead of trousers, wear a dress, elegantly remove it, or, on the contrary, let your hair down, use new colors in cosmetics.

Isn't it time to change?

  • When was the last time I changed my hair, tried unusual makeup, or bought a new dress?
  • Does he notice that men glance at me when we walk together?
  • Does he brag about me to his friends?
  • When was the last time he paid attention to how I looked? What kind of attention was this - reproach, or admiration?

The idea of ​​idealizing relationships.

Sometimes the psychology of a man’s jealousy can be inexplicable, sometimes you live like in a barracks, all the time waiting for new rules, plans and orders. There are husbands who are pedants (people who want to see the ideal in everything), so, idealizing the concept of family, everything should be according to plan, and if not, a scandal begins, which, by the way, can be followed by divorce proceedings.

A wife must be decent and consistent in everything, she must stick to the plan, if she is 2 hours late after working out at the gym, this is already a reason to think that she was with another man, that is why the husband is jealous, including a different picture of reality in his head, because a woman is not called and did not report the previous delay.

Household interests

Sometimes it seems to a woman that if she cooks deliciously, keeps the house clean and takes care of herself, this is the ultimate in a man’s dreams! A well-established life is important, but it cannot replace interesting, friendly communication.

What can you ask yourself?

  • Is he interested in talking to me?
  • What do we talk about when we don’t discuss problems, work and everyday life?
  • In what areas am I developing and how does he feel about it?
  • Do my achievements inspire his admiration?

Basic Techniques

If a guy decides that his companion no longer needs him, then he can go to great lengths. Sometimes his actions go far, but more often they begin with the following verification elements:

  • delays at work;
  • lipstick on the collar;
  • the smell of women's perfume, etc.

Often, in order to excite the relationship, a man begins to openly flirt with another woman. But such a step is not always justified. Sometimes because of this, relationships become even more impasse or fall apart altogether.

If the partner cheated on her boyfriend or does not hide her interest in another, instead of discussing everything, the partner may begin to take revenge. He does this openly, hoping that one of his ill-wishers will definitely convey the information to his beloved.

Apathy towards sex

Flirting is directly related not only to emotional drive, but also to physical attraction. It happens that accumulated grievances prevent the fair half from liberating in bed. The birth of a child, the illness of elderly parents, hard work, excessive care for household needs, or stress deprive a woman of strength and extinguish her desire. In this case, a man can make his companion jealous because his sexual energy does not find an outlet. He is overcome by the feeling that something is missing in life. This means that you should focus not on flirting, but on the quality of your intimate life.

Is eroticism still present in relationships?

  • How often do bad moods, well-being, or grievances prompt me to avoid sex?
  • Do I like discussing intimate topics with him?
  • Do I know his preferences in bed and am I pleased to satisfy them?
  • Can I openly discuss my sexual desires and needs with him?
  • Do I think about surprises and surprises that could diversify my intimate life?

Why is a man jealous even if you are not dating?

Have you ever asked yourself the question, “Why am I jealous” of a girl I haven’t dated? This means that you want to date this girl. You may not be in love with her yet, but you are definitely interested. Now that you know why people get jealous, you must understand that possessiveness doesn't work for you. You can't attract a girl or start dating her because of jealousy. This will only push the woman away from you. Nobody likes jealousy, although most people become jealous at some point in their lives.

You're jealous because you're not dating her

It's really interesting why guys get jealous when they don't date girls. Not being able to date a certain girl or being rejected can cause jealousy. Moreover, unsatisfied desire irritates a man if he sees the girl he wants with someone else. In this case, men usually think like this: “if I don’t date her, then no one else should.” So a certain girl has to be alone her whole life just because she's not dating you. Or you will be jealous. True love, however, requires you to choose the person you love individually. However, men are often jealous precisely because they are not dating a girl. And they can't help it.

You want to possess and exploit

Are you wondering “why am I jealous?” This is because you want to own and exploit the girl. As mentioned earlier, this is the opposite of love. It would be wise to avoid this approach and have more appropriate behavior. You must behave ethically and let the woman decide for herself. Only then will her decision matter. Moreover, most likely, she will not allow you to control her anyway. More than half of all modern women apply feminist ethics in their lives. You may find a woman who wants to be controlled. The question is, will you like it or not?

You don't express love

Often men get jealous thinking they love someone. However, although love and jealousy go hand in hand, you cannot love and be jealous at the same time. So, for example, if you really like a girl who is dating someone else. You must have the strength to let her go. If you truly love someone to the point of being jealous, you must confront your jealousy and allow the woman to be happy. You really don't want to date someone who doesn't want to date you. It would be insincere and hypocritical. You will not get any pleasure or happiness from this.

You're old-fashioned

You don't have time because you are intent on possessing women or preventing them from being with anyone else. Feminism and women's emancipation are a reality. Women are no longer subservient to men. You have to accept equality and make a woman decide for herself whether she wants to be with you or not. And you must be strong enough to cope. That someone you like might not want to date you. It can be painful, stressful and traumatic, but you have no other choice. So, deal with it and stop being jealous.


Jealousy is a disease. It makes you obsessed with a woman you're not even dating. This is called brooding because your entire existence is focused on a particular woman whom you are jealous of. You are hurting yourself by doing this. It's like seeing a cake in front of you that you can't eat. Imagine someone eating in front of you when you can't get a bite to eat.

Imagine that you are very hungry. That's what jealousy does to you. It is draining and works the same way as stress. In fact, jealousy can lead to stress and depression. So, the next time you ask yourself why men get jealous, keep in mind that they suffer in this way. Suffer because they can't get what they want. Seeing someone else get it just makes things harder. You have no choice but to deal with it for your own sake.

In general, now you know the most important things about jealousy. Men are historically predisposed to jealousy. This is because they have dominated women in the past but can no longer do so. The emancipation of women made them equal to men. Therefore, you cannot and should not attempt to possess, possess, or exploit women. You shouldn't be jealous of a girl you're not dating. This reduces your chances of meeting her. Jealousy pushes people away and causes chaos in relationships. If you're not dating someone you want to date, you automatically become jealous. Confront your jealousy and remove it at any cost.

How to stop suffering

It's not easy to force someone else to change. It's always better to start with yourself. By changing her approach, a woman can find peace of mind and encourage a man to change his behavior.


Sometimes a girl thinks that a guy deliberately makes her jealous, but in reality she controls him too much. Just because people date or live together does not mean that there is no place for friends and personal interests in their lives. Mistrust and constant control can eat away at relationships like corrosion. Not all attention to the opposite sex should be regarded as romantic interest. You need to be able to notice the beginnings of possessiveness in yourself and fight them.

How to test yourself?

  • Do I regularly review his calls, messages, chats and online requests?
  • Am I jealous not only of my girlfriends, but also of my friends?
  • Does it annoy me when he's just having fun with women?


The unloved complex can torture and drive you to despair. Why is it a complex? Because not a single person will waste his spiritual energy on someone who is absolutely indifferent to him! If a guy for some reason makes his girlfriend jealous, it means he doesn’t care about her.

How to convince yourself what to think about?

  • Do I think that he doesn’t love me just because of flirting, or does his whole life—words and actions—speak about this?
  • If I am so sure that I am unloved, why am I still with him?
  • If he didn't flirt with others, would I doubt his love?


Sometimes you are so lazy to change yourself that it is easier to suffer! It's easier to be a victim. You don’t need to do anything, just sit and feel sorry for yourself, blaming others for everything. The victim complex goes back to childhood. It's not your loved one's fault!

What can you do?

  • Workout. Sport gives you a sense of control over your body and life. It's time to stop being a victim and take matters into your own hands!
  • Focus on the positives in the relationship. Spend mental energy on creation, trying to increase your contribution to your life together.
  • Be interested in something other than your life partner. The victim is always at the center of his own universe. Sometimes love experiences consume you completely and cover the whole world. Love should not become a fixed idea! It is important to look around, be interested in external events, abstract topics, and other people.

Reasons for provocation

Depending on the stage of development of the relationship, a representative of the stronger sex may cause jealousy due to the influence of various factors. Flirting on the side often indicates the hurt pride of the other half. It also testifies to the young man’s concern. Regardless of the behavior, one thing is clear - he cares, he has not lost interest yet.

Trying to win a girl

If a serious relationship has not yet begun between a man and a woman, then a representative of the stronger sex can also cause jealousy in the desired object.

This is done to attract attention. By appearing in public with another girl, he makes it clear that he is attractive to women. There is a high probability that the girl will begin to be interested in the man. Mentally she will try to highlight his merits.

Romantic period

Sometimes a man pushes a woman to be jealous when the couple has just started a relationship. In this case, provocations occur for several reasons.

  1. Self-doubt, which can be caused by childhood complexes, past grievances, and negative experiences.
  2. Uncertainty about the feelings of a partner - a representative of the stronger sex has a desire to test them. Believing that the proof will be jealousy shown on the part of the girl, he begins to provoke this feeling. The partner does not necessarily choose another girl as an object. This could be work, a hobby, spending leisure time with friends, etc. This is how the partner shows that the girl can lose him.
  3. An attempt to diversify life - the partner may lack fire in a calm and smooth relationship. He will try to stir up his beloved, deliberately making her jealous. This is often an effective step that increases the intensity of passions. The main thing is that the dosage is correct. After a quarrel, a stormy reconciliation follows.
  4. A way to keep your loved one in good shape. In this case, a man often argues that jealousy is proof of love. If you dose it correctly, then such a step is justified. A woman begins to take better care of herself and tries to give her chosen one pleasant surprises. But at the slightest mistake of the partner, there is a risk of destroying the relationship.

A man can make his beloved jealous even when he does not like the appearance of his chosen one. It happens that a girl does not like to do makeup, wear heels, does not wear dresses, etc. To show his preferences, the young man begins to pay attention to another, brighter personality.

Family relationships

A spouse may also resort to provocations if the wife pays more attention to domestic issues than to him. She believes that she cooks well, keeps the house clean, takes care of herself - and that’s all a man needs. But he may simply lack companionship.

Conversations should not only be about everyday life. The wife should be of interest and admiration to her husband. A spouse can deliberately provoke jealousy when his sexual energy does not find a way out. Your loved one may not be satisfied with the quality of your sex life.

Often, a couple who has been in a relationship for a long time loses their feelings and the partners move away from each other. The wife may try to unwind and spend more time hanging out with her friends. But she must realize that this is a huge blow to her husband’s pride. For a partner, such a situation will not pass without consequences. In this case, the chosen one can show attention to another representative of the fair sex, causing jealousy in his beloved.

Some words or actions of the chosen one can awaken in the husband the feeling that the wrong woman is next to him. Through provocations, he can also force his wife to appreciate him more.

Ex's jealousy

Often a couple breaks up, and the young man’s feelings have not yet cooled down. Then he will try to prove to his ex-girlfriend that he exists perfectly well without her. For this reason, the guy specifically causes jealousy.

According to psychologists, this is just a demonstration when a real revolution occurs in a guy’s soul. He will try to constantly catch the girl's eye. This is also one of the ways to assert oneself, because after a breakup, the assessment of a representative of the stronger sex drops.

Often a man makes his ex-wife jealous. In this case, he can be sure that his wife’s feelings for him have not yet faded away. Sometimes the husband behaves this way if the trial was difficult. Then jealousy becomes the main weapon of revenge.

Often the ex-spouse takes revenge for the unpleasant things that happened in the partners’ life together. If, after a divorce, warm, friendly relations remain, then jealousy on the part of the husband may be explained by the fact that he wants to attract attention to himself. Often this is a desperate step that hints at the partner's desire to renew the relationship.

A look at fidelity, or a fly in the ointment

Now a little about the sad things. Not everything can be fixed!

Sometimes the reason for flirting on the side and retaliatory jealousy is rooted in different views of fidelity among partners. If a man flirts without a twinge of conscience, despite the scenes, tears and persuasion of his chosen one, perhaps this is just the norm for him.

Sometimes feelings connect people with completely different moral principles. Some people consider simple flirting to be a betrayal, while for others, even a temporary affair is innocent fun. It’s good when partners are united by common values ​​and moral perception.

A radical difference in worldview can serve as an alarming signal. In an unequal relationship, both will have to suffer.

It is foolish to expect that love can radically change a person, turn his essence upside down. Sometimes, in order to reconsider values, a person needs to go through a serious shock, or gain considerable life experience. If a person is not going to change anything and does not even understand what they want from him, you can hardly count on harmony in the relationship. It is worth thinking seriously not about how to react to provocative advances, but what to do with the relationship itself.

The reason here is not the woman. Most likely, this is how he views loyalty.

How to understand that the chosen one is a womanizer?

  • These guys really like wavy relationships. The status of the relationship is not entirely clear. The beloved appears with passionate confessions, then disappears for a while, and suddenly appears again. He may demand assurances of love and promises from her, make a bunch of promises himself, but in reality show the opposite.
  • Ex-girlfriends are still counting on a womanizer for a long time. Time passes, he starts a new relationship, but his old connections trail behind him like a train. Probably, former partners still receive assurances of feelings from him and hints about continuing the relationship.
  • The surest way is to see how women treat him. A nice guy with a lot of qualities may be ignored, while the most ordinary guy is universally popular. Why? Women are susceptible to flirting. If all his friends are sure that he likes him, and his co-workers perk up when he appears, perhaps he was flirting, is flirting, will flirt!

When deciding to maintain a relationship with a lady's favorite, it is better for a girl to immediately prepare for the fact that from time to time the chosen one will be carried into the wrong waters.

What should a woman do if her husband provokes her to jealousy?

From a psychological point of view, jealousy is a lack of self-confidence, in one’s own strengths and perfection. So, how to deal with male manipulation of this kind? Having figured out the reasons why a husband still causes jealousy, you should find out how he behaves with other women. Pay attention to how many young ladies he “uses” and tries to “involve” in his “scam”. You can arouse feelings of jealousy by flirting with one woman, or you can simultaneously pay attention to several ladies and act as a womanizer.

What to do when a man tries to make you jealous

If a man is trying to intentionally cause jealousy, it is recommended to remain calm.

First, you should talk to your partner and tell him that his behavior is completely incomprehensible. It is important to speak calmly and not raise your voice. He seeks vivid emotions and scandal, but there is no need to react to this.

Don't repeat your partner's actions and flirt with other guys. Such behavior will cause the formation of additional problems and conflicts. It is important to understand that your partner does not want to have sex with other girls. Its goal is to renew old feelings and emotions.

To avoid repeated attempts to cause jealousy, it is recommended to compliment your partner more often, devote more time to him and try to diversify your sex life.

Ways out of the situation

At this stage, you need to be attentive to your husband’s behavior, his words, and actions. If you notice that he often calls his employees or girlfriends, you should discuss what is happening. There are situations when a husband tries to improve relations with his ex-partner, and even compares his wife with her. In this case, there is no need to endure, and becomes a vest, nodding every time to his reproaches and comparisons. It should be shown that you will not tolerate such behavior and attitude towards yourself, that any conversations about this are inappropriate. Let him not forget that next to him is the same person who is humiliated and insulted by such behavior. Explain to him that the past must leave your home forever!

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