How to insult a person: morally humiliate without swearing, clever phrases to send a cultural message, bring to tears.

There are times when we see the only opportunity to stand up for ourselves in the ability to insult our interlocutor. It is worth recognizing that this method is not always justified, and, at times, can even lead to negative consequences. But there are still situations when it is very difficult to do without it.

Reasons for humiliating a person

All the reasons described here are subjective, because other people may not have the desire to humiliate someone in a similar situation. It is much wiser to draw conclusions from an unpleasant situation than to try to cause harm to another without any real benefit from it. Humiliation of another in moderation can be useful in political competitions, where the moral suppression of an opponent can be a good foundation for the upcoming elections. It is also important to maintain a balance here.

Codependency is one of the reasons for the desire to humiliate another

Here are several reasons for desire to humiliate another:

Emotional dependence. When a person wants to harm another to make him feel bad, he allows the offender to influence his opinion.
The desire to assert oneself. It can be done in two ways: constructive and destructive. Humiliation of another is an example of a destructive method. It is practiced only by people with low self-esteem who have not been able to realize themselves in life.
The ability to defend only by attacking. There are people whose only strategy for defending themselves is to belittle the dignity of others. It seems to them that they are always right, and the bearer of a different opinion a priori has no right to it. May try to humiliate others to hide his weaknesses. As a rule, aggressive people are afraid of everything inside and are so overgrown with thorns that others try to avoid them.
Devaluation of feelings. Often people are afraid to feel warm emotions towards others, so they try to behave more aggressively.
Negative example. When parents in difficult situations try to blame the other and make him wrong, it seems to the child that this is the most reasonable thing to do.

In most situations, it is unreasonable to humiliate other people, especially when it comes to relatives. It’s just that often people don’t think about the consequences. You can become a successful master of cynicism and moral suppression, but ruin your relationships with all the people with whom such a person communicates.

Manipulative techniques with which a person humiliates others are still worth listing, but it is not recommended to use them yourself. They are useful in stopping manipulation by another.

Still from the movie Class

A humiliated person can go to great lengths. An example is the film “Class”, where one student was very harshly pressed, after which he staged a shootout at school. But this happens not only in films. Due to bullying of children in educational institutions in different countries, many children have died.

Important ! A sharp tongue can only be useful to protect the honor of your relatives, boyfriend or girlfriend. Under no circumstances should it be used against them. Sometimes even bringing another person to tears at once can ruin a relationship for life. Then the attacker may regret it, but it will be too late.

How to Learn Sarcasm Using Sassy Funny Words

Having learned to use impudent and funny expressions appropriately, you will certainly be able to gain fame in your close circle as a person with a good sense of humor and mastery of the technique of sarcasm. But it is important not to forget that insolence can be fraught with consequences, and with such phrases you can provoke your interlocutor to an unpredictable reaction.

Go, lie down, rest. Well, at least on the rails.
I could have offended you, of course, but nature has already dealt with it for me.
Nobody scares you, you will be afraid in the mirror.
Your mouth could use a stapler.
Well, you jingled the chain, now go to the booth.

Understanding the art of sarcasm

And yet, it is important to note that people who know how to express themselves in a sarcastic manner do not always use this skill when trying to insult or humiliate someone. Often, sarcasm is used when some non-trivial situation is being commented on - then it looks funny and organic.

It is almost impossible to comprehend the art of sarcasm for a person whose vocabulary is not particularly diverse and whose horizons are rather limited. That is why it is worth reading and learning more. Type into the search: “Authors who write with humor.” As you yourself understand, truly “sharp” phrases are in any case made up of words, the variety of which you can easily glean from intellectual films and books. By the way, examples of some witty phrases can also be seen in books. As a last resort, learn sarcasm from people who make a living from their jokes - we are talking about participants and hosts of various comedy television shows.

If you want to be known as a truly witty person, then do not repeat the mistake that is common to many novice jokers or people who imagine themselves to be such. Having heard or read some interesting joke or funny expression, they periodically repeat it in order to make their interlocutor laugh. The first couple of times it can be really funny, but then people start smiling just out of politeness, and that’s for the time being. As you understand, it is simply unacceptable for anyone to associate a master of sarcasm with a broken record.

What are the ways

How to become a rich and successful person in life - the psychology of achieving success

Often the first thought that arises in a person who wants to insult someone is to go to Google and find phrases to humiliate a person that will allow you to defeat any opponent in a verbal skirmish. There is no such. Moreover, templates can only belittle the person using them. It is necessary to approach this issue creatively. Here are several ways to humiliate a person morally :

Satire, irony and sarcasm. Methods based on mocking exposure of the weaknesses of the person at whom they are directed. The difference between them is the intensity. The weakest method is satire, sarcasm is harsh ridicule.
Metaphors. The humiliated person is compared to an object or item that he associates with something negative. The technique is based on analogy. A classic example of a metaphor intended to insult is calling a person a pig. When using a metaphor, it is very important to understand who comparison with can cause negative emotions. For example, some will find the comparison to a bull offensive, while others will straighten their shoulders with pride.
Intonation. The same words spoken in different tones can lead to different results. Therefore, one of the possible ways to humiliate a person is to tell him “you are the best” with a mocking intonation.
Put a person in a situation where he will be humiliated by others. This method is difficult to perform, but very effective because it can hide the humiliating person.
Verbal Aikido. The most optimal and environmentally friendly option. We must try to elegantly redirect all the negativity that the other person emits towards him. This is an art that requires a lot of practice. But the result is simple - a person humiliates himself with his own words. The person against whom all the negativity is directed turns out to be out of business. A truly strong man or girl does not use ready-made quotes from classmates, but knows how to fend off the attacks of another.

Reminder . These methods are used only in extreme cases. For the most part, they only bring harm, although it may seem to a person that they are of some use, because the suffering of the offender brought moral satisfaction to the offended, but the latter will remain offended.

Phrases and verbal humiliation

Using ready-made expressions or statements may be inappropriate and lead to the opposite effect. In addition, many patterns are already known, so it will not be possible to demonstrate the ability to subtly suppress another person.

Humiliated girl

A competent person is always able to independently come up with a caustic phrase that allows him to reduce an overly inflated heart rate. Here are several templates of cool phrases for humiliation in VK correspondence or in personal conversation, which can be used in certain situations:

Reduce the insulter to the same level. For example, to the phrase “you are an idiot,” you can answer “yes, I have a certificate, but is it wise to prove something to an idiot”?
Reduction to the point of absurdity: “Are you kidding me?”, answer “Are you a rabbit or a dog”?
Press lightly. For example, to the phrase “Are you so smart” can you answer “Do you have difficulty communicating with smart people”? This method is especially good in public discussions, when it is shameful to simply send a message in front of people; you need to ensure that the “interlocutor” shows his weaknesses. Naturally, he will not want to show them and falls into a trap.

Actions

The ideal action to humiliate a person is that there is no action, but the function is performed. The main thing is not to lower yourself to the level of the one whom the insulter is trying to humiliate. Moreover, any actions are doomed to failure (as well as words) if the one to whom they are directed does not feel humiliated.

Humiliation process

The well-known terrorist Salman Raduev was imprisoned with a very strict regime: prisoners were forced to walk in an absurd position and were humiliated in every possible way. When journalists interviewed him before his death, they asked how he was feeling, to which he replied: “Fine.” They were surprised how they could humiliate him so much, to which he replied: “Well, I don’t feel humiliated.” He did everything to maintain self-esteem even in such harsh conditions, and he succeeded. Those who want to humiliate, as a rule, have a very vulnerable psyche, and it is easy to humiliate them.

Important ! We must cultivate psychological immunity in ourselves so as not to allow others to humiliate ourselves.

All the techniques described above are an example of cultural humiliation of a person. They require high intelligence. It is not recommended to humiliate a person in an uncivilized way, because this way you can only lower yourself in the eyes of others.

Books

If you want to learn a little more about methods of psychological pressure so as not to become a victim or to use some technologies yourself, before I move on to useful recommendations, I will offer you several books on this topic.

The first of them belongs to the “Legendary Bestsellers” series. We are talking about the book “The Psychology of Influence” by Robert Cialdini: what means exist, commitment and consistency, mutual exchange, authority and favor. This guide contains softer techniques than I described in this article. The reader will receive much more benefit from them, and I will tell you why a little later.

Another book that can help you solve all your problems without calling the other person names or getting emotional with silence is How to Outsmart Anyone: A Practical Guide by William Poundstone. You can download both of these books on liters.

Moral humiliation of a guy or girl who abandoned

The methods are the same as described above. Doing this is strictly not recommended, because the other person has the right to terminate the relationship unilaterally if he is not satisfied with it. Emotions have nothing to do with this. Everyone is free to do what they want, being responsible for the consequences.

In addition, the desire to morally humiliate a guy or girl who has been abandoned is a sign of addiction. A psychologically mature person easily breaks up a relationship and does not want to take revenge. The logic of a dependent abandoned person is this: “If he feels bad, I feel good.” And it should be like this: “I feel good, regardless of the emotions of the other and what they do to me.” Psychological immunity is very important.

Thus, in most cases, humiliating another is an unproductive method, which speaks of the psychological immaturity of the one who wants to humiliate. It may be unpleasant, but it's true. Even if you humiliate someone, then only in a beautiful, cultured and elegant way, without using swearing, physical force and other methods that characterize the person using them from the bad side.

Content

Strategies
Physical-psychological impact
Moral Suppression
Playing on fears
Books
A couple of tips from a psychologist

Hello, dear blog readers! Man has always strived for power. Many people like to control others, suppress their desires, instill fear so that they become docile. Many of us know how to manipulate people's behavior with the help of positive emotions, but the “dark side” beckons no less.

Even if a person does not intend to use these techniques, he is unlikely to pass by the article “How to psychologically crush a person.” The desire for destruction is as natural as the good ways of humanity.

Many rulers built their policies precisely on the fact that they made the population docile, instilling fear. Society becomes weak and depressed, which means it can be controlled.

Today you will learn what methods of pressure exist, several tactics used in the KGB and other intelligence services, I will offer you several books if you want to deepen your knowledge, and also give a couple of useful tips for those who are going to use all these techniques. In general, it won't be boring.

In the case of children

Psychological pressure on a child is an even more serious topic. Everyone knows how weak and fragile the consciousness of children (most of them, anyway) is. They are extremely easy to influence. And we are not talking about healthy pressure, which cannot even be called such (“If you don’t put away the toys, I won’t talk to you” - influence through guilt). This refers to real coercion to do something, an attack on a child (psychological).

The pressure of the Criminal Code of the Russian Federation in this case is defined as “Failure to fulfill educational obligations.” This is article number 156. Moreover, the provisions apply not only to parents, but also to employees of educational, social, educational and medical organizations. Cruel treatment is what psychological pressure is equated to. The article also prescribes punishments. This could be a fine of 100,000 rubles, compulsory work (440 hours), elimination of the right to hold a certain position, or imprisonment for three years.

But, of course, cases rarely come to trial. The article of the Criminal Code characterizes psychological pressure in a specific way, but in life it occurs in a different manifestation.

Many parents simply unceremoniously interfere in the child’s space, cruelly control his every step, and force him to do something he doesn’t like (going to a boxing class when the child wants to dance, for example). Some are sure that if you point out his shortcomings, he will correct them. But that's not true. This does not work with all adults who have a stronger psyche and intelligence. And the child will completely withdraw into himself, beginning to doubt his own strengths and abilities, and constantly feeling guilty for no apparent reason. Parents, exerting pressure, thus reflect their own experiences and fears. But in the end they become enemies of their child, not allies. Therefore, issues of education must be approached very responsibly. The birth and personal development of a new member of society is a huge responsibility and serious work.

Mobbing at work is the law. Examples of mobbing

“When I was talking on the phone, my boss could say in front of the whole department, why are you discussing recipes there, that’s all you can do, even if I was talking with work colleagues. It's very humiliating." Alisa, 25 years old.
"You can not do it. You haven’t completed any special courses and don’t have any certificates.” Although I know for sure that certificates are not needed to perform this activity.” Marina, 32 years old
“They don’t have the authority or the brains to make decisions. I am your leader, as I said, so you will do.” Olga, 21 years old.
“You’re always late for work, we couldn’t wait for you and made the decision without you. Next time you won't be late. Sleepy." Larisa, 29 years old.

The most interesting thing is that this is only a part of the statements that were sent to me when I conducted the survey “Have you experienced psychological terror or harassment at work?” As a result, 100 people shared more than 2.5 thousand statements and situations. The scale is impressive. Negative statements and constant criticism from both the employer and colleagues, social isolation within the organization, dissemination of false information about the employee, biased assessment of work results lead to a decrease in motivation and interest in work, “freezing” initiative and incentives for an active position in mobbing. -victims. As a result, a person subjected to mobbing may become ill and develop stress. As a result, he will perform his duties poorly and feel psychological fatigue. It has been established that an unhealthy atmosphere in the team, intrigues and disagreements between employees are reflected in financial indicators: labor productivity falls, staff turnover increases, and the team becomes less cohesive.

A couple of tips from a psychologist

We are not always able to recognize the aggressor and the manipulative techniques he uses. However, every person has innate instincts to identify such situations. A long stay in a stressful, conflictual atmosphere has a destructive effect and a person strives to get rid of this pressure.

We must not forget that in such cases it is almost impossible to predict the behavior of a particular individual. No matter how you plan, he may act completely differently. This depends on many mental properties that cannot be predicted. Behavior may not be rational or logical.

Strive to use positive influence and communication to avoid unexpected situations. Don't forget to also subscribe to my blog. Until next time.

Types of psychological pressure

There are several types of psychological pressure, each of which requires special attention to its management and evasion strategies. Let's list the most common types of pressure, and then we'll talk about how to resist them.

The first of them, the most simple and undisguised, is coercion. Coercion can be used by a manipulator who has imaginary or real superiority over his victim. This could be a boss threatening to fire you, or a back-street bandit threatening with a knife. Both are nothing more than coercion.

Humiliation (or humiliation) is the second type of psychological pressure. For him, the manipulator gets personal, insults (probably even publicly), emphasizes painful shortcomings for the victim: appearance, illness, marital status, etc. The most base and offensive words are chosen, which are designed to “crush” the victim of manipulation. How does this work for a manipulator, what would a humiliated person want to do for the person who told him so much? It’s very simple: after the nasty things have been voiced, the manipulator immediately offers a way through which the humiliated victim can rise in the eyes of society - to carry out the proposed assignment.

The next pressure technique is avoidance. In this case, an implicit manipulation is carried out, and when the victim tries to clarify the situation, the manipulator indignantly waves it away. Thus, the victim of manipulation is created with “cognitive dissonance” - an unpleasant feeling that she is doing something wrong. In an effort to get rid of this feeling, a person fulfills any requests of the manipulator.

Suggestion and persuasion are options for using psychological pressure. In this case, the manipulator must have some kind of influence on the victim: either have unconditional authority in her eyes, or be a person well known to her. Suggestion is more focused on emotions. The manipulator may use phrases like “Listen to me, I know for sure...”, or “Don’t you trust my opinion...”, or “I only wish the best for you, so...”.

In this case, the psychological suppression of a person occurs as if out of good intentions, as a result of which the victim adopts the imposed opinion and begins to consider it his own. Conviction is characterized by rationalization, i.e. they try to convince a person of something using the arguments of logic, sometimes quite perverted. The number of arguments, both real and imaginary, reaches such a quantity that the victim’s brain simply gets tired of perceiving the information critically and automatically agrees.

Thanks required. This is a variant of long-term psychological pressure. The manipulator first provides the victim with a service: one that he was not asked for and which did not really cost him anything. He can regularly provide such imaginary “help” to the victim, ingratiating himself with the victim’s trust. The moment the manipulator needs something from the victim, the request to “return the favor” comes into play. The request can become quite intrusive and turn into threats if the victim does not agree to the terms immediately.

Tuning before using speech strategies

The purpose of adjustment is to increase the degree of unconscious (intuitive) trust between the manipulator and the interlocutor. This is achieved by copying the opponent at the time of conversation. I assume that the technique is based on evolutionary heritage: ancient people lived in small groups, so they instantly divided sapiens into “us” and “strangers”. The logic is the same here - the more similarities between the interlocutors, the easier it is for the brain to classify the manipulator as “one of our own”.

An example of adjustment from the film “What Women Want” (2013)

There are four types of adjustment:

under the body: gestures, facial expressions, posture, movements;
to the voice: volume, manner of speech, intonation;
to the rhythm: breathing, blinking;
for speech: characteristic expressions, stylistics.

I took adjustment exercises in acting courses and I want to note: you can’t jump into someone else’s “skin” from a running start. Even after several weeks of practice, the adjustment looked fake and noticeable.

To tune in to your opponent, close your eyes and create an image of him in your head. Compare with the original until you find the perfect ratio.

When adjusting, respect the cultural and corporate characteristics of the environment. It is not at all necessary to put your feet up on the table to copy your boss. If you are a female accountant in a logistics company, squatting next to drivers is also not a good idea.

Start leading your interlocutor. Change your hand movements, minimize the vector of the conversation, reduce the volume of your voice. If you do everything right, your partner will repeat after you. Otherwise, adjust the image in your head again. When you achieve maximum similarity in behavior, start using speech strategies. At the end of the conversation, remove the connecting threads and the conversation will fall apart.

NLP is played out very coolly in the series “The Mentalist”. Tune into any episode from any season to enjoy the charm and manipulative powers of Patrick Jane (Simon Baker).

True NLPer Patrick Jane

How to forget about psychological pressure?

Thanks to psychological protection, a person is protected from negative experiences and discomfort. Defense mechanisms weaken the mental reaction to stimuli and help normalize the state of mind.

Psychological protection protects the individual from nervous breakdown and stress. Her methods differ in degree of maturity. A person resorts to psychological defense unconsciously. He is simply trying to protect himself from shame, anxiety and guilt.

One of the effective methods of psychological defense is “Wind of Change”. The target of pressure may have increased blood pressure, worsened mood, and increased heart rate. In order to get rid of negative emotions, you can mentally see yourself standing against the wind. At the same time, it is worth imagining that a strong gust of wind sweeps away offensive, unpleasant words in its path. This psychological technique is used to restore mental balance.

When choosing the psychological technique “Ocean,” a person associates himself with the ocean. This body of water is quite calm. But a huge number of fast rivers flow into it. An emotionally stable person is in many ways like the ocean. He does not pay attention to the streams of negativity that pour on his head. Such a person is distinguished by external calm, not disturbed by life’s passions.

When choosing another technique, it is as if a person is trying to protect himself from negative words with the help of an “aquarium” that does not allow sounds to pass through. This allows you to protect yourself from negativity. Through the thick glass, the appearance of the offender is difficult to see. It seems distorted. As a result, the opponent begins to seem ugly and funny. Books on psychology can also help you learn the ability to control yourself in difficult situations. Special literature teaches not to give up in the face of existing problems.

VK dossier

Vadim Nikolaevich Kozhevnikov was born in Krasnoyarsk on September 30, 1946. Graduated from the Krasnoyarsk State Medical Institute with a degree in general medicine. Graduated from graduate school at the Leningrad Research Institute of Physical Culture. Until 1982 he worked in medical institutions in Krasnoyarsk. Since 1982, he has been a doctor-psychologist in a comprehensive scientific group that worked with the national teams of the Soviet Union in alpine skiing and luge. He also worked with Major League Basketball athletes.

He completed his PhD thesis at the intersection of disciplines - pedagogy, psychology, physiology. The dissertation is devoted to methods for diagnosing performance in athletes. He defended his doctoral dissertation related to the development of treatment, preventive and rehabilitation programs for people with neurological and neurosis-like disorders. Since 1990 - employee of the psychological and pedagogical faculty of KSU (now Siberian Federal University). Since 1997 – Head of the Department of Clinical Psychiatry.

Author of more than 100 scientific papers. Area of scientific and practical interests: study of psychological mechanisms of human pathologies, development of preventive methods of psychological assistance.