What to do if you give up? There are times when you want to give up everything. There is no more strength to endure or strive for the goal.
When there is not only no light at the end of the tunnel, but nothing at all. When it’s dark all around, where you can’t even see your own hands. It seems that such a life will never end, that nothing will change and goals will remain goals.
There is no more strength to try, to try. Apathy, it seems that you will never succeed.
To begin with, I will say a few words about running, where I realized something very important for myself (what is the connection between running and meditation?). Something that is very useful in everyday life. By the way, I don’t run marathons, these are short distances, but even this mileage is enough to notice certain, so to speak, stages or stages. They relate to both physical fatigue and psychological work with oneself while running.
Running in general, it seems to me, is very similar to our path in life. Only on a different scale, more simplified.
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What are apathy and depression
Before you begin to actively fight the “enemy,” you need to learn more about him. So, apathy and depression are essentially very similar, but at the same time different things. In the first case, there is absolutely no desire to do anything. But all this is not related to external factors. Apathy can manifest itself on cold autumn evenings, when you just want to hide under a warm blanket, drink tea and dream.
Depression is a deeper condition caused by stress or other emotional distress. Although there are cases when the etiology cannot be determined. If apathy is accompanied only by emotional manifestations (such as sadness and melancholy), then depression can cause loss of sleep, weight loss and even suicidal thoughts. Each of these conditions requires a special approach.
"The Darkest Hour Before the Dawn"
This old saying (presumably coming to us from the English language) is actively used in various films and books. And for good reason. Think about its meaning. Often despair overtakes us a moment before solving a problem. Remember at least a couple of cases from your life when you were no longer able to deal with difficulties on your own, and suddenly someone came to the rescue. This is easily explained: a person fights and solves problems on his own until the last moment, but to resolve the situation it was enough to ask for help. And once you give in and ask for help, the problem is solved. Usually the boiling point is not reached immediately, but almost at the end of the journey. Many people have given up, not even suspecting that they are just one step away from success - because they cannot foresee the future. But if you stop and stop walking, you will remain in the same place further.
After the black stripe comes the white stripe. This means that, being at the peak of the crisis, you can be sure that you will soon come out of it.
Causes of apathy and depression
A person's mood is influenced by a variety of factors. But still, most often it is the lack of purpose and motivation that leads to apathy and depression. A person doesn’t want anything, he forgets about those things that previously gave him strength and energy. Therefore, if you are wondering what to do if you give up, then it’s urgently time for you to reconsider your priorities and plans.
In addition, apathy and depression can occur as a result of severe physical and moral exhaustion. Every person needs rest and peace. Only in this case will he have enough strength and energy for new achievements.
When you give up and have no more strength, laziness appears. Yes, on the one hand it is completely harmless. Well, isn't it nice to be lazy at least once in your life? On the other hand, this is a very insidious “thing”. Sometimes it’s simply amazing how laziness skillfully guides a person. She finds the most incredible excuses just to interfere with her plans. In the end, having completely relaxed, it is already difficult to force yourself to do anything.
The desire to get everything at once can also lead to depression and apathy. A person takes the slightest failure with hostility and simply refuses to act further.
Let's rest properly
Yes, it turns out that not all types of relaxation are equally beneficial. A person decides to relax, turns on the news, opens social networks. A whole mountain of absolutely unnecessary information falls on him. Can you call this a vacation? Yes, physically, most likely, the body is resting (sitting or lying). But morally, no. You need to learn to allocate at least 30 minutes a day for yourself. Try not to think about anything. You can walk around the city, take a bath. The main thing is to be alone with yourself and your thoughts.
The people around you can often also cause apathy. Endless stories about diseases and how bad everything, like a virus, infects a person. You should either avoid such conversations or learn to distance yourself from them.
How to fight laziness
If you're wondering what to do when you give up, then most likely you've just been idle lately. Alas, you do not control your feelings, but they control you. But you can overcome laziness, and you will definitely succeed. First, turn on some good music and get out of bed. You must take a piece of paper with a pen and write down your plans. Think about what is absolutely necessary in your life at the moment. What would you like to achieve? Close your eyes and imagine that you already have this thing. Isn't this wonderful?
If you are wondering how to get rid of laziness once and for all, then you need to “leave” your comfort zone. Let new and interesting events into your life. You can buy an expensive gym membership. Then laziness will collide with greed, and the latter will most likely win. Yes, when a person promises himself that he will run in the morning, there are a lot of excuses not to do this. Another thing is to simply throw money away. Are you worried that this will happen? But you still try and make sure that all these were excuses that your laziness “invented” for you.
Another most effective remedy to help fight laziness is “doing nothing.” Just sit in a chair, turn off the TV, computer, put away your phone. How long can you sit like this? Even the laziest person will figure out what to do and won’t last that long.
Well, the most important advice on how to get rid of laziness once and for all is motivation and purpose. Make a wish list. It must consist of 100 points. Not less! Now, discard the first 50 and look at the last. According to psychologists, they are the ones who reflect your true desires. But the first ones are everything that society imposes on you.
All at once
It also happens that goals are outlined, but the question of what to do if you give up still remains open. Sometimes a person sets a goal that is too broad and unattainable. After making several attempts, he gives up.
And this is not surprising. After all, the idea that you can’t do anything is firmly rooted in your consciousness. But in reality, you simply do not see your success. Of course, in this case, an attack of apathy is inevitable. If you don’t plan to give up your “great” goal, then break it down into smaller and more realistic ones. The more such goals there are, the better.
Learn the lessons
If our ancestors had not been able to draw conclusions, they would have made the same mistakes every time. Progress would not have happened, humanity would have stagnate in one place. The accumulated knowledge helps you move on. If you didn't know the consequences of making bad decisions, you would still make them, a day earlier or a day later. So just sit and think about what lessons you learned from the situation and what you can do now.
Remember famous people who once found themselves broke, and then got up and moved on, and achieved success again. I think there will definitely be a dozen examples. For example, Thomas Edison had over 10,000 failed attempts to invent a commercially viable light bulb. They didn’t want to publish a book about Harry Potter, but JK Rowling persisted.
Making a plan
For example, you decide to lose 20 kg of excess weight. It seems like you eat right and go to the gym, but nothing changes. After a week, you give up this useless activity. In fact, achieving this goal is quite possible. There's just not enough motivation. This is because losing weight takes time.
Break your goal down into “subgoals.” For example, this week you only need to lose 1 kg. Do not step on the scale for 6 days, but strictly adhere to your diet and exercise. After a week, the mark may drop by even 1.5 kg. It will bring you joy. Now imagine that there are only 9 more weeks of this and you are already halfway through your success. Is not that great?
Don't limit yourself to one goal. Let there be a lot of them - and they will not be too heavy. And at the end of the week or month, feel free to check the box next to the completed item.
Failures and defeats
They are the ones who unsettle a person. “Think about the good,” psychologists advise. But if only everything were so simple! In fact, you need to build your own “theory of happiness.” Think about the fact that defeats are experiences. Yes, it is negative, but that only makes it more valuable. Not everything and not always works out the first time. Sometimes, in order to succeed, people have to endure a lot of failures. If all this doesn't motivate you, read the success stories of great people. You can't even imagine what they had to go through. But was it worth it?
A prayer of thanksgiving is the best way out of an impasse
Go to church, confess, let go of grudges. By the way, grievances stuck in the soul hurt your health, especially your heart and liver. Cancer also causes resentment against family and friends.
Thank the Almighty for every moment you live. A prayer of gratitude, even in your own words, will change your whole life. You will see, and indeed, there is so much beauty around: the sky, running clouds, flowers, a river, people.
Yes, everything is fine! You just need to rejoice that God gives you the opportunity to see all this and live in this paradise.
Stop
Were you expecting a call to action? No, if you give up from powerlessness, you need to stop and think everything over. Fighting negative emotions will only make the situation worse. Of course, you can force yourself and rush into battle. But for what? Success comes to a person only when he is really determined to achieve it.
If you are still wondering how to deal with depression and apathy, then you need to stop tormenting yourself with remorse. A person finds himself in a vicious circle. He is trying to get out of depression and tells himself that he cannot be inactive. But such an attitude and a “commanding tone” towards oneself makes one even more despondent. Exhale and let go of all your worries.
Where to get strength when you give up? They need to be drawn only from positive emotions. What do you love to do most? You can buy yourself a beautiful thing or go on a trip. Any positive emotions will be beneficial.
Don't forget that you are surrounded by loved ones who care about you. If you share your problems with them, they will definitely be able to cheer you up and instill in you confidence in yourself and your strength. Do only what your heart really wants. If you want to be alone, turn off your phone and just enjoy the silence. And if you need support, talk to your friends. Proper rest and a good mood are the main helpers in the fight against depression and apathy.
Give yourself time to grieve
Allow yourself to process stress properly so that suppressed grief does not later result in depression. Give yourself a strictly limited time during which you have the right to: cry, eat cakes, watch sad films, go nowhere, replay your actions in your head and analyze your mistakes. Let this be your weekend, when you can, under a plausible excuse, not meet anyone you know and immerse yourself in your experiences. Having had your fill of grief, at some point you will realize that you are already sick of melodrama, you are tired of lying on the sofa, and you yourself will begin to do something step by step.
Let these steps be small, for example, cleaning up the house. But your energy will be directed towards something useful, and the result will be noticeable immediately, which will give you a feeling of satisfaction. This way you realize that at least you have control over something in your life.
