There comes a moment in life when a woman suddenly clearly understands that no one needs her. And this is not at all “pushing yourself up” in front of a young man, not a way to beg a new gift from your parents, and not “girl talk” with a friend. This is a distinct sensation that means there is emptiness and coldness in the middle. And nothing matters: having a family, children, an apartment, a car, working with a large number of colleagues... There can be a lot of everything around, but the feeling of abandonment and uselessness comes to the fore.
Is it possible to get rid of this condition forever?
You yourself are well aware of how much this negative belief bothers you. Working with this logic and convincing you is long and unreasonable. You yourself understand with your brain that this is not an entirely correct conclusion and it cannot be applied 100% to all life situations. But you continue to think like that. Therefore, we will take a different path and act without logic.
I have good news for you: in literally an hour of independent work, without expensive consultations with psychologists and psychotherapists, you can cope with this once and for all your life.
Just without illusions - this does not mean that in an hour a crowd of your relatives and friends will come running to you, vying with each other to tell you how boring and joyless their life is without you. No. You will simply erase this belief of yours once and for all, which plunges you into a depressive state.
The record of your life will no longer “stick” at this point. You will experience all your negative emotions associated with this belief in an hour. And then you will be completely free from this belief of yours and from the emotions associated with it.
Your work at this hour will not be easy: you will be completely immersed in a state where no one needs you, you will live it completely here and now. You will cry and experience the whole gamut of negative experiences associated with rejection and loneliness.
For what? In order to free yourself from them; so that it no longer controls your behavior, your relationships with others and you personally. If you really want to consciously work through this state in yourself called “nobody needs me,” then I offer you a simple and effective way to do this yourself using the practice of the Logical method of erasing negative programs from the subconscious of academician S.I. Losev.
Where to call if no one needs you?
If you are alone and it seems to you that no one needs you, call a psychologist.
It often happens that depression fetters a person so much that he is no longer “inspired” by advice from various publications or the persuasion of friends. What to do in this case? Where to call if no one needs you?
If the feeling of spiritual emptiness is literally suffocating and preventing you from living, you can call the emergency psychological help line:
- +7 495 051
Qualified specialists will make every effort to give you the joy of life. They will teach you to enjoy every moment. Psychologists will always listen and try to help anyone who experiences a feeling of loneliness. Good luck!
What you will need for practice
Everything you need for work fits into several points:
- an hour of your time to practice;
- an alarm clock that will notify you that 60 minutes of work have expired;
- a room with a chair (sofa or stool) where no one will disturb you during your practice;
- You may also need paper and pencil.
This is all the little you need to get the job done. But the most important thing is your desire and willingness to part with your negative belief.
If you are ready to do this right now, then start a practice called “Key Word Therapy.”
Find the positives in this situation
Think about the positive aspects that the current situation can bring you. If you find at least one compelling argument, then it will be much easier for you to survive all the troubles. Perhaps you have some special skills that made you understand that you do not belong in the company of some people. People who have learned to see what is written between the lines realize the true picture of events much faster. Therefore, if you feel unnecessary in relationships with some people, do not rush to get upset. Perhaps this is your salvation, because separation can be much more painful if it happens after several years of false friendship or love. In addition, scientists have proven that rejected people can develop creative inclinations much faster because they feel different from others.
It is worth analyzing all aspects of the current situation, and then making an extensive list of the positive aspects that it can bring you. Perhaps loneliness will allow you to spend more time alone with yourself. Such reflections often help to understand which people are worth continuing to communicate with and which people should no longer be trusted.
What you need to do to overcome the feeling of uselessness
To begin, set your alarm for exactly 60 minutes. Then sit in your chair, close your eyes and begin to repeat to yourself your negative belief - no one needs me. Without opening your eyes, do not stop repeating this phrase monotonously in your mind until the alarm clock rings.
Did your alarm clock ring? That's it, the Key Word Therapy practice is over. Now you can open your eyes.
Yes, it's that simple. Simple in words. It is not always simple and easy to live all 60 minutes of this practice while your negative belief is “rooted” from your subconscious.
But now, after practice, you feel lightness and calm. In the next day or two or three you will feel as if you have increased strength and energy. This happens because all your energy that you invested in negative experiences about your uselessness will return to you.
It’s so easy to work through any of your negative and limiting beliefs with the help of the practices of Academician Losev. These beliefs are erased thanks to the well-studied effect of dosed monotony on the human brain.
These scientific studies have been well tested, patented, and formulated into specific and effective methods for independent practice - all this together is called the Logical method of erasing negative programs from the subconscious. The author of these developments is academician Stanislav Ivanovich Losev, doctor of sciences and full member of the MABT Academy.
Pay attention to your thoughts
What to do if you feel unwanted? Most likely, you have a negative opinion about yourself or your self-esteem is greatly underestimated. If you notice that you are constantly thinking about bad things, then you should start to control your thoughts, and also try to understand the situations that lead to them.
Stop constantly thinking about being rejected. Try to occupy your head with thoughts about work, study or other important matters. To distract yourself, you can try doing something. For example, go shopping, go to the gym, or go rollerblading.
What's next after practice?
After practice, you don’t need to do anything else - rest and restore your strength. If during practice other phrases intrusively came to you, then write them down during practice. The next day you can work on the next one, then another one from the list.
Often in practice similar negative programs come along. In this case, often the following: no one needs a child, neither my husband nor children need me, my parents don’t need me, my mother doesn’t need me, how to continue to live in this world, no one loves me, I don’t want to live, and many others. Everyone has their own programs, individual ones.
Also, after practicing, after a couple of days, notice yourself if you again want to go to the forum to read about being useless to anyone, find a poem, song, quotes, prose or pictures about this condition, or talk about it with someone. In this case, repeat the Keyword Therapy exercise with the same phrase.
The vast majority of negative programs (about 80%) are cut off by Keyword Therapy the first time. But sometimes there are programs of enormous mental power, into which a colossal amount of energy is invested - with these you need to work again, for another hour.
Thus, as a result of your independent work, you can easily and simply eliminate a huge number of negative programs from your subconscious. This is very rewarding work, since its consequences will be your increased overall energy potential, improved overall well-being and mood. you will get rid of these “sharp corners” (= negative programs) that your family and friends constantly “cling” to, so your relationship with them will also improve.
If your condition is close to depression, then I ask you to devote time to this too and work on it with self-care - again, independently and effectively. I wrote how to do this in the article “How to overcome depression on your own without medications...”. Stop by.
Try and master the simple and effective mindfulness practices of Academician Losev’s method. If you have any questions about your situation or the results of your practices, feel free to ask them in the comments. I will be happy to help you sort everything out.
Develop defense mechanisms
People who can stand up for themselves in a stressful situation cope better with various types of refusals than others. Their level of cortisol, the hormone responsible for stress, is much lower than that of other individuals, so they can accept even the most negative events with a cool mind.
To learn this technique, you will first need to remember the moments when some people really needed you. Then focus on them. The more you think about pleasant things, the sooner unpleasant feelings will recede away. You should also show your will in order to isolate yourself from people who have rejected you.
Only communicate with nice people
Meeting new people will help you learn how to communicate socially and will also increase your self-esteem. People who ignore you do not fall into this category, so forget about their existence, they are not worthy of communicating with you.
It is worth making a new acquaintance or telling a loved one about your feelings and experiences. There is nothing wrong with talking about emotions if it happens in a calm and comfortable environment. Perhaps a family member or close friend will stand up for you the next time someone treats you unfairly. Having allies you can rely on is very important.
Reasons for social rejection
Do you feel lonely and unwanted? What to do in this situation? Identifying the possible reasons why society refuses to accept you can be quite difficult, but it can often help solve the problem. Thanks to this, you can find the root of the problem and begin to deal with unwanted feelings and thoughts.
People with mental disorders are much more likely to experience negative emotions. It is possible that you have some kind of undiagnosed psychological illness that is interfering with your interactions with peers.
Individuals with health problems are quite often the objects of general ridicule due to certain stereotypes about a particular disease (obesity, diabetes, etc.). Think carefully about whether your condition affects how people communicate with you.
Scientists have found that a person perceives words that come from the mouth of a representative of another nation or race much more keenly. Perhaps they refuse to communicate with you precisely because you belong to a different nationality. Such communication is worthless!
Adviсe
The feeling of uselessness in psychology is considered as one of the aspects of low self-esteem. To prevent such a turn of events, you can take note of the following tips:
- Tell people you trust about your condition.
- Surround yourself with people who always support you and give you positivity.
- Don't let others influence your condition. If you feel abandoned in the company of friends, tell them about it. If nothing changes, you will have to look for new friends, but your nerves will be fine.
- If you're not invited to a party, find something more fun to do instead of being upset all evening. In any case, you can celebrate the holiday at home.
Calmness and a rational attitude towards the situation are the key to success and well-being. Think about yourself first, not about those who cause you trouble.
How to become more interesting?
In most cases, the reluctance of your peers to communicate with you rests on the way you behave in society. It’s worth taking a good look at your behavior, because some actions may cause other people to distance themselves from you. For example, scientists have long found that children who are rejected by their peers find it quite difficult to start communicating with other children or to fight back in case of provocation.
To avoid unpleasant situations, you should engage in self-development. For example, reading psychological literature will help develop communication skills. You can learn to stand up for yourself in the gym by attending a boxing or karate class. If you think that in such places they only teach you to wave your hands, then you are deeply mistaken. First of all, the coach will try to identify the reason that led to the inferiority complex and teach you to respect yourself.
