From this article you will learn:
- How to attract the attention of a man you like
- How to start a relationship
- What behavior scares men away?
- What not to do in a relationship
- How to keep a man for a long time
The key to harmony in relationships
Every man wants to be in charge in everything: in work, in friendship, in family. It is important for a results-oriented careerist to achieve success and occupy a high position in the company where he works. As an adventurer and the life of the party, it is important to maintain leadership among your friends. And an exemplary family man simply needs to be the head and support of the family. Just like women: not everyone is ready to humbly submit to the will of their opponent.
Modern society loves and is accustomed to seeing purposeful, strong-willed, strong-willed ladies. It is precisely on the basis of this desire for primacy, the desire to be better and stronger than others, attempts to surpass not only their rival, but also their neighbor, that people come to a complete lack of harmony in the relationship between a man and a woman.
When everyone pulls the blanket over themselves, when no one in a couple is able to give up their principles. Then it is impossible to talk about established contact and a favorable microclimate in relations between the two. Only mutual efforts to achieve a common denominator can lead to coherence and positive dynamics in the chemistry of young people with each other. The key to a harmonious relationship between a man and a woman is their understanding of the weight and significance of not only their own self, but also the role of their partner in their life.
TOP 5 books on relationship psychology
And in order to better understand men, it is necessary to begin to understand male psychology, and the psychology of relationships. To do this, we recommend reading the following books:
- Robert Johnson "We" The Deepest Aspects of Romantic Love"
- John Gray "Men are from Mars, women are from Venus"
- Michael Matteo "A Book about Tasty and Healthy Relationships"
- Tina Tessina, Riley Smith “How to Live as a Couple and Stay Free”
- Andrey Zberovsky “13 ways to overcome the crisis of love relationships”
Characteristics of harmonious relationships
We can talk a lot about individual units of society and their interpersonal connections. After all, every couple has its own moments and nuances: someone welcomes freedom in relationships, the opportunity to have sexual relations with other partners on the side, but does not at all accept lies and insincerity in their couple. For some, even a partner’s flirting with someone else is a fierce taboo, but respect and respect for each other come first. For some, the priority aspect of the financial situation in the family is the common budget, while others prefer to have a separate treasury and spend their funds at their own discretion. In short, each couple has its own characteristics in communicating and building a communication process with each other. But there is a certain general average set of factors that are connecting links in a chain called “harmony of happy relationships.” What can be included in the list of these same factors?
- Mutual understanding is the primary factor of mutual agreement and harmonious coexistence.
- Love is the beginning of the sensual and emotional microclimate in the family.
- Trust is the basis of a strong partnership.
- Loyalty is a guarantee of a worthy life together.
- Respect is a strong argument in the relationship of a strong couple.
- Caring is the ability to appreciate each other and cherish our relationships.
- Compromise is a lever for managing discussions.
- Conflict-free – as the ability to give in to each other and not provoke scandalous situations.
Here it is - a short list of those aspects that characterize harmony in the relationship between a man and a woman, and are also the foundation of a healthy and strong family. This is the set of priority areas that every couple needs to work on to achieve happiness in their life together.
Identify the main criteria4
If you are still a single person, but are thinking about building a harmonious relationship, clearly define your search criteria. You must highlight for yourself certain aspects and character traits that your chosen one should have. You should be comfortable with him.
Remember that there are no perfect people, just make your loved one ideal for you. Once you realize that your partner has the qualities you were looking for, you can come to terms with other shortcomings. No matter how good you both are, there will still be something that will irritate you about each other. Don’t try to change a person, as this is the key mistake of all relationships, which will end sooner or later anyway.
It is important to accept a person as he is. And if something doesn’t suit you, either leave or start making changes with yourself. As soon as you change your attitude towards the situation, you will see that the person in your eyes will begin to change.
Love
The first thing that motivates people who want to reunite their lives into a single whole is, of course, love. An important role in mutual attraction and further spending time together is played by the sensual aspect of the relationship, mental and sexual attraction. It is no coincidence that sexual intercourse is not separately identified as the most important factor in a harmonious relationship between a man and a woman. Undoubtedly, this is a fairly significant moment in the development of any couple, and much depends on how the intimate life of the two partners works. If passion fades, if erogenous perception and attraction fade away, the relationship begins to lose that fire and that zest that connects them at the physiological level. Many notes and articles by qualified sexologists have been written about how to return sexual harmony to a relationship.
A joint visit to a psychologist, the use of new erotic lingerie by a woman, or the purchase of sexual paraphernalia in the appropriate store for the thrill of sensations - all these methods are effective, and they are not news to anyone. But can sex alone become the limiting factor in a falling apart relationship? Not at all. Only a union that is based on emotional and sensual attraction, a passionate perception of each other by a couple, can lead to truly harmonious contact between people. And the basis is love, not sex.
Rule 7. I have a surprise for you!
Remember how you used to want to do nice little things for each other? You strived to surprise, delight and lift the spirits of your loved one! What's stopping you from doing this now? Do not have the time? Inspiration? Are you tired? So make your relationship a source of energy, this is the most rewarding investment of energy and time.
Bring adventure and novelty into your shared life and avoid boredom - according to research published in Psychological Science, boredom increases the emotional distance between people and creates a feeling of dissatisfaction in relationships.
Sometimes, to revive old romance, it is enough to look at old photos, bringing up old memories, or go on a date to a special place for you.
Understanding
But even strong affection and a feeling of love are not capable of, in their unity, ensuring the most calm and balanced climate in the relationship of two opposites. You can love ardently and selflessly, passionately and selflessly, but it is difficult to achieve constancy and coherence if there is no mutual understanding.
Harmonious relationships between a man and a woman take place only when each of them is able to participate in each other’s lives, understand and accept the actions and actions of the partner, and reach consensus. Very often, what men look for in a woman is not good looks or sexual attractiveness. They consider these feminine qualities only as a reason for a relationship for one or several nights.
In search of a lifelong friend, the powers that be are often guided by a sense of self-preservation, the need for a feeling of comfort and the presence of a partner nearby who could listen, support, and help with advice in a given situation. Just as a woman strives to find a man for her husband who would be able to understand her nature and reveal the full range of components of her femininity. This is mutual understanding. Behind it lies the answer to the question of how to achieve harmony in relationships.
How to create an ideal relationship? Let's look at the 8 rules of happiness
There is no ideal relationship - and this is good, because any problem provokes movement and growth. Everything you know now is a solved problem from your past, so be grateful for the difficulties and tasks that appear along the way. The main thing is that there is harmony in the relationship, then all barriers will be overcome simply and pleasantly.
If your relationship is emotionally unstable, if you constantly feel that something is going wrong, this is not yet a reason for panic, but already a reason for analysis. Relationship problems concern two people.
If it seems to you that you are doing everything right and the problem is with your partner, this is an illusion. To figure out how to avoid imbalance and build happy, harmonious relationships, it’s worth considering what puzzles they consist of.
Confidence
Do people often do reckless things? All around. Especially when it comes to love relationships. Couples regularly quarrel, make scandals, have conflicts, and sometimes these conflicts are completely groundless. And it all comes down to the fact that there is no trust between people in these kinds of situations. What kind of harmony can we talk about between a man and a woman if they persistently do not trust each other, control each other, suspect adultery, and are jealous? If a person lives with the subconscious thought that deception awaits him at every step, it will be difficult for him to achieve calmness and balance in his relationship with his other half.
The ability to trust is to some extent a gift. Not everyone is able to feel the sincerity of their partner, having once been previously betrayed by someone. But trust can and should be learned, because without it it is quite difficult to build any kind of relationship at all, be it love, friendship or even a career.
How to build a strong relationship with a man
Any woman wants a man next to her with whom she would feel protected, attractive and at the same time weak as a woman.
And yet, before meeting their one and only, many have to go through disappointments in order to understand what she really wants. And that's not a bad thing. From her personal experience, she will be able to understand the individual characteristics of her character and decide how to build a future relationship with a man.
What does a woman want from a man? It depends on age, social status, temperament, social circle.
Here are the main reasons why a woman wants a relationship with a man:
- Marry. This is a natural desire of any woman of reproductive age. Every woman wants to start a family, give birth to a child, take care of her husband;
- Don't be lonely, love and be loved;
- Meet a patron who would solve her financial problems;
- Find a good caring lover;
- Find a father for your children.
Every woman should remember one simple thing: a good relationship with a man will only work out when a woman loves and respects herself.
In this case, she will not enter into a relationship with a married man, gigolo or psychopath. Only when she has a good relationship with her partner can she feel happy.
Loyalty
How many people - so many opinions. How many couples there are, so many types of relationships with all their nuances and specific moments. There are irrational individuals who prefer acute sensations and passionate impulses. They like to diversify their sex life with various extraordinary elements of behavior in bed, as well as frequent changes of partners, even if they have a permanent one, or swinging. But in any case, such people are a minority. Most of the representatives of an adequate society lead an average lifestyle, while they are characterized by standard human values, among which loyalty plays one of the most important roles.
Many women cannot imagine harmony in their relationship with their husband given the constant reasons for jealousy that the husband gives with his behavior. Just like men: they often have an extremely negative attitude towards their ladies’ communication with the opposite sex. And again, it is important to reach a consensus here: it is one thing when there is a reason, and completely different when jealousy is far-fetched. If you regularly break your vow of fidelity to your partner, even by flirting lightly with someone on the side, if you constantly confuse your other half with this, and sometimes even become furious, then how can you find harmony in your relationship? Only in a couple, the points of contact in which are reflected in mutual respect and mutual fidelity, can one talk about any kind of trust and harmonious coexistence.
Why are relationships needed?
The desire to find your soul mate is primarily driven by the desire to procreate. I want to start a family, give birth and raise children.
Besides this, there are other reasons:
- It’s easier to live together and experience life’s difficulties;
- It’s more joyful to experience pleasant moments together;
- In difficult times you can rely on someone;
- There is someone to care about and someone to turn to for advice;
- To have someone to meet old age with.
The reasons are different for everyone, but, in any case, it is much more difficult to live alone than with a loved one.
Respect
Speaking about mutual respect between a man and a woman, it should be noted that this is an equally weighty argument that affects the development of relationships between a couple. Surprisingly, even love, which faded over time and grew into some semblance of affection, cannot keep a fading relationship afloat as much as mutual respect between people.
When a person sacrifices himself, his principles, and acts at the will of his partner, if the situation really requires it, then this certainly deserves praise. When he goes against his beliefs, realizing how important it is for his loved one, this also says a lot.
An invisible thread of respect acts as a powerful connecting link between a young man and his chosen one, since those relationships that are built on the respect of one of them for the other can carry such a union through the years. And it doesn’t matter at what stage their slightly cooled feelings are or how regular their sex life is. What is important is their own respect for each other's principles. Such relationships can be called truly strong and strong.
Ask, accept, thank
Not all women know how to ask men for anything. They make hints that men do not understand, and then get offended by them for it. We are not accustomed to asking, we were taught that we can do everything ourselves and should not be weak. How nice it is to be weak, to feel your dependence!
And accept what he gives with faith and love. And be sure to thank him sincerely and looking into his eyes, so that he feels that he has accomplished a feat. Believe me, a man will be drawn to such a woman like a flower to the sun.
Under no circumstances should you try to change your other half.
How often are women guilty of this? It seems to them that they know and understand better what a man wants. They take him on vacation wherever they want, they forbid them to communicate with friends, imposing their useful acquaintances on them. And all this is done for the benefit of the family. But if a person is driven into a dead end, he will explode. A woman should be soft, wise, and then there will be peace and tranquility in the family.
Care
It is important not to forget about the attention that should be present in any interpersonal communications in a couple. After all, how to maintain harmony in relationships in which people are indifferent to each other? In which the wife does not care about her husband’s appearance and sends him to work in dirty, unironed clothes, and without food? In which a young man does not cover his frozen lady with a warm blanket on a cold winter evening and does not rush to the pharmacy for medicine when he sees that she has a cold? The manifestation of sincere love, and with it - comprehensive care and immeasurable tenderness - makes relationships incredibly strong and warm. This is the fundamental basis that identifies the warmth and comfort of a family hearth. In a home where attention reigns and caring for each other is encouraged, the apocalypse in the form of divorce is unlikely to ever occur. And all because a reverent attitude towards each other and courteous caring help young people learn the truth about how to create harmony in relationships.
Listen and hear each other
Have you ever communicated with people who seem to listen to you, but are thinking about something of their own? They are not interested in your opinion, your experiences. Next time you are unlikely to want to communicate with them. This happens in families too. Partners do not know how to listen and hear what the other is telling them. Hence the misunderstandings, resentments, and claims. But everything can be learned.
Try to imbue yourself with the experiences of a person close to you, get into his skin, feel his pain and joy. Maybe then you can understand him better. You need to learn this. It is important for a woman that a man simply listens to her, hugs her and comforts her.
Sometimes a man needs to be allowed to be alone and under no circumstances bother him with conversations when he has just come from work or is busy with something. Give him a rest, switch from work to home, feed him and only then you can question him.
Compromise coexistence
People should take a closer look at the animal world: these silent creatures never create scandalous scenes or long fights with each other, being in a biological reproductive couple. With the exception, of course, of praying mantises, where the female, after the act of procreation, literally eliminates her partner. In fact, a compromise is that island of land in the endless ocean of everyday troubles, worries and civil strife, which brings people out of a scandalous situation as a lifeline.
If a discussion is brewing between young people in a couple, a compromise can miraculously stop the brewing showdown due to existing disagreements. It will be possible to comprehend the harmony of human relations only if the husband and wife in their active disputes come to a common denominator, without leading to discord or a serious scandal. This skill - to find consensus - can prevent any impending storm.
Rule 1. Fall and catch!
Fall blindfolded - trust! Even if you have been betrayed a thousand times, trust again. This is the only way to be happy, even if sometimes you are sure that it brings only unhappiness.
Living with an open heart takes courage, and most people close themselves down after a few disappointments. Just tell yourself “it happens,” understand that people are different and you’ve just been unlucky so far, but if you can stay open, in the end you will understand why you had to endure all this.
And if you close yourself, you are protecting yourself from love - fire does not burn without access to oxygen.
Praise the man, say more pleasant words
Although it is generally accepted that only women love with their ears, it is very important for men to hear kind words addressed to them . Don't skimp on compliments and gratitude. A simple “thank you” doesn’t cost you anything, and a man will want to please you again and again if he receives a return in the form of your delight and praise.
Talk more often about your feelings for him, tell him why you value him, what you like about him. This increases his self-esteem (and self-esteem is everything in a man) and lets him know that your feelings for him are unchanged.
Praise in public is most effective ; a man will be especially grateful to you for public praises.
