Calm, only calm - how to stop being nervous about anything

In this article I will talk about how to stop being nervous. I will explain how to remain calm and cool in any life situation without the help of sedatives, alcohol and other things. I will talk not only about how to suppress states of nervousness and calm down, but I will also explain how you can stop being nervous in general, bring the body into a state in which this feeling simply cannot arise, in general, how to calm your mind and how to strengthen the nervous system.

The article will be structured in the form of sequential lessons and it is better to read them in order.

The main reasons why we get nervous

Have you seen at least one person who was not nervous? I saw... On TV... It's called Terminator. But seriously, there are no such people. Everyone expresses their emotions through the nervous system, and sometimes there are so many of them and fatigue overcomes that it is simply unrealistic not to be nervous. But here the question arises: are our nerves justified and is it necessary to allow irritability?

When a person loses his temper over trifles, sometimes this is due to bad character. But there are also factors beyond a person’s control that provoke attacks of irritability. They are divided into physiological and psychological. Let's consider the main ones:

1. Insufficient blood supply to the brain due to high blood pressure or atherosclerosis.
2. Hormonal imbalances, for example, due to thyrotoxicosis - a disease of the thyroid gland.
3. The state of menopause leads to instability of mood and increased irritability. Or a hormonal imbalance during pregnancy.
4. Nervousness is a symptom of diseases: depression, anxiety disorder, neurosis.
5. The most common cause of nervousness is nervous exhaustion. And it also occurs for various reasons:

• mental and mental stress;
• constant lack of time;
• a huge avalanche of information every day;
• inflated demands on oneself in order to meet the challenges of society;
• negative experiences;
• features of the life of city residents, for example, untimely delivery of transport, queues at government offices, disruption of public services, etc.

But it is important to remember that nervous tension that does not receive an outlet necessarily accumulates and at a certain moment breaks out in a not very pleasant way. And such a “breakthrough” often ends in neurasthenia with nervousness and irritability, as well as the well-known strokes and heart attacks.

Learn to be aware of anxiety

Despite the seeming banality, this advice is one of the most important. Sometimes it is enough to understand in time that a senseless panic attack is brewing in order to prevent it. If you allow yourself to worry, the experience will grow with every second. And having realized the excitement, you can concentrate on finding the cause. Most likely, it will turn out that the reason is not worth serious stress. You can almost always take control of your own feelings by simply recognizing what event is causing a panic attack.

Super-fast ways to calm down and stop freaking out

Sometimes timely reassurance even saves a life. You say: “How?” For example, you are driving and an unusual situation occurs involving pedestrians on the road. If you don’t react in time and give in to panic, you may end up causing a collision.

Therefore, it is important to know how to calm down in a matter of minutes or even seconds, how to quickly get rid of fear and anxiety. Get ready to learn new skills:

1. Irritability occurs when a person is especially vulnerable. Therefore, it is important to feel support on a physical level. If you see that nervousness is “rolling over” you, find physical support: sit comfortably in transport, lean on the back of a chair, a wall, remove high-heeled shoes or classic shoes if possible, place your feet on the floor for stability.
2. Breathe deeply. Deep breathing helps restore physiological processes that occur during anxiety or irritation: rapid heartbeat, frequent shallow breathing, spasms in the digestive tract, etc.
3. Take a break. This is extremely important - if you need to make important decisions, and you are in terrible discomfort, find a good reason to leave the room. Switch your attention to a flying bird, dripping rain, other natural phenomena, people's behavior, pleasant objects. A pause will help you calm down, and then you will return to the office in a normal state.
4. Find support. This is not shedding responsibility for decisions made in stressful situations. Having found support for your opinion, you will understand that you are not alone in this vast Universe. In any issue that really worries you, try to talk with someone close to you - together it is easier to cope with the problem.
5. We respond tactfully even to rudeness. It is important to respect other people's and your own boundaries. Responding to rudeness with rudeness is the last thing that even a defensive animal can handle. If someone made a sharp attack in your direction, you should gather your emotions into a fist, talk like an adult to a child, instructing, and not throwing mud at them.

Friends, you can contact Sergei Litan, a psychologist and psychoanalyst. It will help if you want:

1. Get out of depression.
2. Bring back the joy in life.
3. Get your inner state in order.
4. Get rid of fears, phobias and panic attacks and much more.

In this article I tell you how I managed to get rid of internal fear and anxiety in just 1 month with the help of Sergei’s advice.

Causes of nervousness

Scientific and technological progress and increasing flows of new information keep us in constant tension. Even teenagers are faced with a huge amount of information to process. It's not always easy to deal with this. The deterioration of the environmental situation negatively affects the functioning of the brain and affects the psyche. The noise that accompanies life leads to increased fatigue, insomnia, and nervous disorders.

The main cause of nervous tension is personal emotions; they make people worry the most. Occurs when:

• self-doubt;
• inability to achieve set goals.

What makes you nervous is the fear of the future, which could leave you without a job and bring illness. Knowledge of human psychology will help eliminate the causes of nervousness.

How to stop being nervous: general tips

Calming down in time and not worrying is an important human skill. He will help you change your life for the better, since such a person will at least be respected.

But not everyone can control and manage their emotions. And here the person is not such a scoundrel, his choleric or melancholic temperament sometimes lets him down + raising “cutes” also takes its toll, when a capricious child is used to achieving everything with hysterics. What kind of adult will he grow into then?

Indeed, this skill is very important and worth training, no matter what your temperament or what kind of upbringing you suffered as a child.

There's always a way out

Understand and remember the main statement: “There are no hopeless situations!” And you will also find a way out of this, even if not right away, even if not the best, but you will live through the situation and everything will “change.” No matter how hard it is for you, remember: everything will pass, and this too.

When you take a philosophical look at life, then it will become easier to accept the blows of fate.

Fight with a song

If you need to calm down here and now, start singing (of course, so that an ambulance won’t be called later - within reason). You sing for yourself to relieve nervous tension - this is a release of accumulated emotions. You can sing in the yard of your house, in the bathroom, while working around the house, so that you enjoy it - no one is going to evaluate your vocal abilities.

Take a shower

Take a relaxing bath if possible - this will help relieve nervous spasms and tension in the body, relax, and physical improvement in well-being will lead to a change in attitude towards the situation.

Wander around on foot

Walking alone will help you quickly relieve nervous tension and organize your thoughts to solve a problem.

Drink some water

This advice helps both in the urgent need to calm down and in order to, in principle, stop being irritated and become calm.

Gradually drinking a glass of water without pills will help restore physical and psychological well-being. Water triggers the self-healing mechanism of cells and organs, and then the entire body. And by the way, drinking water doesn’t always help.

Look, I didn’t even know that washing dishes was so calming! This is a free psychotherapy session that is more effective than calming words! It turns out that any contact with water brings us calm. That's how it is!

Distract yourself by getting involved in something useful

You can stop beating yourself up in a simple and effective way. Urgently distract yourself with something, even if it’s stupid and illogical. For example, read a novel or detective story, do puzzles, play Sudoku, follow someone, or eavesdrop on someone.

When events develop rapidly, you also forget about your strong feelings about work or about your boyfriend and switch to new emotions.

Look for the positive

I write about positivity in almost every article I write. But this is really important! In smart words, searching for the positive in any situation is called “positive reframing.”

For example: “It’s good that the bus left - I can breathe the air longer”, “When would I have had so much fun - and it’s good that I didn’t fly to Turkey, but ended up at the birthday party of the best friend’s best friend’s friend!”, “How great , that you managed to save money on studying during quarantine - and you can study without having to travel anywhere!”

The initiative is in your hands

Sometimes complexes and lack of self-respect prevent you from starting to live in a new way. Therefore, we fight them - we take the initiative into our own hands. To prevent a problem, try to prevent it. For example, if something hurts you, then you don’t need to wait for bleeding - go straight away for an examination.

Take the initiative into your own hands, then neurotic reactions will not arise, because we suffer from the unknown. And initiative will help you not to suffer from it!

Get organized

When a person is nervous, it is important to organize everything - then the brain goes about its usual business and calms down. For example, make a schedule, remove non-urgent matters, try to avoid unnecessary burdens of tasks and responsibilities.

It is also important to put things in order. For me, this is generally a separate topic: keeping track of the children, what they grew up from, what clothes they have for all seasons, what shoes to wear when... But if you have excess nervousness, on the contrary, it’s time to do this, since in such a critical condition you will not accumulate everything is like Plyushkin, but free yourself from ballast. Free up as much space as possible.

Sports activities

Sports activities will help you get rid of unnecessary negative emotions. Adrenaline, a stress hormone, is released through sweat, so a person calms down. In addition, sports activities improve blood circulation, which helps the nervous system work better.

Daily routine and nutrition

The great academician Amosov has this phrase: “We are what we eat.” And this applies to all organs, even the nervous system. If we eat properly, our body receives all the necessary microelements and vitamins. And our nervous system loves them. For example, it is difficult for her to work without B vitamins, magnesium, D3, iron and other beneficial substances. Sometimes that's the only reason we get nervous.

It is very important to maintain a proper sleep schedule. If you don't get enough sleep, then what kind of calm can you expect from your nervous system? I went through this myself: I went to bed very late (after 2 am) and got up early. And what have I achieved? Everything irritated me, everyone irritated me, there was nothing to do at all, conflicts began, which were difficult to resolve - there were not enough resources in the body.

And I’m still silent about other health problems. So, my dears, it is better not to bring yourself to such a state. Go to bed before 23.00, get up around 6.00-7.00. Then you will feel great and less nervous. I won’t delve into biorhythms and hormones - this is a separate topic, just take my word for it that this is the optimal time for night sleep.

Undesirable behavior when experiencing anxiety

How to motivate yourself - set a goal and do everything to achieve it

In a difficult situation, there is no need to blame yourself or others by making the problem worse. You need to accept it and try to benefit from it. Searching for the guilty will not help you calm down, but will add new experiences, for example, when blaming a loved one. This may offend him, which will lead to a quarrel.

There is only one answer to the question: how to be calm in any situation and not be nervous - you need to be prepared for any outcome. You should stop analyzing the expected event, endlessly scrolling through it in your head. It is necessary to calmly consider the plan of action and possible options for what is happening. Having prepared as much as possible, calm down, realizing that there is no further possibility of influencing anything.

It makes no sense to cope with stress with food and alcohol. They will scare you away for a while, then the emotions will return with renewed vigor.

Woman eats stress

Exercises to stop being irritable

Here I have made a selection of physical and psychological exercises. When you are nervous and nervous about any reason, both physical and psychological, as well as all combined, can help you.

We count

Counting to 10 and counting backwards is very helpful for calming down. By the way, I use it very often for my children when they are nervous. You can diversify this exercise: first count quickly, then slowly.

If you can't calm down, try counting to 20 with even numbers only, then with odd numbers only. There are many variations of the calming count. This exercise will help you switch to another activity, while the nervous system “comes to its senses” a little. Often the exercise is used before an exam or before a performance, when you need to go on stage.

Affirmations

Read more about affirmations at the link, I’ll tell you briefly here. These are positive attitudes regarding a certain situation or about life in general. For example, you are nervous after breaking up with a loved one - form the attitude that it was a good experience, and you will meet an even better person.

Or nervousness overcomes you before a date. An affirmation with a specific goal will be useful here - to show yourself “at your best.” Therefore, the best attitude phrases would be: “I am relaxed, interesting to my interlocutor,” “I have a lot of sexual energy and my partner likes me,” and stuff like that.

If you are tormented by nervousness before sex, the best affirmations would be phrases like: “I am very sensual and freely show my passion and tenderness”, “I am open and behave naturally in sex”, “I completely trust my partner, understand his love and give mine "

Mini charger

To stop worrying, you can do mini-exercises for different parts of the body. Some charging elements can be done even unnoticed by others!

1. Move your jaw in all directions at a fast pace - warm up and reduce tension on the facial nerves.
2. Quickly bend and straighten your toes - relaxing limbs that are tense during irritation or nervousness.
3. Lightly tap your chest for a few minutes to relax the thymus gland and reduce the level of stress hormones.
4. If possible, sit or lie down, take a deep breath and try to straighten all parts of your body as much as possible, hold this position while inhaling, exhale and relax. All tensions are removed, the body and nerves are relaxed.
5. Yawn as much as you can. It has long been known that yawning reduces feelings of restlessness and anxiety.

funny breath

When I found out about this exercise, at first I laughed and was skeptical. But after trying it in practice, I really calmed down and now I use it sometimes. Of course, so that no one sees, otherwise it will take a long time to explain what I’m doing!

So, to stop being nervous, you will need to breathe with alternating nostrils. Sit in a comfortable position, take deep breaths and exhales through your right nostril, then through your left. The duration of the exercise is 5-10 minutes, breathe, alternating nostrils. Add visualization to this - imagine that you are inhaling confidence and courage, and exhaling anxiety and excitement.

These basic exercises will help you relax your body and brain, stop getting angry and yelling at loved ones for no reason or no reason, get distracted and restore your nervous system.

Lesson 6. You shouldn’t create any reasons for nervousness at all.

This is a very important lesson. Typically, a significant factor in nervousness is the inadequacy of your preparation for the upcoming event. When you know everything and are confident in yourself, why should you worry about the result?

When I was studying at the institute, I missed a lot of lectures and seminars, went to the exams completely unprepared, hoping that I would pass and somehow pass. In the end, I passed, but only thanks to phenomenal luck or the kindness of the teachers. I often went for retakes. As a result, during the session I experienced such unprecedented psychological pressure every day due to the fact that I was trying to prepare in a hurry and somehow pass the exam.

During the sessions, an unrealistic number of nerve cells were destroyed. And I still felt sorry for myself, I thought so much had piled up, how hard it was, eh... Although it was all my fault, if I had done everything in advance (I didn’t have to go to lectures, but at least the material to prepare for the exam and pass I could provide myself with all the intermediate control tests - but then I was laziness and I was not at least somehow organized), then I would not have to be so nervous during the exams and worry about the result and about the fact that I would be drafted into the army if I I won’t hand over something, because I would be confident in my knowledge.

This is not a call not to miss lectures and study at institutes, I am talking about the fact that you should try not to create stress factors for yourself in the future! Think ahead and prepare for business and important meetings, do everything on time and don’t put it off until the last minute! Always have a ready-made plan in your head, or better yet several! This will save you a significant part of your nerve cells, and in general will contribute to great success in life. This is a very important and useful principle! Use it!

Books

The following books will help supplement the psychologist’s advice on how to cope with anxiety and nervousness:

1. Sarah Devoe “Relax! 100 ways to enjoy life."
2. John Medina “Age has nothing to do with it. How to make your brain think quickly and remember a lot.”
3. Gary John Bishop “Worry Less, Live More.”
4. Ruby Wax “Tame Your Brain!”
5. Virginie Grimaldi “You will understand when you grow up.”
6. Dan Katz “The Lizard in Your Head.” Funny comics that will help you better understand yourself and everyone around you.”

There is also a wonderful video from Mikhail Labkovsky that will help you control your emotions:

Preparing for stressful situations

Increasing your stress tolerance level is one of the ways to calm yourself down and not get nervous. In order not to freak out, you need to be prepared for anything. To do this, be able to control yourself and make decisions.

Need to:

• collect facts;
• analyze;
• decide;
• think coolly.

Breathing exercises used in meditative techniques will help maintain composure.

Routine should not consume you, you need to get rid of it, relax, travel, attend various events. Having a hobby that helps you take your mind off troubles increases your self-esteem and level of stress resistance.

Nervousness at work

In order not to be nervous at work, you need to find something you like. It should bring pleasure, satisfaction and money. You will have to pay for a job you don’t like in terms of overwork, nervousness, and illness.

To understand how not to be nervous at work, advice from a psychologist will help, recommending drawing up a plan for each action leading to the main goal. When it seems that there is no end to the work, set additional tasks, intermediate ones. Praise yourself for completing a certain stage in the plan. You need to believe in yourself and not be afraid to take on difficult work.

Additional Information. If you start your day by doing the most unpleasant task, you will feel completely satisfied once it is completed. The remaining points will seem easy.

A cozy workplace, clear goals, friendly relations with colleagues are necessary conditions for creating a favorable atmosphere, far from stress.

Experiences at work

Experiences during pregnancy

Pregnancy makes all women nervous. They worry about any reason, causing harm to themselves and the health of the baby. It is necessary to avoid stressful situations and not create them yourself. Breathing techniques will help you not to panic. There are special exercises that can be performed by pregnant women, including yoga. The main thing is to establish a daily routine, eat right, provide the body with vitamins and useful elements, and sleep more than 8 hours a day. Then worries will remain aside.

Online courses

I also offer you effective courses that contain simple techniques for controlling your emotions in difficult situations and will help you learn to control tense situations.

Video course How to get rid of fear once and for all - these are effective lessons that highlight the causes of fear and techniques for defeating it. Cost – 990 rub. The course will help:

• find out what awaits you when you get rid of anxiety;
• get to know the mistakes that cause anxiety;
• recognize the difference between a natural reaction to danger and disturbing anxiety;
• Find out how to get rid of anxiety forever.

The author of the course is Denis Shvetsov, an expert on human psychology and emotional state.

“Anti-Fear” First Aid Kit – here you will find information about simple techniques for getting rid of fear, which can be applied at any time. Cost – 292 rubles.

The course helps you learn:

• how to cope with anxiety;
• how to get rid of phobias;
• methods of dealing with anxiety;
• proper breathing techniques for recovery.

The author of the course is Alexander Zhurakovsky, a specialist in working with complex emotional states.

Master class 15 ways to get rid of fears - here you are given effective methods of dealing with fears.

You will learn:

• effective techniques for dealing with anxiety;
• ways to restore peace and tranquility;
• methods of getting rid of the fear of the unknown;
• reasons for fears.

The author of the master class is Alexander Zhurakovsky.

Cost – 949 rubles. There are discounts.

The Brain Detoxification course from Vikium is 10 lessons for a complete “brain rewiring”.

The course will help:

• clear the mind;
• learn to concentrate on what is important;
• reduce tension levels;
• sleep and rest better;
• get rid of toxic thoughts.

The author of the course is Viktor Shiryaev, an expert in developmental psychology and integral philosophy.

Cost – 1,490 rubles.

The video course How to quickly cope with fear and anxiety provides simple and effective techniques for the complete restoration of the nervous system.

Cost – 800 rub.

You will learn how to:

• eliminate anxiety as soon as it appears;
• eliminate life traumas;
• think positively.

The author of the course is Sergey Davidenko, a specialist in getting rid of anxiety and fear.

Be confident in yourself

One of the main reasons for anxiety is uncertainty. Always strive to be confident in yourself, your strengths, your appearance, and that you make a positive impression on others. The following simple steps will help you make significant progress in this direction:

• go in for sports (a beautiful figure is the most important factor in self-confidence);
• become a really good specialist in your fields (work, hobbies, common interests with friends);
• reconsider your own views on the surrounding reality;
• meditate (a well-developed meditation skill will allow you to quickly stop worrying in a difficult situation).

These habits will not only increase your self-confidence, but will also help you achieve success in the most important areas of your life.

Specialist help

Often you need a push to change your life and get out of the rut. And this impetus can be a visit to a specialist. Problems of irritability at the physiological level are considered by neurologists and psychiatrists. Feel free to contact them with your questions. After all, timely prescribed “Novo-Passit” or “Glitsed” will significantly facilitate your perception of the problem situation.

If it comes to the soul and relationships, then it is better to consult a psychologist or psychotherapist. These specialists will help you identify the causes of your irritability, work through them and give recommendations on how to reduce nervousness due to your husband’s behavior, calm you down before the wedding, or teach you how not to worry when communicating with strangers.

Expert help

Sergey Litan

Psychologist, psychoanalyst, researcher

Ask a Question

Hello, my name is Sergey. I am an expert in the field of psychology and psychoanalysis. I work by passion and love my job. I specialize in depression and anxiety. Over 20 years of practice, I have helped hundreds of people get their results: get out of depression, regain joy in life, put their inner state in order, get rid of fears, phobias and panic attacks. Years of research have allowed me to find the most effective “tools” for solving almost any situation and life scenario.

Tell me about your problem and I will help you.

What harm does worry bring?

Unnecessary experiences prevent a person from controlling his own behavior and negatively affect his health. Let us note the most important negative consequences of anxiety:

1. Decreased intellectual abilities
   . The brain is the center of the nervous system, and it is where stress bears the brunt. Constant nervousness impairs memory and the ability to concentrate on tasks at hand.
2. Difficulty with self-control
   . A person who cannot restrain emotions creates a negative impression in professional activities and personal communication.
3. "Broken Focus"
   . Nervousness weakens concentration. As a result, we focus on the little things and lose sight of the really important things.
4. Chronic fatigue
   . Constant worry is more tiring than complex intellectual work. A person who constantly worries about little things loses the ability to work effectively.
5. Bad habits
   . Nervous people are constantly looking for ways to distract themselves from unnecessary thoughts, resorting to the help of tobacco and alcohol. Sometimes it comes to more dangerous means.
6. Real diseases
   . Constant stress can result in serious health problems. It has a particularly strong effect on all kinds of inflammatory processes in the body.

What you need to get rid of in life so as not to be nervous

There is a burden in our lives that we pull from day to day, from year to year. And we don’t understand what prevents us from living happily? This burden can also lead to excessive irritability. We lose peace and are constantly nervous for no reason. What kind of cargo is this?

1. Guilt. Worries about any reason drain our nervous system. Try to forgive yourself minor mistakes, learn to accept yourself with your strengths and weaknesses.
2. Fears. Constant anxiety about dismissal, betrayal, illnesses of children, the apocalypse, or a global crisis leads, at best, to nervousness, and at worst, to illness. Try to enjoy life here and now and not think in a negative way.
3. Ought. Remember: NO ONE OWES ANYTHING TO ANYONE. You cannot adjust all people to yourself and your rules. Allow your loved ones to make mistakes, then they won’t annoy you so much.

Lesson 4. How to avoid nervousness during an important meeting.

Pretend calm: even if neither your emotional mood nor breathing exercises helped you relieve tension, then at least try with all your might to demonstrate external calm and equanimity. And this is necessary not only to mislead your opponents about your current state. Expressing outer peace helps to achieve inner peace. This operates on the principle of feedback, not only how you feel determines your facial expressions, but also your facial expressions determine how you feel. This principle is easy to test: when you smile at someone, you feel better and more cheerful, even if you were in a bad mood before. I actively use this principle in my daily practice and this is not my invention, it is really a fact, it is even written about in Wikipedia in the article “emotions”. So the calmer you want to appear, the more relaxed you actually become.

Watch your facial expressions, gestures and intonation: the feedback principle obliges you to constantly look inside yourself and be aware of how you look from the outside. Do you seem too stressed? Are your eyes shifting? Are the movements smooth and measured or abrupt and impulsive? Does your face express cold impenetrability or can all your excitement be read on it? In accordance with the information about yourself received from your senses, you adjust all your body movements, voice, and facial expression. The fact that you have to take care of yourself in itself helps you get together and concentrate. And it’s not just that with the help of internal observation you control yourself. By observing yourself, you focus your thoughts on one point - on yourself, and do not let them get confused and lead you in the wrong direction. This is how concentration and calm are achieved.

Eliminate all markers of nervousness: What do you usually do when you're nervous? Are you fiddling with a ballpoint pen? Are you chewing on a pencil? Are you tying your left big toe and little toe into a knot? Now forget about it, keep your hands straight and don’t change their positions often. We don’t fidget in our chair, we don’t shift from foot to foot. We continue to look after ourselves.

Take your time: rush and bustle always sets a special nervous tone. Therefore, take your time even if you are late for a meeting. Since any rush very quickly disrupts composure and a calm mood. You begin to nervously rush from one to another, in the end you only provoke excitement. No matter how much you are rushed, do not rush, being late is not so scary, it is better to save your nerves. This applies not only to important meetings: try to get rid of haste in every aspect of your life: when you are getting ready for work, traveling in public transport, doing work. It's an illusion that when you rush, you achieve results faster. Yes, the speed increases, but only slightly, but you lose a lot in composure and concentration.

That's all. All these principles complement each other and can be summarized in the call to “look after yourself.” The rest is specific and depends on the nature of the meeting itself. I would only advise you to think about each of your phrases, take your time with your answer, carefully weigh and analyze everything. There is no need to try to make an impression in all available ways, you will make one if you do everything right and don’t worry, work on the quality of your performance. There is no need to mumble and get lost if you are caught by surprise: calmly swallow, forget and move on.

FAQ

– How to stop being nervous during pregnancy?

– Most often, nervousness during pregnancy and after childbirth in young mothers is associated with a hormone imbalance or excess progesterone (tearfulness). In this case, it is better to consult a gynecologist who will prescribe medications that reduce irritability.

– How to remain calm in a relationship?

– First, figure out what exactly irritates you. These are the habits of the person with whom you want to maintain a relationship, his appearance or behavior. When you decide on this question, you can build a dialogue approximately on the topic “Don’t throw your socks here, they spoil the look of the room and emit an unpleasant smell.” Remember that constructive dialogue helps to establish and improve relationships.

– How not to be nervous at school?

– Teenagers often find it difficult to study due to “excessive nerves.” This is due not only to the restructuring of the body, but also to objective reasons. To remove these reasons, there are several recommendations:

• open up to adults you trust, don’t keep your experiences to yourself;
• learn to concentrate on what is important without being scattered on many things;
• allow yourself to make mistakes - every person has the right to make mistakes, no one is ideal;
• don’t chase grades – knowledge is more important;
• tune in to the positive - in the end, even if you are eaten, you have 2 options;
• solve problems as they arise, stop beating yourself up;
• be sure to rest!

– How to learn not to be nervous in stressful situations?

– Stress can throw us out of our usual rut, but it’s up to us how we react to it. It is important to learn to think positively, to look for at least a drop of good even in the worst situation. Then it will be easier to cope with any stress.

– How not to be nervous in online games?

– Purely my personal opinion – don’t play! And if on topic, then prepare yourself that this is just a game. Even if it’s important, even if it’s rated, even if you’re handsome and without well-deserved points you stop respecting yourself - learn to live a real life, learn to respect yourself for who you are, and not for your merits in games.

Lesson 5. Calm down after the meeting.

Whatever the outcome of the event. You're on edge and still feeling stressed. It's better to take it off and think about something else. All the same principles apply here that helped you pull yourself together before the meeting itself. Try not to think too much about the past event: I mean all sorts of fruitless thoughts, what if I had performed this way and not that way, oh, how stupid I must have looked, oh I’m a fool, what if...! Just throw all thoughts out of your head, get rid of the subjunctive mood (if), everything has already passed, put your breathing in order and relax your body. That's all for this lesson.

How to do breathing exercises

Nervous tension is increasingly becoming chronic and becoming a lifelong companion. We worry about everything: ourselves, family, loved ones, the future, money, work and many other things. Anxious thoughts are spinning in our heads. To find peace of mind and peace of mind, it is recommended to systematically perform breathing exercises.

It is enough to spend 10-15 minutes to complete the exercise, but after that the stress will be relieved as if by hand. You can exercise anytime and anywhere. Try to calm down and focus on breathing. The rule of counting to 10 works here. Take a break from your immediate problems for a moment and observe your breathing.

“Kapalbhati” is an effective breathing exercise that came to us from yoga. Focus on exhaling. First, we take a deep and quick breath, then very slowly, several counts, and exhale. At the same time, keep your back straight, shoulders straightened. Breathing exercises are performed first with a small number of repetitions, gradually increasing their number. If you feel a tingling sensation in your chest, increased heart rate, or dizziness, stop.

In films, we often see how nerves are calmed by breathing into a bag. The method works. This is because when you inhale the same air repeatedly, the level of carbon dioxide in your blood rises. Thanks to this, the muscles relax and a sedative effect is observed.

Do not accumulate negative emotions and feelings in yourself, let them come out by performing breathing exercises.

Preventative treatment

Even if you have learned to suppress attacks of nervousness, this is not enough. It will be better if you become less nervous in general. To do this, you must regularly carry out preventive measures.

Follow a sleep schedule

A constant lack of sleep has a bad effect on health and, in particular, on the nervous system. Make sure you get at least 8 hours of sleep every day. It is advisable to go to bed at the same time. Basic principle: regularity and duration. More than 8 hours of sleep is not recommended, either.

Keeping a sleep schedule works wonders. It makes you more energetic, alert and increases your resistance to stress.

Eat healthy

Eat a balanced and varied diet. Your body needs to receive the full spectrum of vitamins. Eat less fried and fast food. Eat more foods that contain essential nutrients for your nervous system (magnesium, vitamin B, zinc, antioxidants): whole grains, nuts, various fruits and vegetables.

Drink more water. Dehydration can trigger stress.

Do fitness

Move more and spend time outdoors as much as possible. Try to take a break from the computer if you have the opportunity. Play sports. Sport strengthens the body, relieves tension and stress.

Meditate

First, a meditation session helps you relax. Secondly, regular practice increases resistance to stress. This is why equanimity has become the hallmark of the experienced yogi or seasoned meditator.

Unlike yoga, you don’t need an experienced instructor or a special place to start meditating. You can meditate anywhere. Learning the basics of meditation is easy, and even an inexperienced person can do it.

• 6 Amazing Benefits of Meditation

Get rid of bad habits

Although smoking and alcohol may calm you down for a short period of time, the substances found in cigarettes, alcohol and other drugs negatively affect the nervous system.

The more and more often you use alcohol and other drugs, the more stress your body is exposed to in everyday life. Don't overuse coffee! Caffeine causes the body to release stress hormones.

Try not to create stressful situations yourself

For example, if you are preparing to take an exam, there is no need to worry and be nervous if you have prepared well and know the subject. You are calm because there is no situation that could contribute to stress. Conversely, if you are poorly prepared for the exam, you begin to worry and think that you will certainly come across the topic that you know the worst.

Prepare for important meetings and negotiations so that you have no reason to blush. Think about the future and always have a plan of action ready. Follow the plan.

How to be calm on the eve of an important event

So, you are waiting for an important event, and you know that it can test your knowledge, status, responsibility, intelligence or will. It is a test, after passing which you will be rewarded; If you don't pass it, you will lose. Similar thoughts may arise before an exam, interview, meeting, important meeting, date, etc.

The first thing we can advise here is to realize and feel the fact that even if an upcoming important event leads to an outcome that does not suit you, you can either try to change the outcome (if it is in your power) or stop worrying about it. for him (if you cannot influence him). In any case, this event with a 99% probability will not mean the end of your entire life for you.

One of the rules of any calm and balanced person is not to dramatize anything, not to turn a fly into an elephant, to analyze your actions and learn from mistakes. The importance of upcoming events makes us nervous and “twitching,” but precisely from this importance comes the need for calm and control of emotions. You must understand that nervousness is an obstacle to achieving success and the desired result.

For this reason, you need to strive to be collected and focused, learn to relieve jitters and calm your thoughts. To do this, you need, firstly, to get rid of any thoughts about failure and failure from your head, secondly, try not to think about the outcome of the event at all, and thirdly, relax and calm your thoughts. And for this you can use a fairly simple breathing exercise:

• inhale for 4 counts (instead of counting, you can focus on your pulse);
• hold your breath for 2 counts;
• exhale slowly for 8 counts;
• hold your breath for 2 counts;
• repeat the first 4 steps (8-10 repetitions will be enough to start with, but you can do more).

But here it is important to make a few comments.

Breathe with your diaphragm, i.e. belly. When we are nervous, we often breathe from the chest, but only breathing from the diaphragm helps calm our heartbeat. It suppresses the physiological signs of anxiety and nervousness and is very calming.

When doing breathing exercises, concentrate on your breathing. Try not to think about anything at all. By doing this, within 2-3 minutes you will feel calm and relaxed. The duration of the exercise should be 5-7 minutes.

Regular breathing practice will not only have a momentary effect (which is required when you need to calm down at a particular moment), but will also contribute to the overall harmonization of your mental state in the long term. As a result, you will be less nervous, even without resorting to any exercise.

If it happens that you have already found yourself in some difficult (stressful) situation without having time to prepare, the breathing technique we have given can also help. But along with it, it is useful to use several other techniques and recommendations.

A few additional tips

Each person must choose the activities that will help him relax and stop being nervous.

You might find these tips useful:

1. Look at the clouds floating in the sky.
2. Wash your face with cold water.
3. In rainy weather, look at the rain, listen to the uniform patter of drops.
4. Ask a loved one to read a book out loud to you until you fall asleep.
5. Take paints or pencils and draw whatever comes to your mind. Don't worry about the details and the end result.

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Coaching classes are conducted by a certified specialist, esotericist, numerologist, author of trainings on energy information literacy, ethics and personal growth, health improvement and rejuvenation Tatyana Panyushkina. The program consists of 5-9 modules, the number of which depends on the chosen course option: “Basic”, “Foundation”, “Maximum”.

Proven practices will forever help you forget about fears and attract good luck into your life.

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What stress can lead to

To begin with, it would not be superfluous to say a few words about what stress and nervous strain can lead to.

A constantly anxious and nervous person is systematically in a zone of psychological (and even physical) discomfort. Unpleasant sensations can occur before an exam, an important meeting, an important event, meeting someone, and in other cases; in case of failure, refusals, in ridiculous situations and situations where you can seem funny in the eyes of others. Sometimes nervousness can appear even for no apparent reason, but in any case it can (and should) be explained by the psychological aspects of the human personality.

Nervousness, especially if it has developed into a chronic form, can have the most negative impact on a person’s life. Here is just a small list of the consequences of this destructive mental state:

• inability to control one's own life;
• inability to control your emotions and mental manifestations;
• concentration of all forces on the fight against negative emotions;
• loss of life guidelines;
• apathy, lack of life purpose and reluctance to develop;
• decreased brain performance;
• chronic fatigue (its consequence can be serious health problems);
• development of bad habits (alcohol, smoking, drugs and various medications become a means of “helping” a person relax and relieve tension).

This is just a small list of possible results that stress and nervousness can lead to. How to stop being nervous and prevent all this from happening? It’s worth starting with at least a little elaboration of your fears.

The nature of nervousness. Necessary defense mechanism or hindrance?

Nervousness, or a state of increased nervous tension, manifests itself in physiological and mental reactions.

Stress has become a constant companion for residents of big cities.

The physiological response to stress is the release of adrenaline, which leads to increased blood pressure, increased heart rate and respiration, which in turn helps the body mobilize resources for quick and active action.

It is no coincidence that nature has endowed humans with such a response mechanism, because the main cause of stress for our ancestors were situations that really threatened life.

The active work of all vital systems helped ancient people avoid death.

Modern man is much less likely to be exposed to mortal danger. The stress reaction is no longer a necessary protective mechanism, but only interferes with the person.

The emotional and mental component of stress comes to the fore.

A person in a state of increased nervous excitability:

• loses concentration and is unable to concentrate;
• has poor control over his behavior;
• gets tired faster;
• susceptible to diseases of the cardiovascular system;
• vulnerable to the development of addictions: alcohol, nicotine, drugs, food;
• demonstrates a general decrease in performance.

How to quickly calm down at home

Experiences can haunt us even when we are at home. If this happens to you, let's look at how to quickly calm down at home. The following activities will help you relieve stress and relax:

• Water treatments to control emotions. A warm bath or shower has a beneficial effect on the nervous system. Skin receptors come into contact with water and calm down. You can enhance the effect with sea salt, essential oils of pine, lavender, mint.
• Aromatherapy. Incense sticks, sprays, and lamps affect the sense of smell, providing a calming effect.
• Physical exercise. Not only sports, but also regular cleaning of the house will help you switch.
• You can learn to control your emotions by listening to the sounds of nature, melodic music, and watching calm films.