The former C-student has already become a boss, the poor fellow who was expelled from the first year is generally a cool businessman and does not leave Europe, and a pretty but stupid fellow student somehow got a job in an international corporation on a very international salary.
What's the matter? How do they do it?
If we very briefly try to express the essence of the problem, we get the following. When a person has learned to think, analyze, and reflect for many years in a row, then he will undoubtedly be good at it. However, in real life, pure mental activity, not supported by any actions, is of absolutely no use. That is why very often in the state, scientific and simply human hierarchy, energetic fools find themselves at the top, who, although not burdened with intellect, have ebullient energy and the ability to act. They may not be familiar with the theory of relativity, but they know for sure that even a small real action is sometimes more important than long thoughts about how to perform it.
Let's learn to act!
Reasons for the abundance of thoughts in the head
Nothing comes out of nowhere. Everything has its own reason. The fact that an endless stream of thoughts rushes through your head indicates some difficulties in your life.
- Problems at work. What will the boss think? Why didn't your colleague invite you to lunch? Again, your salary is being delayed... You spend a lot of time at work, so you are constantly thinking about work problems or relationships in the team.
- Financial difficulties. No matter what anyone says, we are dependent on money. The fewer there are, the greater the anxiety. How can you force yourself not to think about anything if the loan repayment deadlines are running out?
- Health problems. When you have a disease, your body's functioning becomes disrupted. You are worried about your health. Hypochondriacs who like to give themselves imaginary ailments especially suffer.
- Failures in your personal life. Relationships (or lack thereof) also cause a flood of experiences. You are wondering how to arrange your personal life. Or you worry about them because of a quarrel with your loved one.
- Weather. The environment often has a negative impact on overall well-being. For example, if there is dampness and slush outside the window, the general emotional state may be disturbed, a person becomes immersed in gray thoughts and cannot relax.
- Intense mental load. If your work involves a lot of mental stress, then you can even go over work matters in your head at home. Often your body is in your bed, but your mind is still at work. The same applies to students during the session. They constantly think about exams and can drive themselves to mental exhaustion.
There are other reasons why different thoughts pop into your head. Often the reason may be some event that stirred your soul.
How to remove unnecessary thoughts and calm down? Use a few tips to help you not think about problems, calm down as quickly as possible and clear your mind of caustic thoughts.
Think about the present moment
Important events happen in our lives. These could be important exams, interviews or competitions. Whenever we are faced with such a situation, we want to be as prepared as possible. Before this, we think a lot, prepare and do self-assessment. These are the necessary things.
However, preparation can become overwhelming. Endless thoughts begin. This often leads to panic before significant events in our lives. As a result, we can ruin everything. To avoid this, start preparing for the event long before it happens. Then, as it approaches, you will feel calm because you know that you are completely ready. Focus on the present moment. This is a surefire way to succeed.
- How to be successful in everything you do
The steps outlined above can help you eliminate unnecessary rumination from your life. As a result, you will be able to enjoy peace of mind and achieve success.
Distribute what is important and what is not
Very often, a person who thinks about everything in a row stresses himself out over things that are not important to him at all. You have watched the news, which contains negativity from all over the world, and are already worried about a bus that overturned somewhere in Bolivia. Distribute what is really important to you and what is not worth worrying about. Whenever a negative thought enters your head, ask yourself how it applies to you. Introduce some kind of censorship and filter out unnecessary garbage that does not concern you in any way.
How to stop being distracted and start living
Leo Babauta is a famous coach and psychologist, a specialist in developing healthy habits, and the creator of the popular blog ZenHabits.
Yesterday I didn't have a very focused day - I got my work done, but I also read about my new personal interests (mainly programming and cycling), played an iPhone game with the kids, read a bunch of articles on the Internet and really I wrote little of what I had planned.
The digital world distracted me from reading and meditation last week too. I think it haunts us all to one degree or another.
Today I realized this, closed all the tabs I was going to read, bookmarked a few things to read later, turned off the game on my phone, closed my email and took a break.
I was meditating.
I took a shower and thought about what was important to me right now.
Then I went for a bike ride.
Then I found a place without Wi-Fi and started writing.
Below is a guide for my fellow Internet addicts. For those who find it equally difficult to fight temptations and distractions.
Realize in time
The habit of distraction is a treacherous thing because we often don't even realize we're distracted. It creeps up on us like old age, and suddenly we are exposed to it and powerless.
But we are not powerless. We have power - our awareness, and we can develop it right now. Pay attention to the websites you go to, how often you look at your phone, and how much time you spend in front of a screen each day.
When I wanted to become aware of my urges to smoke, I carried with me a pencil and a piece of paper on which I wrote a note whenever I felt the urge to smoke. I didn’t forbid myself to smoke, but first I definitely had to make a note.
In this way I strengthened my awareness muscles, and it allowed me to insert some empty space between the urge and my subsequent action. This space has become a place of choice. That's where I got my strength from.
See what's happening
Now you can explore the reasons. After following temptations online for several hours (reading everything about bicycles and programming), I stopped and asked myself: “What’s the big deal?” It's about fear: fear that I don't know what I'm doing and that I'll screw it up. Now I know that it doesn't matter whether I screw up or not. My worth as a person is not determined by my successes and failures. So I closed all the tabs and decided to focus on just one program and just one bike ride. I'll learn as I go.
I'm often distracted by fantasies - I really hope that I will become a great programmer or start winning bicycle races. If I think realistically, I won't have time for this. So you need to give up your fantasies - unless you intend to devote your whole life to them for a year or two.
And of course, we are often distracted because we are afraid of missing something. We can't take part in all the cool things everyone around us is doing, but we don't want to miss them either. That's why we're always trying to spot something online, something hot. And completely unimportant. Another thing is important - to be harmonious, to do what makes people’s lives better, to be compassionate, to help. Instead, focus on the most important thing you can change in the world.
Take action
So, you have achieved awareness and examined the reasons for your behavior. If not, take a short walk (preferably outside) and think about them. This article will have to wait.
Now for the next steps. You can do one, you can do several.
— Close as many browser tabs as possible . Bookmark some, save some to read later in Instapaper or Pocket, forget about the rest.
— Give up your favorite distractions for a few hours . Games, social networks, news. After all, the truth is, there is no need to look there so often.
— Write down the times when you will check your email and other messages . Well, for example, work with mail for 20 minutes at 10 am, at 1 pm and at 4 pm. Write down this schedule and stick to it.
— Step away from the computer . Take a walk. Go for a bike ride. Go for a run. Take your children to the park.
- Meditate . Sit quietly for just a couple of minutes, without any distractions, and pay attention to your breathing. Return to your breathing when you become distracted.
- Read . A paper book. Close all screens and allow yourself to read quietly and calmly.
— Find a place without Wi-Fi . Or turn off your router. Write without distractions. Close all applications except the text editor.
— Delete accounts on social networks . I recently returned to Facebook to connect with relatives during my father's illness and death. But the privacy violations and all sorts of useless things posted there sent me on the run, and I deleted my account again.
— Remove unnecessary applications from your phone . Games, social media, whatever you turn to when you want to distract yourself.
— Eat without the device in your hands . Pay attention to the food, the textures, the flavors, the colors, the health of what you put into your body.
Of course, there is much more. Vacation. Practice mindfulness throughout the day. Take a break from the screen for the whole day. The possibilities are endless.
Understand what's important
What is really important to you? Social network? News? What is everyone else doing? Games? We try to do everything, but then we don't focus on anything. None of our little fantasies will come true if we take on everything at once.
What business do you want to implement right now? Can you focus on it for at least a month? If not, then it may not be that important to you.
What things are most important to you right now? Choose 3-4, at most 5. How much of your time is devoted to them? Can you save time on something else to focus on them? Can you give the 4 most important things your full attention?
The four most important things in my life are my writing, my family, my health and my education. And no, I don't always give them my full attention. I often have to step back and remind myself of what's important.
Original post - zenhabits.net/distraction/
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Replacing negativity with positivity
How not to think about anything bad? Just replace the negative with something good. For example, you made mistakes in a report and received a reprimand from your boss. Instead of exaggerating the situation and beating yourself up, come up with a new positive scenario. Imagine handing in a revised report and receiving praise from your superiors for your accurate work. Bring this replacement of negative to positive to automaticity. If negativity pops into your head, your brain will automatically correct it to something positive.
Your decision is never final
We tend to strive to come to a great, correct, final decision that will forever determine our future life. From a realistic point of view, this will never happen. No decision is final because conditions change and our perspective must adapt.
There is no single solution that will make our entire future life path the way we would like. This makes long thinking pointless. It is important to think critically before making a decision. However, do not get carried away by long thoughts. Accept that your decision may be wrong. Moreover, understand that life is a process of learning from mistakes.
Help from loved ones
If you have obsessive thoughts running through your head, you need to share them with someone. Not everyone can trust a psychologist. Yes, and this is not always necessary. Sometimes it’s enough just to talk to a loved one and voice your feelings. When you don't hush up your fears, but talk about them openly, you take an important step. You get rid of anxiety and mental stress. Having spoken out, you may notice that all your fears were far-fetched and there is actually nothing catastrophic. If you find yourself in a situation where you have no one to share your aspirations with, you can take a piece of paper and put all your fears in writing.
The first steps are very difficult
It happens that we stagnate on the threshold of a big and difficult task, not daring to take the first step, not knowing which way to approach the task; the task seems completely overwhelming. Think about what you can do right now, some small step towards completing a huge task. It turns out that the very first step is no more difficult than when performing an ordinary task and is quite possible. If you realize this, it will be much easier to take action.
In addition, after taking the first step, you will be surprised to notice that you have quietly passed half of the second stage. Things will work out if you decide to take action.
Take your mind off your problems
How can you not think about anything at all when you are locked within four walls alone with yourself? If you sit at home all day, then it’s no wonder that all sorts of nonsense pops into your head. Why not unwind? How about making an appointment with an old friend? Get yourself out into the street, immerse yourself in a crowd, meet someone you can tell about all your experiences. It is quite possible that your friend’s opinion will have a sobering effect on you. And being outside the house will help you take your mind off oppressive thoughts.
Understand that long thoughts do not lead to truth.
Through long reflection, we want to understand what our decisions can lead to. Essentially, it is a search for truth. We try to predict what our decisions will lead to before we make them. However, pragmatic philosophy has shown us that these are futile attempts.
The only way to know the true consequences of a decision is not to think about it, but to act on it. You will never know what will come of your plans until you implement them.
Examples of situations that require no thought but only decisive action include choosing a school, moving to a new location, getting married, changing careers, or getting divorced. No matter how much you think about these actions, you will never know where they will lead until you do them. Thus, excessive thinking does not lead to truth, but action does.
Water to the rescue
It has long been believed that contact with water puts thoughts in order. If you want to not think about anything, going to the pool will help you the best. Swimming relaxes the body and distracts from obsessive thoughts. If you don't want to go to the pool, just soak in the bath. After a hard day, give yourself some real relaxation, lie down in warm water. You can add flavored salt or essential oils. A contrast shower also helps. Believe me, after this procedure, bad thoughts will disappear without a trace. The easiest option (if you are at work) is to wash your face with cool water or simply apply a moistened napkin to your temples.
Icebreaker
The essence of this method is to associate yourself with a person or object that personifies purposeful and unstoppable action.
Imagine that you are a powerful icebreaker. You calmly and confidently move where you need to go, and problems, hesitations and doubts split and evaporate under the pressure of your energy. Wherever you go, you make your own way, nothing can stop you or lead you astray.
Another version of the same method is to remember a person emitting energy. “Put on” this image for yourself. Imagine how this person would act in your place and imitate his behavior.
For many successful businessmen, this image is Donald Trump. He is certainly energetic, and simply revels in the struggle and victories. He tirelessly implements new projects, earning new millions of dollars.
Donald Trump is just an example, you can choose anyone, a famous person or someone you know who is energetic and purposeful.
Meditation practice
Even a short meditation will lead your thoughts in a constructive direction. Of course, meditation still needs to be learned. But believe me, this practice will do some spring cleaning in your brain. If you don’t really want to meditate, you can simply do breathing practices. For example, before going to bed, when negative thoughts keep you awake, take a few deep breaths. Let them be slow and measured. To avoid thinking about anything, concentrate on your breathing as intensely as possible.
Nike
Don't be surprised, this is exactly the same Nike - a manufacturer of sporting goods. This company has the famous slogan “Just do it” - “Just do it!” In other words, don't take too long to swing - just do it!
It seems too simple, but it works flawlessly. There is a wise saying: “The expectation of punishment is much worse than the punishment itself.” While we are thinking about what difficult, tedious or unpleasant task we have ahead of us, we are wasting our energy, and much more than would be needed to complete the task itself. We live through a situation dozens of times that we could have forgotten about long ago. At the same time, negative emotions literally stick to us, turning into an impenetrable pillow that prevents us from acting and moving forward.
Instead of letting our imaginations paint pictures of each other worse than the other, let's focus on action. Most of the tension will be spent on action, and there will simply be no energy or time left for distracted emotions. On the contrary, you can often even experience pleasure from the process of work itself and from the consciousness that the process has begun. Thus, immediate action will relieve stress and bring results and satisfaction.
Let's grab the weights
Sport is also a great way to distract from obsessive thoughts. Are you scrolling through the events of the past day? Do twenty squats. Did not help? Make twenty more. Make it a rule not to sit still, but to move. When a person feels danger, he freezes. You do the opposite. Move your body, pump your muscles and drive your thoughts away. Carry weights, do exercises with a skipping rope. Jogging also copes well with a bad mood. Trouble at work? Grab your sneakers and run outside. But you don’t need to sit on the couch and dwell on negativity in your head.
Manifesto
Announce the start date and duration of your manifest. From the date you announced to yourself until the end of the manifesto, your task is to fulfill your obligations.
For example, you set yourself a day of action for tomorrow. From the very morning, instead of rocking and thinking about how to get down to business, you begin to act. Without thoughts or emotions. As soon as you notice the first signs of shirking, remind yourself – take action today!
Almost everyone finds it easier to stay focused and productive if there is confidence that after a certain time the pace can be slowed down. Then the effectiveness of actions during the “active” period reaches unprecedented levels. You will understand what we are talking about if you remember a pleasant evening after spring cleaning.
Start with short periods, you can start with one day and, if necessary, increase the duration of the “active phase”. Sometimes circumstances are such that it is necessary to declare a year of action.
Get organized
If you don't know how to learn not to think about anything, start cleaning up your home. The point is that your environment reflects your thoughts. If they are not in order, then there will be a mess around you. Make sure that every item in your home has its own place so that you can always find the thing you need. It is often said that thoughts need to be sorted into shelves. So, do the easier task first. Put things on shelves. The environment greatly influences your psycho-emotional state. Therefore, try to be surrounded by aesthetics everywhere. Pay special attention to your bag and desk. They should always be in perfect order.
One of the main reasons for overthinking is idleness.
When we don't occupy our mind with anything, our thoughts begin to wander. We should try to anticipate what could go wrong in our lives. We can anticipate decisions in advance. This is an instinctive survival mechanism. Unfortunately, many of us fail to move beyond the stage of identifying what could go wrong. We get stuck at this stage and begin to pile up mountains of nonsense. Excessive thinking leads us to collapse.
To stop thinking, find yourself a regular activity. Create a daily schedule filled with constructive activities. Make sure you follow it. Fill it with work and try to live up to it. This will occupy your mind and save you from unnecessary thinking.
Live in the present tense
Often we are haunted by ghosts from the past. We think that in that situation twenty years ago we should have acted differently. Stop beating yourself up for past mistakes. Live in the present tense. You probably have an interesting life that you really need to worry about, so stop chasing ghosts that don't exist. If you don't have enough impressions, keep yourself busy with something. At least start traveling. Let your old experiences be replaced by new positive emotions.
Take these simple recommendations into account. But remember that your success depends only on a sincere desire to get rid of negative thoughts. Stop reveling in negativity and live on the bright side of life.
Does this happen to you too?
We should have started the task a long time ago, but we keep delaying the moment, doing something completely unnecessary. The feeling of guilt from a small cat scratch has already grown to the scale of unbearable remorse of an indignant conscience, but this does not force you to get down to business.
It’s not so bad when it comes to everyday matters, but over time, this strategy extends to serious, urgent matters, and becomes a way of life. The result is failures, small, big and global.
It turns out that the situation is not hopeless; you can get out of the clutches of chronic inaction. Psychologists could not leave us to the mercy of fate, and developed effective recommendations that should get rid of the harmful habit of postponing things until later. I will tell you about seven methods, among which you will certainly be able to choose the ones that are right for you.
How our thoughts affect our body
Our thoughts directly affect our body.
I have noticed from my own experience that if you constantly think that extra dessert will have a bad effect on your figure, then it will be so.
You will gain weight by leaps and bounds.
And these standard thoughts will be to blame for everything.
But you can think differently...
The French, whose culture is quite supportive of wine, smoking, cakes (total saxap!) and savory sauces (total cholesterol!), consume all this and live to a ripe old age, remaining healthy and slim.
Many studies have been carried out in an attempt to understand their “secret”, because, according to modern theories, a person needs to have a coronary bypass installed almost after every visit to a candy store.
However, there is no secret. It's all about the mood. The French eat with pleasure and without guilt.
You can make it a rule: every time you eat something sweet, tell yourself:
I am becoming slimmer and more beautiful every day.
I can eat whatever I want, I'm still getting thinner.
I have a very fast metabolism.
A hearty dinner is digested very quickly and goes towards building muscles.
Everything depends on you.
Throw out of your head all the thoughts and opinions that society instills in you.
Think only about what you want. You have the right to do so.
If you want to have a beautiful body, tell yourself this when looking in the mirror:
I have a gorgeous beautiful body.
Let it seem to you at first that this is a cruel lie.
After some time, reality will change and you will see in the mirror what you thought about every day.
Time to take action
You need to start by overcoming doubts. Now is the perfect time to step up and take action. We wait for the right moment to start, not realizing that it just needs to be created. It's time to bring your plans to life.
Unleash your potential gradually and no matter that there have been failures before, it is possible that they will happen again. Now it is clear that, overcoming the next obstacle, invaluable experience is accumulated and it will be beneficial in the future.
Moving forward and taking action is what is important now.
Mood
The better your mood, the less you worry about something. Anything could happen here. You need to think about in what cases you are in the best mood: someone is having success in work and finances, another is having a great get-together with friends, a third is more into books and movies, and a fourth is enjoying debauchery with strange madams. Biohackers mix all the points at once) There is no right or wrong way. The range of pleasures is wide and differs from person to person. So remember when and under what circumstances you feel cool.
It’s worth mentioning separately about massage and meditation. Massage is a great way to reduce the stress hormones cortisol and norepinephrine, which indirectly improves your mood (5).
Well, there was an episode about meditation. Here, for example, is a meta-analysis from the 17th year, which talks about a decrease in cortisol, c-reactive protein, and blood pressure (6). Simply put, a thing that is useful for the psyche and mood!
The first 2 biohacks are like different poles from the norm. Sport is closer to pain, albeit useful. Feeling great is the opposite of pain. Although there are overlapping points here, the massage itself causes discomfort, but on the contrary, it reduces stress in the long term, or Runner’s Euphoria, when a person experiences an almost narcotic high after a certain kilometer due to the activation of the cannabinoid and opioid systems (7). It’s quite an unusual feeling, I must say, it seems like you’re tired, but you seem to be rushing, +10 to charisma and mood.
Find motivation and take action
What is your true motivation? What moves you towards your goal? Without understanding this, you will not be able to go up. What do you want in the end? Wealth? But this is not so. All people want happiness and freedom, take as much as you can carry, everything is in your hands. Start doing something that brings you closer to your cherished goal, small steps, every day. Write them down, make a detailed plan and everything will work out. This is how all successful (namely successful and talented) people start, by searching for real motivation to achieve a goal. Wealth and fame are just tools on the true path.
