How to find yourself and your purpose in life: 5 simple steps

13 400452 October 19, 2021 at 08:26 Author of the publication: Yana Parshina, sales manager

Do you want to know how to find yourself in life? How to realize yourself? The answer is simple: you need to get to know yourself. You don't know yourself at all!

Ask someone, the first person you meet, to tell him about himself. The most you will hear are facts from the biography.

What can you tell us about yourself? Who are you? How are you different from others? What do you want? What do you know about how to find your place in life?

We don't know anything about ourselves. Nothing! We live our lives “by touch.” Some were lucky to find their way and take exactly their place in human society, working with pleasure, receiving excellent results and recognition from society. And some people continue to search for themselves even at 50 years old. True, the older you are, the sadder and more hopeless your search looks.

Fortunately, scientific progress does not stand still. New discoveries in psychology eliminate the need to search for yourself through scientific research, try yourself in different specialties, changing jobs one after another. After all, you can spend your whole life searching for yourself and your path!

You can find yourself in incredibly short lines by getting to know your real self, realizing what your unconscious is hiding. So, the path to self-realization - where to start?

In this article you will learn:

  • How to believe in yourself and your capabilities.
  • How to find your calling, clearly understand what it means to find yourself, your abilities and talents, the implementation of which will bring real satisfaction.;
  • How to recognize false targets and abandon them.
  • How to determine your place in society.
  • Why exactly are you trying to find your place in life, while others are not? Why can't you live like everyone else and be content with little?

How to find your way

It’s rare that someone manages to recognize themselves and their path in their early years, and then follow it. There are cases when a person betrays his ideals due to important circumstances: he changes his place of work because of the need to earn more, changes his place of residence, and so on. What does it mean to find yourself - to deal with the reasons that prevent you from hearing your inner voice and starting to act in your own interests.

The main reasons that prevent you from searching for yourself in life:

  1. Lack of self-confidence. When a person doubts that he has enough abilities to achieve what he wants, he quickly gives up and becomes lack of initiative. Gets an unwanted job and communicates with the wrong circle of people, although greater potential lurks within, which requires more confidence to reveal.
  2. Extol the value of money. There are times when people build a great career, but the work they do does not bring satisfaction. A profession that brings money is not always a calling in life.
  3. False settings. Upbringing leaves a big imprint on a person’s consciousness. The picture that the child observes, he then projects onto his life. So, if parents imposed the idea that first of all you need to try for others, then for yourself, then it will be difficult to decide on your interests.


How to determine what to do in life if there are no thoughts in your head at all? We must “absorb” literature.

Do I need to explain the benefits of reading? Unfortunately, nowadays, yes. Here's what reading books does:

  • Increased creativity.
  • Expanding your horizons.
  • Improving fantasy and imagination.
  • Erudition, and hence - self-confidence.
  • Increasing literacy, expanding vocabulary.
  • Improved attention.
  • Development of thinking and memory.
  • Improving communication and empathy skills.

A reading person has his own worldview, a deep view of the world, high values, principles and beliefs. Plus, some books are powerful motivators! Many people were inspired to self-realization by literature.

Finding a place in life

How to change your life for the better and where to start

In order to understand how to find yourself, you can use effective psychological techniques.


Finding meaning in life may not be so easy if your thoughts are confused, but usually the answer always lies on the surface. You just need to ask the right questions and answer them thoughtfully and honestly yourself.

One of the ways to find yourself in life is as follows: imagine yourself in a magical place where everything you wish can come true. It is necessary to determine: what existence will be like here, who a person wants to be in this place, what he will do, and what wealth will give him. Knowing the answers to all these questions, you can begin to figure out your life purpose.

Another way involves working on your thoughts for three days. There are three questions, and every day we work on one of them. During the day, they mentally return to it and try to find an answer or thoughts that lead to a solution. Everything that comes to mind is written down on a piece of paper.

A list of questions:

  1. What do you like to do? What does a person get pleasure from? What would he like to do in life?
  2. What are your best qualities? What abilities and talents do you have? What comes out better than others?
  3. How can an individual be useful to others? What can he give to this world?

Once all responses are received, they are carefully examined for matches. It is those fragments that match that have true meaning.

Honest answers are the key to finding your life path

Childhood memory

Children perceive the world as it is, without embellishment. Their thoughts and desires are always on the surface. Therefore, one of the good ways to understand yourself is to remember yourself as a child: what you dreamed of becoming in adulthood, what to do, what qualities to acquire.

After remembering their childhood desires, they project them onto the present, adult life. If your feelings suggest that it would be comfortable and easy in this role, this is your life purpose. If these ideas seem inappropriate, then you just need to listen to your desires.

The role of hobby

For some, their calling in life may be their favorite activity: needlework, cooking, drawing, crafts, collecting, etc. Today, there is ample evidence that handcraft is increasingly valued in a world where generic products have become widely available. With the right approach to developing your business, you can learn to make money doing what you love. At the same time, you should not limit yourself to one skill; you can expand your hobby. For example, if a girl likes to cook, she can open her own kitchen.

The Internet is becoming a great help in developing your own business. Social networks offer the use of personal pages as trading platforms for online sales.

Tenacity and Passion

How to understand your purpose in life - by analyzing what you do best. There are several methods that are based on motivating yourself. A person is struck by a question and answers himself.

A favorite activity can become a profession

Questions for motivation

What do I want to do?They write out a list of things to do, the results of which they feel pleasure from. Every interesting activity from birth to now can be a clue to the answer. It’s worth doing something that resonates inside.
What can't I live without?If there is some type of activity that regularly arouses interest, it is worth thinking about how it can be turned into a profession.
What do you want to learn?The two previous questions may make some people doubtful. Some people can’t remember what interests them or what it would be hard for them to do without. But everyone has an activity option that piques their interest. There is no age limit for learning new things. You can make a list of attractive activities and choose the one that suits you best.
What should we do next?Some are frightened by the thought that the chosen path may turn out to be wrong and will lead nowhere. Such thoughts will not give impetus to development. If the chosen business is a calling, in the future there will be no doubt about where to put your knowledge base. If a new activity doesn't get a response, it will remain a rewarding experience.
What don't you want to do?It is important to take into account not only your preferences, but also those actions that cause antipathy. These activities should be crossed out first.
What can I do best?To determine your best qualities, you can involve your loved ones. Sometimes positive qualities are more visible from the outside.
What is your area of ​​interest?Pay attention to which branch of occupation interests you most. This can apply not only to skills, but also to everyday industries: books, cinema, countries - all this can be united by one interest.

Note! Making money may not motivate you for long. A good technique in psychology is to imagine yourself as a rich person who can do any business. When there is no need to find a means of living, it is easier to find something you like.

Money is not the main motive in finding a goal

Who has a calling

How to love yourself - what does this mean in psychology, acceptance of your personality

Sooner or later, everyone is faced with questions: whether he is living his life correctly, whether he has chosen the right place of work, whether he is betraying his interests, whether he is betraying his goal, and what it is. Some people manage to quickly answer all the questions and, based on the answers, find their calling. Such people are easy to identify - they are happy to get up in the morning and go to work, they like what they do and enjoy life. Others cannot or do not want to listen to themselves. People can go to a job they don’t like, do something they don’t like, and think that this is how it should be, just because they didn’t want to understand themselves.

Compared to those who follow their goals and preferences, it may seem that others are not given this, that they do not have a calling in life. But the reason lies in the fact that some find the strength to recognize their best sides, others do not want or are afraid to change something.

Recommendations from psychologists and coaches

The best way to understand and find yourself in life is to listen to the advice of psychology experts and personal growth coaches. They offer 15 life hacks that will help you find your “I”:

  1. Be active, do something and remember the words of Einstein: “Life is like riding a bicycle. To maintain balance, you need to keep moving.” You can choose the place where you want to go.
  2. Get enough sleep. It is sleep, and not hard work, that is the basis of health, good mood, beauty, and productivity.
  3. "No". Thanks to Jim Carrey, the movie “Always Say Yes” turned out to be very good, but you shouldn’t take it literally and be afraid to say “no” if something doesn’t suit you. There will always be someone who wants to take advantage of a person’s kindness, even among his friends or relatives. Everyone has the right to refuse.
  4. Positive thinking. Belief in the best and a spirit of achievement.
  5. Destroying stereotypes. Habitual patterns often only hinder development.
  6. The road forward, despite the obstacles. The runway is often black, but if you start, it will definitely get better.
  7. Leave or change. This is about where you don’t like something: an unloved job with imaginary stability or a familiar relationship that has long been deprived of its former satisfaction and joy. To remain in such conditions means to voluntarily subscribe to stress, illness, neuroses and betrayal of your dreams.
  8. Rest.
  9. Study and knowledge. Every day it is important to learn something new: from books, courses, self-study or articles.
  10. Creation. The key to relief from overstrain, as well as the development of thinking, including creative thinking.
  11. Love yourself and make yourself happy. This is not only not prohibited, but also necessary. Without this, it is unlikely that you will be able to meet those who will experience the same feelings and desires for a person.
  12. Sample. No one is immune from mistakes, and there is no need for this, because mistakes are valuable experience and a stage for the next advancement.
  13. Goals and planning. There should be a detailed plan for at least the most important projects and moments.
  14. Constant new acquaintances. Connections will never be superfluous and sociable people move forward.
  15. Close the door to the past and past mistakes.

It is equally important to be open to others. Likewise, psychologists advise getting inspired from all sorts of individual sources.

How to find yourself? 7 questions to help you understand yourself better || Larisa Parfentyeva

When it's not too late

Negative character traits - how to find and correct negative qualities

If your date of birth indicates that your age is approaching 30, 40 or even older, this is not a reason to give up. You can search for your purpose all your life, this is not bad, because this path involves self-development. Therefore, any age will be suitable for finding goals.

Interests change at different ages. What seemed like the ultimate dream at age 18 may turn out to be funny and absurd by age 30. A person becomes the chooser of his own destiny when he decides to make changes. In order to be true to your goal, psychologists advise:

  1. remember the purpose of your actions;
  2. remember how much has already been done;
  3. Make important decisions when rested and well-slept.

Problems along the search path

Finding yourself and your life path (prednaznachenie v zhizni) is not an easy process, there are several reasons for this. On the one hand, those around you will have to get used to the person’s new role and type of activity. On the other hand, the person himself sometimes has to step over himself and doubts in search of his place. If the first reason is easier to cope with, the second implies serious work on yourself.

Main doubts:

  • Fear that the business will not be profitable. It’s worth looking to see if there are examples of similar businesses that make a profit. If yes, then everything is real.
  • Fear that the time for change is long past. This kind of thinking is inherent in society, where it is customary to go to university by a certain age, start a family, and so on. At the same time, there are many examples among men and women who radically changed their lives in adulthood and even old age and achieved success.
  • Fear of lack of necessary knowledge and skills. In the modern world, the sphere of education is developed, ranging from courses or master classes to higher education. After attending the introductory course for a couple of months, new knowledge already appears. With persistence, you can achieve a high level of skills in a particular area within a year.

Fear often prevents you from deciding to make changes

When there is no interest

Despite the fact that effective methods have been described above that help a person understand himself, there are cases when nothing interests him in life. There are few reasons for this; in psychology they are divided into internal and external. The first are a consequence of the fact that a person has lost the opportunity to do what he loves. The latter say that a person stops enjoying what he already has. The cause of internal symptoms is more difficult to determine than external ones. All we know for sure is that an individual experiences interest when he produces the hormone of happiness. If this does not happen, interest in what is happening is lost.

Psychologists recommend several ways to combat loss of interest:

  1. Think about what is missing in life and try to fill it.
  2. Find yourself a hobby, to do this, learn more about various types of activities.
  3. Change the environment for new experiences: communicating with new people, traveling.
  4. Engage in active activities, sports.
  5. Read more and follow proper nutrition.
  6. Remember what aroused interest in childhood. Perhaps childhood memories will provide the key to action.

Calling in life is not synonymous with profession. In order for a person to feel the fullness of life and realize his purpose, it is important to understand his desires. As soon as you understand your calling, all actions take on meaning.

Recalling childhood memories and favorite games

As a rule, favorite games or activities from childhood are those in which the child is most successful or gets the most pleasure. Sometimes it’s enough to dive into childhood memories to understand where your zone of maximum satisfaction is. What kind of activity have you always strived for, perhaps in spite of prohibitions, lessons imposed on circles by your parents? Did you want to sit at home embroidering and drawing? Or gather all the children from neighboring buildings and play school with them? Or were you ready to spend hours twirling in front of the mirror, wearing all possible and available mother’s jewelry? Or maybe the ball and everything related to sports was the basis of your motivation to complete all your household chores as quickly as possible?

Again, you can remember whether you liked to read books in solitude or were the organizer of all the games in the yard? Some, from childhood, have been indifferent to trade and money relations - such children either enthusiastically play “shop” and learn to count with “real money”, or try to exchange things with classmates, or start a new piggy bank, or enthusiastically play Monopoly, or find another idea for the next collection. And there are children who are ready to repair, build, embroider and knit from morning to evening.

Remember what you loved to do - this may be the key to understanding what you need to do in order to most successfully realize your personality.

( 1 rating, average 4 out of 5 )
Did you like the article? Share with friends:
For any suggestions regarding the site: [email protected]
Для любых предложений по сайту: [email protected]