There is a dark streak in the life of each of us, and it can drag on for a long time. Sometimes this makes the future seem hopeless. And a person in this situation is inclined to think that the best is already behind him, and only disappointments lie ahead. How to deal with this? Should we expect outside help? Or open your second wind and continue on your way? On the one hand, you begin to understand that the worst thing is inaction. But on the other hand, you are always afraid of messing things up even more and making things worse.
Why so bad?
There are several common causes of negative emotional well-being:
- Troubles in family life are one of the most common causes of depression. In quarrels with loved ones, it is difficult to choose a winner. No matter how the situation develops, every relative will eventually feel bad.
- Conflicts at work - employees are not chosen. Often you have to demonstrate a loyal attitude towards people with different, rather difficult characters. Divergence of opinions is a completely natural phenomenon.
- Deterioration of health - you often have to wonder why it’s so bad when the body suffers from an illness. A physically unhealthy person gets out of the usual rhythm of life and experiences negative emotions.
- Problems in love relationships - the desire to solely possess a person dear to your heart, along with jealousy, forces you to struggle with complex, mixed feelings. As a result, a whole storm of emotions plays out. Mental experiences often change from a feeling of complete happiness and satisfaction to tears of sorrow. Confusion in personal relationships can cause prolonged depression.
Organize everything
When you feel bad and want to cry, you need to try to soberly assess the situation. Regardless of the severity of the problem, any trouble can be resolved. You need to think carefully about what can be improved for the better through personal efforts, and what adversities are easier to overcome thanks to the help of others.
Sometimes it is enough to simply eliminate the root cause of a negative mental state. For example, it is worth considering leaving a job that forces you to endure daily abuse from your bosses and employees. If the troubles lie in a complete lack of mutual understanding with your spouse, it may be better to decide to break off the relationship than to be in an atmosphere of endless scandals every day.
It is important to correct your own mistakes that do not allow you to find peace of mind. Do everything possible so that your conscience no longer torments you due to previously unfair treatment of loved ones. Ask for forgiveness from friends and relatives if your soul is heavy as a result of torment of conscience.
How to live when everything is bad and everyone is against you
Just find a point to start turning these raging currents that carry you onto the rocks back. Just swimming against the current is useless; you need to find at least a small cliff that you can cling to and rest. In life, that rock can be something that remains stable and doesn't turn against you. If you have an angry boss, but good relationships with your colleagues, spend more time with them. If they smoke and you don’t, then just walk with them to the smoking room and discuss the boss there. Joint ridicule of the “enemy” does wonders. You seem to look at your problem from the outside. Go out to lunch with your colleagues; you can also have a good conversation in a positive way while eating.
Your sense of humor will help you shake off your sadness and despondency, and everything else (not just work) will begin to return to normal.
Look for a solution, even if there seems to be no way out
It’s always worth thinking about what exactly is causing the disgusting mood. You just have to laugh at minor failures. For example, try to present them in the form of a humorous story. If you are familiar with the work of M. Zhvanetsky, understand and love him, it will not be difficult for you to repeat the successes of this author, albeit not as sparklingly.
Take all troubles as a lesson for the good of the future
It is quite possible that the trouble that happened was sent to you by God himself, so that you stop and rethink your life, your actions and attitude towards the situation. Perhaps you would be in danger of another trouble of truly monstrous proportions, but you can now avoid it, because you have been warned from above. Negative experience is also the result of an experiment called “life”. And you, a great scientist, now know how to change the parameters of the system so that the next experiment will be successful and bring a discovery.
Prepare yourself that everything will be fine
You took something into account in the system by building it anew. Now you can start a new experience. Does the system seem to be out of balance? Adjust its parameters or start all over again, only more carefully. Life is a whole science, and each of us is a great scientist, magician and sorcerer, performing sacred acts in this laboratory. You can influence the situation, and not only it can influence you. This is a positive attitude. Now experiment!
Avoid loneliness
When a person is left to himself for a long time, the soul becomes more and more vulnerable. A person is constantly subject to self-analysis. My thoughts are in complete chaos. The vector of possible events changes in opposite directions. Self-pity layers negativity. A subconscious feeling of resentment, fear and anger arises.
What to do when you feel bad, but there is no way to avoid loneliness? Avoid spending most of the day in bed, remaining in silence. It’s better to turn on your favorite music loudly and watch inspiring and funny films. Cleaning looks like a good distraction from problems. Start rearranging your home. Changes in the interior will refresh the boring reality and allow you to tune in to finding solutions that can change the situation for the better.
Look at the problem from the outside
If your heart is heavy, what should you do? Advice from psychologists speaks of the need for a sober, impartial assessment of the situation. Think about how dire the future or existing circumstances are. Take a look at your immediate surroundings. Many people probably have to deal with more serious problems. However, no one stops fighting. It might be worth chatting live with people who have similar problems, or starting a correspondence on social networks.
People's bitterness is not your concern
When someone tries to suppress your confidence, erase your success, diminish you as a person, grit your teeth and smile! Don't let others see your fear! Show character! Don't let your ill-wishers enjoy their victory over you. Someone doesn’t like you, they don’t like your actions or thinking, but they don’t care about anyone! Always be yourself! Don't you dare let people or circumstances break you or change you! Don't listen to what you need to be like, how to communicate, how to act! This is your life! It's your problem, what will happen to you, no one else! Remain yourself despite everything!
Spend more time with friends
Who to talk to when you feel bad? In such a situation, it is worth sharing your thoughts with true comrades, discussing problems, simply pouring out your soul and trying to find the right solution. When it’s simply unbearable to go beyond the four walls, call your friends on the phone. Close people who really care about your problems will definitely want to schedule a meeting. Having heard about the causes of depression, good comrades will not only give useful advice for solving problems, but will also take the conversation in a completely different, more positive direction. Thus, during a meeting, you can take your mind off troubles for a while and part with restless thoughts.
What else can you do when you feel bad? Try to organize an evening in the company of cheerful friends. A meeting can be held not only at home. Go to fun places together. A noisy environment does not always allow you to get out of a psychological crisis. However, all sorts of fun will serve as a good distraction.
It’s hard and lonely at heart because of breaking up with a girl
Here you need to think: is everything so bad? If she even ran away to another guy, then this could be a temporary infatuation. Imagine that you are married to her, and she became interested in a stranger. But having survived this stormy romance, she may well return to her family when she breaks up with her lover. If you can’t live without her, then just be nearby, but in the shadows. Offer to remain friends and observe how serious everything is with the new couple. Maybe this guy is just a “soap bubble”, worthless and wanting to please everyone of the opposite sex. Then he will quickly get bored with your girlfriend, he will find someone else, and then your beloved will have to look for someone to hide under his wing. And “formers” are best suited for this role. And that’s exactly what you are. Forward!
It also happens that you yourself got excited and quarreled. Find the courage to reconcile and do it beautifully - with flowers, gifts, declarations of love. Often this helps to thaw a woman's heart.
If this doesn’t work out, then you just need to try to survive your grief by occupying your mind with some difficult task and your soul with creativity. How did “Moonlight Sonata” come into being? Legend says that L. Beethoven at that moment lost hope of marriage with his beloved girl: she was married to another man. Only historians know who this girl is, but the entire civilized humanity has heard the “Moonlight Sonata”!
Take action
Troubles disappear on their own only in exceptional cases. Inaction causes problems to be resolved indefinitely. What to do if you feel bad? Psychologists advise trying to do everything possible to resolve existing conflicts as soon as possible. As practice shows, from whining day after day, thinking about the cause of misfortunes and the frailty of life, no changes in a positive direction occur.
Play some sports
What to do when you feel bad, how to try to lead a more active lifestyle? The good thing about sports is that physical activity forces the body to produce pleasure hormones. During training, your emotional state changes. Thoughts switch to searching for internal reserves to perform difficult exercises. Even a short evening run will allow you to get rid of unnecessary thoughts before bed and have a quality rest at night.
A good solution for releasing negative emotions is training with a punching bag. This is an especially good idea when there is a grudge against a loved one lurking in your soul. It is recommended to play sports in the company of friends. In this case, the spirit of competition will not force you to give up training after the first time.
Sports achievements are a good source for increasing self-confidence. Individuals who are determined to succeed are more likely to overcome emotional turmoil. Among other things, training makes it possible to acquire a toned body appearance, which will allow you to be satisfied with yourself.
What to do when everything is very bad
At the very least, you should try to act. If you sit with your hands folded, sooner or later this will lead to depression, and not everyone is able to get out of it on their own, without resorting to the help of a psychotherapist or even a psychiatrist. To be more precise, these are units. It is best to try to find out the reason, to identify the moment after which everything became bad, because when one thing clings to another, it can be difficult to find out exactly where it all started. But some insignificant trifle can throw you out of balance - a passing moment that was not even immediately noticed, but has sunk deep into the subconscious. This is enough to instill in a person uncertainty in the decisions made, and after that everything may not go as desired. And after that, troubles can grow like a snowball.
However, a lump of snow can melt, and to melt it, you simply need to heat it. In the same way, you need to warm your soul with something so that adversity will recede. After all, troubles themselves may not be as terrible as our negative reaction to them. The criterion for good tolerance of adversity is the ability to return to your groove as quickly as possible. That's why you just need to answer two Russian questions: who is to blame and what to do?
Find out the reasons why it is morally bad
Of course, there are completely objective reasons why one may feel bad at heart: a loved one has died or a loved one has left, there has been a quarrel with parents or a close friend. At work, life may not be given by a boss or some presumptuous colleague. Of course, the world hasn’t come together like a wedge at work, but you still can’t change it overnight, and a bad team greatly poisons life. A student often experiences strong moral stress during test and examination sessions, and it is no wonder that it gives way to apathy. Then the holidays are not a joy. And sometimes it happens that everything at home begins to fall into disrepair: one thing breaks down after another and it seems that the entire world around us is being destroyed. In the end, it can undermine your own health. A long delay in recovery can also add to despondency, especially when colleagues or friends go to the gym or go on outdoor activities, but this is impossible for you.
From these examples you can choose something that suits your situation. But it is quite possible that you will discover some other reason for your bad mood. And when you know what to fight, you can already think about how best to do it.
Don't let panic turn into depression
The first negative reaction to events can be active; in itself it can be an outburst of anger or a feeling of despair, but this is not depression, but rather panic.
Panic moods arise due to a feeling of threatening danger. Therefore, you must either confront this danger with dignity, or escape from it. Exactly how to proceed can be understood from the example.
Let's say the danger is great, and can be compared to a train rushing towards you or a forest fire breaking out. It is quite reasonable to step off the tracks and let the train pass, and then continue on its way. It is also advisable to run away from a forest fire somewhere closer to a body of water in order to sit out the raging elements in the water.
If the danger is not of such a global nature - for example, it is a hooligan who is waiting around the corner to rob you - then you can arm yourself with something heavy, take a stun gun with you, or use a martial arts technique you know to neutralize the attacker. In the end, you can just go the other way and let yourself wait... by the sea for the weather.
We have looked at physical objects as examples, but much the same thing happens at the moral level. For example, a force majeure circumstance can be called the closure of the enterprise where you work, or your particular department. You cannot reverse this process, but you have another way out: start looking for a job almost as soon as you learn about the impending layoff. You begin to act, and circumstances no longer put so much pressure on you, since you gain some degree of freedom and independence.
If you come across a bad team at work, then you can try to move to another department or, secretly from your superiors, also start looking for a new job. If you don’t get along with the team, then it’s not a shame to lose such a job.
If you have a quarrel with your girlfriend or wife, then you have about a thousand or even more attempts to improve the relationship. And if the first, second, and so on... times nothing works out, then come up with many more plans on how to charm your beloved, what to give her, say, write in an SMS or in a letter so that she thaws.
The most important thing is not to give up. You need to move your paws, like the frog from Panteleev’s fairy tale, which fell into the milk and knocked down a piece of butter in it, which helped it get out.
Organize your holiday
What to do when you feel bad? What to do? According to psychologists, creating a festive mood is an extremely effective solution for eliminating feelings of endless sadness and suppressing anxiety. If there are no significant events planned in the near future, use cash savings. Go to the mall and pick out the things you've always dreamed of.
Attend interesting events. Go to the premiere of a good film, attend a concert of your favorite performer, go to the theater. Consider spending time in a sauna. Complement your pleasant, relaxing experience with a massage. It is only natural that enjoying such activities is much more fun in the company of friends.
Perhaps it's time to take a break from everyday work and go on vacation. Discuss the situation with your superiors. If you don’t have enough money, borrow some money from your loved ones and go on vacation as far from home as possible. Leave behind everything that is associated with a bad state of mind.
Manage your life...
Not happy with your material wealth? Start thinking about how to improve it and improve it. Don’t sit on your ass at a job where you earn pennies, whining and complaining from morning to evening, without changing anything.
Not happy with your appearance? Start working on it. Sign up for a gym, a swimming pool, wherever you want, go to a salon, I don’t know, for some kind of procedure, buy new clothes, etc.
Do you miss feelings and love, your (same) girl next to you? OK. For example, start looking for a girl. Come outside. Meet me. Communicate. Just not with just anyone - as long as it is, but with those - who you really like, because your goal is to find yourself a good, worthy girl who will make you happy, with whom you will share your life, grief and joy, etc. and not with whom you fuck and you will break up or something like that. Understand? And vice versa, for girls, with men.
Do you lack emotions in general? Start doing something to receive these emotions. Jump from a parachute, bungee jump, meet a girl, ride a motorcycle, ride a fast car, shoot with a machine gun, pistol, go to another city, country, travel, well, in short, you can give a million examples.
Well, etc. and so on. on any question = you can write it all down. Do something.
Don't let negative thoughts enter your head
Draw an exclusively positive picture of the future in your mind. Often experiences are associated with a premonition of something bad in the future. To maintain peace of mind, the main thing is to prevent the emergence of negative emotions that have nothing to do with the objective reality of the current moment. It has been proven that thoughts about bad things act as a kind of magnet for similar events. If you worry all day long about possible troubles in the future, then problems will certainly become a reality.
Try to think positively
Don't forget that thoughts are material. If you think about bad things, you will notice bad things around you, because you have concentrated all your thought processes on the bad things around you. I agree, it sounds easy in words... I use this technique: when a bad thought gets into my head, I spit it over my left shoulder, knock on the head (thinking bad head, what are you thinking about) and then knock on wood, driving the thought into the tree. Having done this action, I begin to repeat that I am happy, everything is fine with me, that I am building my life the way I want it. Start thinking positively, form in your head what you want to have and surround yourself with positive thoughts, even if everything is bad now. Avoid people who think negatively and constantly look at everything with contempt and condemnation; at the moment, you will not get anything good from communicating with them.
