No one will be surprised if they tell him that a charismatic man can win the heart of any girl. Male charisma is simply a universal thing that can win the heart of any representative of the opposite sex. That is why every representative of the stronger sex who wants to achieve some success and always feel confident should be interested in how a man can develop charisma.
To the question of how to become a charismatic man, many have been trying to find the answer for years, but have not found it. This is all because representatives of the stronger sex look at this issue superficially, without delving into details. You need to approach this task a little differently and everything will definitely work out.
What will interfere with charisma?
Charisma will never tolerate the following qualities in a man:
- Pessimism, tediousness, negative emotions.
- If you yourself are guilty of something, you should never look for the guilty among others, you must be responsible for your actions.
- Under no circumstances should you express superiority over other people.
- Don't get annoyed if something doesn't go as planned.
- There is no need to criticize people.
- You should not give advice to others if they have not asked for it and do not need it.
Is it possible to check your ability level and how to do it?
Charisma is not an ephemeral substance; its approximate level can be determined independently.
If the test taker gives a positive answer to most questions, then signs of innate charisma are evident. Charismatic for sure:
- Always smiles and is friendly to people.
- Gets along with anyone and resolves conflicts easily.
- Knows how to influence a group of people (team, class).
- Noticeable in the largest company and at any party.
To more accurately check the level of inner charm, there are a lot of online psychological tests.
An important quality is self-confidence.
Not a single man with self-confidence has ever been left out of society. It is very important when a person is confident in his exclusivity. There is no need to rush around, argue, reproach yourself for something, or constantly seek advice from others.
A man must convince himself and believe that he is an extraordinary person, that all his actions are correct, attractive and talented. This is not selfishness, this is precisely confidence. Such a person should radiate health, positive emotions and optimism. Therefore, no bad mood, best friends are sports, yoga, auto training. A man can correct his image, love him and assure others that being around him is a pleasure.
A man - the main signs of a strong personality
Female and male behavior initially have a different nature . A charismatic woman is one who can solve any problem on her own, but will not do it. She will attract male power to solve simple and complex life situations where appropriate.
On the contrary, male charisma has completely different characteristics. Representatives of the weak half of humanity literally melt under the gaze of men with the following features:
- internal potential or the ability to make complex decisions, implement them and take responsibility for the result;
- the ability to fully concentrate on the interlocutor at the moment of communication;
- emotional sensitivity, which manifests itself as the ability to understand the feelings of the interlocutor and sincerely empathize with him.
It is important to understand that the most attractive men are those who equally combine all of the above qualities. In addition, absolutely all charismatics, regardless of gender:
- are distinguished by absolute confidence in their own abilities;
- control their own emotions well in any situation;
- have a keen sense of established social connections in the team;
- are able to establish contact with a person of any status and age;
- They speak beautifully and enthusiastically, and clearly express their thoughts.
Be a great conversationalist
The ability to listen is one of the main qualities of a charismatic person. When another person is speaking, you should never interrupt him, he should finish his thought to the end and feel comfortable in communication. You need to show your interest in your interlocutor, ask him questions about himself, about his hobbies. Don't overload with your information. It is advisable to touch upon in conversations only topics on which the opinion with the interlocutor coincides, then the dialogue will be positive. We must remember that having an interesting conversation is good, but listening is the highest art.
You need to compliment people sincerely and freely, and in no case flatter, but rather confirm their best qualities. You should also accept good reviews addressed to you graciously.
A man must learn to speak on completely different topics, with any people . You should always be on an equal footing with your interlocutor. When talking to a sponsor or employer, do not assume that they are superior. If you are talking with new acquaintances, you should never show your superiority over them, no matter who they are.
You need to develop eloquence, train the skill of a speaker, learn to speak convincingly, accessiblely and beautifully. Often charisma depends on the voice.
Useful tips and books
The level of internal magnetism does not depend on social status, appearance or financial condition. Anyone with a strong desire can develop charisma to unprecedented heights. First of all, you need to develop the following skills:
- the ability to communicate and speak correctly with one interlocutor or a large audience;
- look positively at life and the people around you, do not judge yourself for the past;
- boldly make decisions despite other people’s pressure, be whole;
- keep your own emotions under control, but do not lose sincerity.
It is fundamentally important to take responsibility for your own life, set goals and achieve them through hard work.
It is very useful to read such books in your spare time.:
- “12 chairs” by Ilf and Petrov, to learn how to approach people.
- “The power of charm. How to Win Hearts and Succeed by Brian Tracy and Ron Arden to develop your communication skills.
- "Charisma. The Art of Successful Communication” , Barbara and Alan Pease, to establish emotional contact with your interlocutor.
- "Between enema and charisma" . Samvel Avetisyan will help you speak a rich and lively language.
- “The Psychology of Influence” by Robert Cialdini will teach you to understand other people and the motives of their actions.
Any charismatic person is passionate about something in life. It is important to find your passion for a particular topic. Over time, having become a specialist in this field, a person automatically attracts the attention of others to himself with his own uniqueness. A good source of inspiration will be the book “Destination. Find your life’s work and realize your dreams,” author Alexander Rey.
Charisma in everything, even in body language
A person with charisma always stands or walks straight, decisively, and confidently. He will not cross his arms over his chest, but will gesticulate beautifully with them. Reliable, competent, successful people always use body language very skillfully. You can follow such people and adopt the most interesting of them for yourself.
You should never be afraid to look people straight in the eyes, you should not look away, you should not look around, constantly being distracted by your phone or watch. You need to attract attention not only with your voice, but also with a sincere look. A real smile can disarm anyone. And you can practice your gestures, glances and smile at home in front of the mirror. Incorrect body language can reveal shyness and indecisiveness. Regular training and working on your mistakes will bring excellent results.
Appearance
Appearance is not everything, but no one has canceled that either. You will convey your message to people much faster if your appearance matches your internal content.
Appearance
Sure, you can show up to a dinner party in shorts and a T-shirt, but you'll have to put in a lot more effort to impress those around you.
Therefore, appearance is not everything, but it is a very good helper.
You may be interested in - How to become successful and self-confident
Emotional intellect
No matter how bad you are financially, women still pay attention to your appearance and emotionality. The better you control your emotions, the easier it is for you to show that this particular chick is worthy of your attention. The main thing here is not to overdo it. An overly emotional alpha guy looks like a clown.
In addition, developed emotional intelligence implies understanding the emotions and feelings of others. That is, you read how your tackles are coming in and change your shoes in flight if you realize that they’re not coming in at all.
You must learn to tune in to the same wavelength as a woman, understand her experiences and support her. Then not a single high-status beauty will be able to resist your advances.
The ability to read emotions will also help in career growth. Who do you think the boss will listen to more: the guy with the balls or the mumbling snot? Just don’t go into things you don’t understand. Study the topic thoroughly so that they will listen to you.
Recommendations for women
As for the weaker sex, it is even more important for them to form a positive impression of themselves. Many girls are willing to sacrifice some things to achieve their goals. To attract attention you need to follow two simple recommendations:
- Ability to carry on a conversation. An intelligent woman looks more interesting and attractive. To make a favorable impression, you must act in accordance with your inner beliefs and be a holistic person.
- Careful consideration of the external image. You need to organize your wardrobe wisely, and not just buy everything you like. Beauty is an art that needs to be learned.
READ Accentuation of character: causes, typology and diagnosis
Basic mistakes
When developing inner charisma, it is important not to get lost among other people and not become an element of the gray mass. What you should watch out for first:
- When communicating with your interlocutor, you need to listen to him carefully, but you should not hesitate or adjust to please someone else’s point of view, just to please him;
- there is no need to appear perfect and hide your own shortcomings from others, because impeccable people irritate, not attract;
- if you have nothing relevant to say, it is better to remain silent in company than to be branded as a meaningless chatterbox;
- the sense of humor should be natural, and jokes should not be forced (first of all, you need to be able to laugh at yourself, and not at your interlocutor);
- control excessive natural emotionality, so as not to be considered eccentric, like Captain Jack Sparrow.
Charisma is a subtle and elusive matter at first glance. In the absence of innate charisma, it is more difficult to develop it, but the goal is achievable for anyone. The most important rule to remember is that it is strictly forbidden to break yourself, you just need to educate yourself!
Find a role model
Each person is individual - this statement is indisputable and beyond doubt. But patterns of behavior are similar, especially among representatives of general social categories. Musicians are like other musicians, bandits are like bandits, and teachers are like teachers. Likewise, there are those from whom you can learn how to be charismatic. You must select an identical type. If you are impressed by the charisma of power, you should find a brutal “teacher”.
If the charisma of kindness is closer, then it is better to look among kind people. But there is always an opportunity to spy - among acquaintances, among famous residents of the city, among public figures of the country or the world. If there is no analogue in the real world, movie or book characters will do. The main thing to understand is that the characters’ reaction to the actions of a fictional person will not always correspond to the life situation. The hero and his entire entourage were invented by one person who modeled the plot at his own discretion. And where a fictional lady throws herself into the arms of a brutal movie hero, in real life there would be a slap in the face and a call to the police. So, real examples are much more useful for answering the question of how to develop charisma. And books and films simply complement this process.
Take the self-esteem test
Effective exercises
It is important to understand that the development of charisma begins with complete acceptance of oneself, one’s own individuality and uniqueness. This will help you identify your own strengths and move in the right direction along the path of least resistance. The following exercises will help :
- Language of the body . To do this, you need to look in a large mirror for 15-30 minutes every day and talk in front of an imaginary audience. At the same time, it is important to note your own mistakes and correct them. This could be a hunched back, crossed arms and legs, or repulsive facial expressions.
- Development of the discipline . You need to create a daily routine and strictly adhere to it for a month, even through force. Further actions will automatically become a habit, and it will become easier. Regular participation in any sport greatly contributes to the development of willpower.
- High goals . After the skill of discipline has been successfully developed, you can set big goals and achieve them within the specified time frame. You need to start with a specific and achievable task in the short term. A simple SMART technique will be a good assistant in this matter.
- Oratory and listening skills .
The ability to speak beautifully and convincingly is developed independently or in mastery courses. It is useful to watch videos of famous speakers, note their strengths and apply them to yourself. To learn to listen to people carefully, interlocutors do not need to be divided by social status initially; everyone should be treated attentively during a conversation. People feel sincerely related and subconsciously begin to trust their own secrets.
Get to practice faster
Once the deficiency has been identified and a strategy to eliminate it has been determined, training should begin as soon as possible. Breakfasts are good for digestion, but you cannot “feed” yourself “breakfasts” when it comes to your own improvement. The development of charisma is a long process. The sooner it starts, the faster the first results will appear. For example, a person found out that in order to be more popular he lacks oratorical talent.
If he dreams of speaking and daily assures himself that he is a great speaker, there will still be no progress without real practice. You need to gather friends or family to regularly practice speaking in front of them. The most difficult, as a rule, is the first step, and then everything happens by inertia. It is important not to put off training until tomorrow, the day after tomorrow or next week. Although you also need to prepare for completing tasks, otherwise the first experience will be extremely unpleasant. It is important to maintain a balance between I want and I can.
Help others
Kindness has a number of advantages over strength or arrogance. Therefore, it is better to develop the charisma of kindness than to enslave and oppress. Strength tends to leave a person with age, but positive emotions accumulate. People often complain that they don’t want to be friends with them or communicate at all. But if you ask them the question, would you like to have a friend similar to you, many will answer with difficulty. Before you look for someone, you need to understand what you are willing to give to this person. Or better yet, try to become a true friend yourself.
It’s difficult, because it’s one thing to expect something from others, but completely different to give it to people yourself. Help is a universal tool for friendship and charisma development. This is the next stage in the evolution of empathy. Not only understand what the interlocutor needs, but also try to help him. Sincerely, from the heart, without the slightest hint of commercialism. Many coaches advise that before asking a person, first give him something. This algorithm works with an almost 100% guarantee. All people are selfish and only after receiving a gift or service do they open up to dialogue. Help is better than a gift - it is valued more highly.
Take a personality type test
Practice self-esteem
Nobody likes to be a moth when they are blatantly ignored or wiped their feet. Now let's think: what do you need for self-confidence? Grandmas, cool chicks, status? Well ok, now let's go and achieve it.
Grandmas don't appear by themselves. You need to at least find the vein where exactly you can become successful.
Yes, there is a chance to screw everything up. But we remember that mistakes make us stronger and give us invaluable experience so that we can close the gaps in our next attempts. And even if you are fucking smart, no one will see it until you start applying your knowledge in action.
Modern society recognizes those who have a longer penis and a tighter wallet. Be a smart and good boy for your mother, and become an authority for others. You can, of course, pretend that this is normal. But if you’ve read up to this point, it’s annoying, right?
Watch your posture
A charismatic person is distinguished by his demeanor. He is characterized by majesty, stateliness, and impressiveness.
Think about someone you know who you consider charismatic. Imagine his image. Have you ever seen him hunch over and shrink, trying to appear smaller? Or did he stand with his shoulders back, inspiring respect with his entire appearance? The answer is obvious.
Watch your posture. Keep your shoulders back, your back straight, and your head held high. Strive to fill the space with yourself. Then people will see charisma in you.
Development of oratory
Although charismatic people have completely different personalities with their own unique styles, they have one thing in common: rhetorical skill. What can be done to improve speech culture?
The first step is to reconsider the manner of everyday communication. It is important to be attentive to those with whom you are having a conversation , and it does not matter whether it is a virtual correspondence between a guy and a girl or a discussion in real life with a group of people. Each audience has its own language, so you should not communicate with an intelligent adult in youth slang.
Before starting the story, the listener should be made clear for what purpose he is being addressed. A good speaker always strives for dialogue. His primary task is to encourage the audience to approve , because initially not everyone is inclined to support the speaker. When talking about something, you need to give examples from life, since real stories inspire and inspire people. It is also worth making small pauses in those places where, in the opinion of the speaker, it is necessary to focus attention.
It is imperative to develop diction. Special articulation exercises and tongue twisters will help with this.
